Food Allergy
sefaniee
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DH in denial
sefaniee
member
in Food Allergy
So as my intro stated, we had a blood test which showed DS is allergic to milk, eggs, wheat, peanut and oat. We go in for an endoscopy on Tuesday. I know we're still at the early stages of this but DH is in true denial. DS is refusing to drink the elemental formula and I'm worried we'll have to do a g tube. DS seems to think that he's not been having that big of a problem and we just need to feed him more of the stuff he will eat and everything will be fine. He said people have dealt with this stuff for years without medical intervention so why listen to the doctors. Again I know this is new and there's a fear of the unknown but anyone else experienced this? I'm probably very premature at worrying about his support but maybe just needed to vent!
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Re: DH in denial
My DH was skeptical that LO has a milk senstivity until she mistakenly drank some eggnog and became congested within 20 minutes and hardly slept that night.
I'm not sure your LO's situation, but sometimes for men I think the proof is in the pudding - i.e. they need some concrete evidence something is going on.
Could you ask him to read up on allergies and give him some resources? That way he's not hearing it from you, but other people's experiences? I'm thinking blogs and personal accounts would be better than Dr's articles.
People have dealt with many things without doctors, and I, myself, and skeptical of Dr's, but sometimes you need them and they can offer good support/advice.
Does he come with you to the Dr's appointments? That way he can ask questions also.
good luck!
From our perspective, it can be very hard. Our LO didn't have outward signs of allergy and all the skin/blood testing was negative - his reaction was internal - so we didn't know.
It stinks, but hopefully he'll come around. It takes time to wrap your brain around these things.
Oh my goodness, your poor LO. How did you end up knowing?
I went back and read your intro. I'm so sorry. That sounds so hard for you and your little guy. I can kind of understand how your DH would "freak out" at the thought of a g tube. I think I would too and I don't think you need to be thinking that way yet. I'm sure there are many things you can try before you start to consider that. I'm sure there is a lot to it but talk to the doctors about ways around the elemental formula if he won't take it. What about soy milk smoothies? What finger foods will he eat?
We have have had to eliminate egg, wheat, garlic, all nuts, & soy (although I think soy is a false positive) and it is hard to find safe foods. It is especially hard to find safe foods that they will eat! But there are some! I don't think we have it as hard as you.. I feel so bad for you but I think you will find a way to get his weight up. Once you see the GI specialist and get a plan in place come back and ask for tips on safe high calorie meals/snacks. I think the ladies here can be a great help in that area. Keep us posted.
We found out when we had to g-tube inserted. Luckily, our surgeon's wife was an allergist and he was particularly up-to-date on Eosinophilic Esophagitus and noticed that our son's insides didn't look quite right, so he took a couple of biopsies when they put the tube in. After the surgery, his wife became our allergist!
Thanks for the replies! We're trying Neocate and he's not a huge fan and throws it up about half the time. He refused Elecare. I'm looking forward to our endoscopy on Tuesday because we need answers. He's really not eating much. He loves fruits and yougart so they told us to just feed him what we knows he will eat for now and after the endoscopy we can know what the next steps are. I'll try the rice milk, thankfully he's not allergic to rice! Thanks for the advice.
Oh my goodness, how crazy. I bet you were so thankful the doc had that knowledge. It really sounds like not many pedis are up to speed on EE
dup.
He has a point, but so much about allergies is fairly new. And yes, kids died from things we can treat now. I don't mean to scare him, but the reality is that if you gave birth to this child with these needs in Utah in 1902, he may well have died becuase they didn't know about food allergies or have G-tubes for nutrition. Yes, I get that he's minimizing and desperate to see his child as not needing that much or hey he'll grow out of it. But the flaw in his argument is that many, many children did die, and today they don't. becuase of G-tubes. His child, sadly, may be one that needs a g-tube.
Do you know how doctor's discovered that eating gluten (wheat, barly, rye) caused Celiac disease? The Nazi's constricted it all from the Netherlands for their troops and children stopped dying during WWII. When bread was reintroduced, the symptoms returned. THAT's how they discovered the cause - and cure. This filed is all very new. Just becuase people "did it different" a few years ago, doesn't mean it the best course now.
Anyway, don't explain for your DH. Let the doctor do it. You're convinced, let the doctor convince your husband. That's their expertise and job. Don't make it a wedge between the two of you. Let him deal with the doctor directly.