New SAHMs: How are you adjusting?

wcmama · January 2012

I know a few people were lucky enough to become SAHMs. I'm curious, how are you adjusting to it? Do you miss anything about work?

blue_angeleyes06 · January 2012

I mostly miss being around people. As much as I love my DD, I wish I was out of the house sometimes so I could make new friends. We just moved to a new state, and work is how I usually make friends.

butterflynola · January 2012

I love it and feel like it's a real priviledge to get to do this, But it's hard and a lot of people I know (friends and DH), sometimes fail to realize how hard it is and think it's like I just sit at home and play all day lol I had a pretty demanding job that I gave up and it was Way easier than being a SAHM! But still I wouldn't trade it for the world. As far as adusting though sometimes I'm a little stir crazy since everyone else I know works or is about to go back.

Jazzym12 · January 2012

I'm loving it so far! I feel extremely lucky to stay at home. I left a stressful high paced job and this is by far harder. I do miss my coworkers and being able to socialize with them and my clients. I'm lucky though because I still am teaching aerobics so a couple days a week I still get to interact with adults other then my hubby.

Tinkertini3 · January 2012

My husband & I own a small boutique together so I'm lucky I get to spend time at home. I run the online store, so I still get to do some work. We're moving our location closer to our home soon, so I am going to put a little mini-nursery back by our offices & hopefully take her to work with me! I feel very fortunate to be able to do something like this. I don't really miss being there & dealing with customer service at all! I love being home with my baby girl. It is a lot of work, but it's amazing every day.

Princess Fireball · January 2012

I'm loving it! I moved last year and was only working part time as a sub teacher. I do miss teaching my kids and playing gigs though. I have few friends at home (I'm at my parents, for help/support) so I'm kind of isolated there. I do miss being able to run into a store for 5 min and getting out. Now it seems like such a chore to go anywhere so I mainly stay home. I spend our wake time playing, reading, taking pics and video. I think staying at home is a lot harder than working a full time job. Although, I can't imagine working a full time job and then coming home trying to cook, clean, spend time with hubby and baby, that would be exhausting!

scarlettoctober · January 2012

I'm doing better with it now that I'm getting out of the house more. I wouldn't take DS anywhere I didn't have to, because I was EPing and I felt tied to the breast pump. I recently decided to go all formula, since I was continually increasing the amount I had to supplement and that has made me feel so much better. DS is sleeping longer stretches (sometimes all night) so I don't need to nap as frequently so I plan little things to do while he's asleep. I mix up fun stuff with chores to keep it interesting.

I miss having a conversation with someone who has a bigger vocabularly than "wah!" I miss dressing up for the office, which I find strange. I used to get up in the morning and wish I could put on jeans or yoga pants and now that I wear them daily, I find myself eyeing my suits and dresses longingly. I don't miss having to scrape off the car in the mornings, though!

bumpuser4307348 · January 2012

danes22:
I'll be a SAHM until fall of this year. I absolutely love spending my time with DS and can't imagine not staying home with him every day, but it is waaay more exhausting than I ever imagined (and I was a nanny and child care worker for years)! One thing that has been really difficult for me is splitting duties with my SO. He works a lot and I get so used to doing everything for DS that when SO is home I often continue to do everything for DS because it's easier than way. He keeps reminding me that it is okay for us to go about caring for DS in different ways, but it's soo hard for me to bite my tongue when all I want to do is yell "He's crying because he doesn't like to be held that way!"

Me to a T! It is so hard for me to let DH do it his way. I sometimes tell him that I tried to wake him up for the night feeding, when in reality I just do it myself! He likes to turn the lights on and talk to LO, but I keep everything quiet and prefer my way! Is this an early FFFC?!

BettyBookworm · January 2012

I think I'm adjusting well for the most part. Here's what I miss (in no particular order):

1.) Interaction with people that can talk back lol -- I love getting to be here with DD, but I really miss getting to have conversations.

2.) A meal uninterrupted-- DD has this sixth sense about when I want to eat. She can be napping contently but the minute I try to shovel some food into my pie-hole its like meltdown city. Its frustrating because I'll calm her and she'll drop back off to sleep. I go to move utensil to mouth & we are back at it again. I spend about two hours trying to eat in the mornings and lunch is a similar situation.

