Anyone else having a hard time not being paranoid?

hratclif · January 2012

We had an u/s at 6w3d and saw a little heartbeat and everything looked great and totally normal. I had an appointment with my NP at 9 weeks and she didn't even try to find a heartbeat at that point, but now I don't go back until I'm 14 weeks and I'm a nervous wreck. I am so scared that they aren't going to be able to find a heartbeat, and reading posts here about missed m/c's isn't helping. Now I'm having a slight decrease in symptoms, feeling a little better this week, not nearly as queasy, tired, or hungry.

Anyone else feeling this way? Is it normal? Anyone have some encouraging words?

Jesskent23 · January 2012

It's been hard for me lately to stay calm and just trust that everything is ok! I haven't had an u/s yet or even heard the heart beat! I went in around 9 wks for my first apt, which is normally just the confirm PG talk with the Dr and do blood work and she scheduled me for the 1st available u/s to determine exactly how far along I am which was FOUR weeks away! I FINALLY go in tomorrow but I still can't help but be a nervous wreck after all the loses we've had lately! Even though I haven't any of the issues that I had with my first pregnancy! Whew, that was long! I'm just glad i'm not alone! I can't wait to be able to relax and just enjoy being PG.

Jesskent23 · January 2012

I just realized I ended every sentence with an exclamation point. Man I need some sleep.

bell2belling · January 2012

I feel the same way. I'm worrying an insane amount lately. I heard and saw the heartbeat at 8w5d but I'm worried when I go back on Friday they won't find a heartbeat. The fact that I'm starting to feel better is only freaking me out more.

I just looked up the statistics and found that a missed miscarriage only happens in 1% of pregnancies. I don't know how accurate that is since I found it through googling, but I'll let that comfort me for a bit.

christieep · January 2012

I'm a little anxious for my appt tomorrow. We are supposed to be able to hear the heartbeat. I think I will feel relief after we hear that. Besides the nausea, it doesn't quite seem real.

Kayte317 · January 2012

I was in the exact same position as you! I had my first U/S appt a 6w3d and everything looked great! I had my second appt at 9w4d and the OB did nothing but ask questions and do a quick physical. I didn't get to hear the heartbeat or anything. I had my NT scan yesterday and I was panicking that they would do the U/S and there would be a sac but no baby. I too in week 10 had a decrease in symptoms which logically is around the right time for it to happen but it still completely freaked me out. Everything was perfect at the NT scan. The baby looked like a baby and we got to hear the heartbeat (167 bpm)! Try to relax, I know it's near impossible. Good luck!

dalandrea · January 2012

I'm the same way. I get a huge sense of relief after every appointment when I get confirmation that things are ok, but the days leading up to my next appointment, I start getting paranoid that they will find something wrong. I'm finally starting to relax a little. We had our NT scan yesterday and they said baby looks great and is really thriving, so now that I'm out of 1st tri, I think I can finally enjoy it a little. I know there's still a chance something could go wrong, but my New Year's Resolution is to stop worrying, and focus on bringing a healthy baby into this world. As hard as it is, you have to find a way to feel confident, because worry causes stress.... but I totally know what you mean!

hratclif · January 2012

bell2belling:
I feel the same way. I'm worrying an insane amount lately. I heard and saw the heartbeat at 8w5d but I'm worried when I go back on Friday they won't find a heartbeat. The fact that I'm starting to feel better is only freaking me out more.
I just looked up the statistics and found that a missed miscarriage only happens in 1% of pregnancies. I don't know how accurate that is since I found it through googling, but I'll let that comfort me for a bit.

