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Postpartum Depression
swimiz500
member
Intro and question- kind of long
swimiz500
member
Hi ladies. I have been lurking for awhile, since I am not even sure if I have PPD/PPA or just regular old depression/anxiety. I guess maybe a bit of both?
A little background: I have had some depression and anxiety issues for years. When I was pregnant, my doc wanted me to stop all meds (not my OB, my psychiatrist) because he was afraid of birth defects. This sent me into the worst depression and panic I have ever experienced, and my OB put me back on my meds, as she felt it was far better for LO to have a stable mother than to worry about the meds. I attend counseling once a week, and have been for 2 years or so.
After DD was born, I was put back on my pre-pregnancy dose of Effexor and Klonopin (which I didn't take during pregnancy), but I kind of feel like maybe it isn't helping a ton. I cry a lot, but not because I feel overwhelmed or anything, but because I panic on the regular about DD growing up. It is kind of more PPA than PPD I suppose, but when I told my psychiatrist, he kind of brushed it off. I have an appointment in 2 weeks with him again, and it hasn't gotten any better. I don't know if this is normal, or if I should really push him to get a better answer. It isn't like I just get a little sentimental sometimes, it is like outright panic and inconsolable sobbing. I can't stop crying when I think about her growing up and moving away, not being able to snuggle and hug her, etc. When she reaches a new milestone, while I am so happy, I usually end up having a breakdown later when she goes to sleep.
I don't want to live this way, I want to enjoy my DD, but I don't know what else to do. I have told the doctor twice now (the first time he upped my med dose, last time he brushed me off), and any advice would be so appreciated. TIA!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Intro and question- kind of long
Push for a better answer and discuss a different med. I wasnt actually diagnosed PPD and PPA until my DD was over a year old. Tell Dr this has to be better!
Same as you, I have had depression problems most of my life. Anxiety too, but I didnt realize that until I was seeing a councilor regularly.
With this PG, it has been really hard. First stopping Abilify cold turkey when I discovered I was PG. Then weaning off Zoloft around 10 weeks. Major withdrawls for both meds and then we discovered that LO STILL ended up with a cleft lip and palate. Guilt trip still occuring with that!
Thanks so much ladies! I hate that any of us have to deal with these things. I think you are right though, I do deserve a better answer. And as much as I hate to admit it, I think you are right that it may be time for another doctor. I have always liked this one, but lately it has not been working. Thanks so much for your advice, and I hope things get better for all of us
And Kristine- try not to feel guilty (yeah, easier said than done, I know). I am a firm believer that these things happen and it is unrelated to the meds. You did everything you could (even putting your own mental health on hold) for your LO, and you will continue to, and that is all any of us can do. He/she is lucky to have a mama who would go through so much for him/her!