3.) A break. I know it sounds silly, but at a regular 9-5 you get some scheduled breaks. Not so much with SAHM! I didn't realize how much I looked forward to the 15 minutes at my old job just to sit there, and let my mind wander. Now every spare moment is spent preparing for when LO wakes up again. I suppose I'll be looking to incorporate some breaks in there, but when DH gets home I ask him just to look after her for about 20 minutes while I walk around outside and take a breather.

The other thing I wasn't anticipating (and probably should have) was how hard it is to be needed 24/7. Its exhausting! I love being a mommy and adore my DD, but those 20 minutes of "me" time when DH gets home are a life-saver.

I still would rather be doing this then my old job though!

jlct0679 · January 2012

I am loving being a SAHM! It is what I always wanted to do. It is harder than I thought though!

JillD2011 · January 2012

It's definitely been taking some getting used to. I still haven't decided what I will be doing in September when my maternity leave is over. I love being at home with her, and even though it's still months away I still get anxious when thinking that I might have to go back to work. Husband is in the army and we are relocating in July, so I may get to take more time off since I will have to leave my current position.

I love being home with her. We have been having trouble filling up our days to keep me from going crazy, but I just signed us up for a stroller bootcamp three mornings a week. I'm also looking into 2 different infant playgroups for babies under 2 (mommy coffee break really). Hopefully that will help to keep us busy.

As PP mentioned, I also have trouble with how husband does things sometimes. I try not to jump in, but I often find myself biting my tongue to keep from yelling "that's not what she wants right now, she wants _____!". It's difficult, but I know I have to let him do things his way, too. He has been on holidays since Dec 16, so I'm starting to look forward to getting back to our own routine when he goes back to work next week.

xuxachi · January 2012

I'm really liking being a SAHM. Now that the weather is cold and the sun disappears quickly, I miss getting outside more, but I always feel that way in the winter. I also found a mommy group with kids near LO's age right after my DS was born and we all clicked so we still get together once a week at each other's houses - this has been a sanity check every week, so I feel lucky!

Another thing that has really helped is getting DS on somewhat of a schedule, which means that he's sleeping better and more predictably during the day. It's not perfect, and I don't expect it to be, but even having a target schedule that we work around has helped mentally, and I'm able to get other things done around the house.

wcmama · January 2012

I thought I'd be going back to work today (Jan 3), but during my leave my company was acquired and we were all laid off. I am unexpectedly a SAHM. I'm very thankful for this opportunity but I have also had a little bit of a tough time adjusting. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually sort of miss the structure of a corporate environment! I wouldn't trade my circumstances for the world, but I wouldn't mind a conference call or a reason to wear a suit every now and then! So weird!!

Accounting Chick · January 2012

I'm in Canada, so my maternity leave goes until October 1st, so although I will be going back to work then, for now, I'm a SAHM. I'm loving the time with DS. He's changing so much every day. I feel very blessed to be able to do this. However, I am struggling a bit with my identity.

I'm a Chartered Accountant. Something I worked very hard for and it took a long time to achieve. For so long, that was my goal. Once I achieved it, it became a part of who I was. Suddenly, that's gone. I'm not saying that role of "mommy" is any less important to me than "CA" - it's just very different. I am hoping to do some part time work for my partnership come the busy season (I can work a small number of hours per week without it affecting my benefits). This will accomplish two things - it will help me keep my skills up and it will help me learn to balance both roles I'm looking forward to it.

wcmama · January 2012

Accounting Chick:

I'm a Chartered Accountant. Something I worked very hard for and it took a long time to achieve. For so long, that was my goal. Once I achieved it, it became a part of who I was. Suddenly, that's gone. I'm not saying that role of "mommy" is any less important to me than "CA" - it's just very different.

I hear you. It's strange to let go of a part of your life that was once so important... think about it, pre-baby we spent the majority of our time at work. Its not that motherhood isn't great, or that we'd rather do something else, its just that we loved that, too (albeit it in a different way). Part time or consulting is a great idea; good luck with it!

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