I found that same statistic I think I'm more fearful of that than if I started bleeding just because then I would know what was happening, you know? I try to remember that thousands of babies are born each day, and have been for thousands of years, all over the world. Sometimes I don't know how women coped before ultrasounds and dopplers!

maykious · January 2012

OMG, yes. I don't know what came over me, but in the last couple of weeks leading up to today's appointment, I've been having these horrible little daydream things where I can just picture us at the appointment, not finding the heartbeat, having to go in for a US, then hearing terrible news. I don't know where this came from, since I have no history of miscarriage or other issues, but then, I've never been pregnant before so there's no telling. Just weird little paranoia issues. It's unnerving because that's sooo not me.

JessKent, you made me giggle. When I saw your post about ending each sentence in an exclamation point, I went back and read it that way. It was funny. Smile

katjns75 · January 2012

I feel the same way. I had a m/c in sept so it's hard for me not to worry. I had my dating u/s at 6w2d and saw the heartbeat and I went to the ER because I was having cramps so I freaked out and saw the baby and the heartbeat again and the dr said everything looked great. I have my NT next Tuesday and I still worry. I am trying my best to relax and I know that things are okay, I just need to stop worrying and relax.

bsn1752 · January 2012

I have been a nervous wreck.

Thank you for posting this... I know that almost all of us feel this way, just not many are brave enough to say it.

nogitron · January 2012

Yes! Reading the recent posts from gals who have gone in for a normal checkup and found that the baby had stopped growing weeks earlier, or was just gone, have REALLY got me worried for my next checkup . . . which isn't for two more weeks!

The fact that my one symptom - exhaustion - is letting up is making me nervous as well. I AM coming right up on the 2nd trimester . . . but I'm not even 12 weeks yet, is that too soon?

Trying not to stress about it and focus on the positive, and look forward to hearing the heartbeat in a few weeks. But yeah, the paranoia is definitely there, too.

LM915 · January 2012

I have been so nervous lately too... especially the past few days as my nausea is basically gone now. We had the NT Scan two weeks ago around 11 weeks, and we saw the baby jumping around, saw & heard the heartbeat, everything looked great, our NT results were fantastic... yet, I am still worried. I don't have another appt until january 17th and I'm so worried about a missed m/c. I hate seeing other girls go through it on the board, and I can't help but be nervous about it happening to me.

avanmil · January 2012

I have also been a nervous wreck! I just want to know what is going on in there. I had an u/s at 9 weeks 6 days and saw the baby and heartbeat, but that was a couple weeks ago now. I have heard that once you hear the heartbeat, your risk of miscarriage is only 3%. I have appointment for blood work and check up on January 12th, and I hope I will get to hear the heartbeat for reassurance....

On a side note, when I had my u/s, the tech wouldn't let DH in at first because (her words) "one of the main reasons for the inital u/s is to take measurements and check make sure there is life"...If there wasn't a heartbeat found, don't you think the first person I would want is DH, not a stranger u/s tech. She also said that would be the case for every u/s in the future. This is my first pregnancy and I found that to be ridiculous. Is this typical??..well that's my rant for the day

nogitron · January 2012

avanmil:
...On a side note, when I had my u/s, the tech wouldn't let DH in at first . . . This is my first pregnancy and I found that to be ridiculous. Is this typical??

At my first ultrasound DH and his son were both in there with me! Nobody said anything (even though it was pretty tight in the room with 2 u/s ladies and the three of us!)

packfan20 · January 2012

avanmil:

On a side note, when I had my u/s, the tech wouldn't let DH in at first because (her words) "one of the main reasons for the inital u/s is to take measurements and check make sure there is life"...If there wasn't a heartbeat found, don't you think the first person I would want is DH, not a stranger u/s tech. She also said that would be the case for every u/s in the future. This is my first pregnancy and I found that to be ridiculous. Is this typical??..well that's my rant for the day

Wait, what? I'm also expecting my first but I would not have been okay with that no matter what. DH has been with me for every appointment/ultrasound. If something is wrong, I don't want to be a mess alone. I don't see a reason why he couldn't be there so if that's what you want, I would tell them he's coming in. Wouldn't he want to see his baby too???

avanmil · January 2012

nogitron:
avanmil:

...On a side note, when I had my u/s, the tech wouldn't let DH in at first . . . This is my first pregnancy and I found that to be ridiculous. Is this typical??

At my first ultrasound DH and his son were both in there with me! Nobody said anything (even though it was pretty tight in the room with 2 u/s ladies and the three of us!)

Thanks for the info I figured it wasn't a completely normal thing. At first I felt bad for making a stink about it, cause she is just doing her job and following procedures...but this is my time and my and DH's first. I'm scared enough as it is without having to be alone

bsn1752 · January 2012

nogitron:

Yes! Reading the recent posts from gals who have gone in for a normal checkup and found that the baby had stopped growing weeks earlier, or was just gone, have REALLY got me worried for my next checkup . . . which isn't for two more weeks!

The fact that my one symptom - exhaustion - is letting up is making me nervous as well. I AM coming right up on the 2nd trimester . . . but I'm not even 12 weeks yet, is that too soon?

Trying not to stress about it and focus on the positive, and look forward to hearing the heartbeat in a few weeks. But yeah, the paranoia is definitely there, too.

We're due the same date - my symptoms have been gone for 2 weeks! I am naturally pretty tired early in the evenings, and I can't tell whether or not I'm normal tired, or pregnant tired. It doesn't help the freaking out at all.

avanmil · January 2012

packfan20:
avanmil:

On a side note, when I had my u/s, the tech wouldn't let DH in at first because (her words) "one of the main reasons for the inital u/s is to take measurements and check make sure there is life"...If there wasn't a heartbeat found, don't you think the first person I would want is DH, not a stranger u/s tech. She also said that would be the case for every u/s in the future. This is my first pregnancy and I found that to be ridiculous. Is this typical??..well that's my rant for the day

Wait, what? I'm also expecting my first but I would not have been okay with that no matter what. DH has been with me for every appointment/ultrasound. If something is wrong, I don't want to be a mess alone. I don't see a reason why he couldn't be there so if that's what you want, I would tell them he's coming in. Wouldn't he want to see his baby too???

I agree..being alone would be the worst if something were to be wrong. She called him in after to see the baby and heartbeat, but that was after she told him there could be no heartbeat and waited 15 minutes to go get him....he was freaking out in the waiting room, poor guy.

kaesha · January 2012

bsn1752:
nogitron:

Yes! Reading the recent posts from gals who have gone in for a normal checkup and found that the baby had stopped growing weeks earlier, or was just gone, have REALLY got me worried for my next checkup . . . which isn't for two more weeks!

The fact that my one symptom - exhaustion - is letting up is making me nervous as well. I AM coming right up on the 2nd trimester . . . but I'm not even 12 weeks yet, is that too soon?

Trying not to stress about it and focus on the positive, and look forward to hearing the heartbeat in a few weeks. But yeah, the paranoia is definitely there, too.

We're due the same date - my symptoms have been gone for 2 weeks! I am naturally pretty tired early in the evenings, and I can't tell whether or not I'm normal tired, or pregnant tired. It doesn't help the freaking out at all.

I'm two days behind your due date, and my symptoms disappeared two weeks ago too. I was totally freaked. Thankfully I had an appointment yesterday and everything was fine (heartbeat - check, ultrasound - a-okay) so I'm finally breathing a little bit. It's hard not to be concerned when you know just how dicey things are.

FlannelGrl · January 2012

My boobs haven't been hurting as bad but I'm still really tired and have some nausau still. At least I have those symptoms to comfort me.

My SIL had a miscarraige at 17 weeks over the summer, so that's been freaking me out. I keep trying to tell myself there is nothing I can do anyway, exept eat healthy and rest. And it is comforting to have already seen the baby and the heartbeat. I haven't heard it yet.

I'm glad I'm not the only one freaking out! lol

agapeflower117 · January 2012

I'm totally having a hard time. You are most definitely not alone!

I'm like a PP in that I haven't heard the heartbeat/had an ultrasound yet (but it's coming up on Monday, 1/9!), so I've been plagued by all sorts of terrifying thoughts and what ifs and all I do all day is hope the baby is okay and hope I didn't contract listeria somehow (even though I've been super careful about what I'm eating).

What helps me sometimes is just to remember that I have to "Check Myself Before I Wreck Myself," because if I let myself, I WILL, lol. So I made a list of things to do that will help me not be so anxious, and try to do those things. If those don't work, I just try to sleep, haha.

I'm sure I'll get more and more nervous leading up to the u/s day, but we'll see what happens in the meantime!

Hang in there and try your best to focus on good things!

Waiting_for_the_question · January 2012

My symptoms have only decreased slightly.. I still feel sick for at least part of every day, although my energy level is increasing. That should make me feel more confident about my appointment tomorrow, but I'm with you; seeing the late 1st tri m/cs is freaking me out. If she doesn't want to check the heartbeat tomorrow, I'm going to let her know how freaked out I am so she does!

mandalinn25 · January 2012

Oh sure...but I refuse to live in fear. It took me tons of time and money to get here and it is hard for me to enjoy it. But living in fear isn't going to change nothing. I just take it me day at a time and enjoy as much as I can. Having the doppler helps too. Hugs ladies.

christyp80 · January 2012

Totally paranoid. Or maybe not paranoid, but the worry is always in the back of my mind. And I don't think it will go away anytime soon! Right now I worry about miscarriage, soon I know I'll start worrying about birth defects or something going wrong later in the pregnancy, then I'll worry about birth, then once s/he is here I'll worry about SIDS, then daycare and stairs and rolling off the bed and choking and allergies and illnesses. The list goes on! I think it's just parenting! I just try to tell myself, "Today, I am pregnant with a healthy baby." I'll say that until I know otherwise...hopefully it won't be otherwise until I can say, "Today, I have a healthy baby in my arms!"

VAsjt00 · January 2012

I'm sorry you're feeling nervous. This is my third pregnancy, and I've had the terrible misfortune to be one of those ladies with a later miscarriage during my first pregnancy, but I've also had the wonderful blessing of a perfect LO. What's funny is that while I am literally painfully aware of what can go wrong, I'm somehow less worried about it (granted I was a hot mess the whole first trimester of my last pregnancy! . Here's a few of the reasons why I make a conscious effort not to worry, and I really hope they might help someone who's fretting.

1-Not to be a debbie downer, but really...knowing what can go wrong doesn't help when something does. I can speak from experience when I say the only thing that did do was leave me feeling guilty that I didn't just let go and enjoy what good times I did have.

2-Life is risky. We don't freak every time we drive to work, but we're used to taking that risk. Pregnancy is new, and while the risk to our LO's at this point is probably not so high, it's still scary because it's new. It'll get easier--we just have to get used to our new normal.

3-We're moms now. Our babies deserve a happy place to live. I'm not letting mine swim in a pool of my stress hormones. Even if these 11 weeks are the only slice of life my baby gets, I want them to be a good 11 weeks. That's on me, and I can give that to my baby.

Being a mom is so mind-blowingly amazing, and it's not altogether different from just being pregnant in terms of stress. There's plenty to wonder about when they're on this side of our bellies, but it's easier because we've got that god-awful practice from being pregnant!

Now, if someone can just talk me down from worrying about how my first LO is going to handle this next one, I'll be the shining example of stress-less pregnant ladies!

purplehaze11 · January 2012

Definitely with you all ladies. I have yet to hear a heartbeat or have an ultrasound, so I feel so worried, esp after the couple of recent posts about missed m/c. My mother thinks I'm a tad crazy, and she's probably right. I'm counting down until my appointment on the 17th, where my doctor said we can look for a heartbeat. My ultrasound is only Feb 28... seems so far away!

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