CIO/Ferber .. does it work??

coachswife24 · December 2011

Ok..I'm not pro-con either way...BUT...I did let my DS who is now 6 fuss a bit before going to sleep. I would sometimes rock him, sometimes pick him up, etc. He was pretty easy to console and get to bed.

WELL...our DD who is 3 months and 3 weeks old is COMPLETELY different!! My gosh...I just let her fuss for about 3 minutes and I thought she was about to scream out her vocal chords...pick her up and she screams LOUDER and is just straight up ticked.

I love our time together - bottle, rock, then to bed...however, she has a VERY small window of the perfect tired. So if you miss it, well, we're screwed and it takes us about 2 hours to get her down. She goes from kinda tired to OVER tired really quick.

So...tell me...does Ferber really work? I'm wondering if my high needs lil girl will cry so much she'll vomit before actually going to sleep. I tried to go in this afternoon during our so called non -existent nap time and patted her belly and tried to console her and she got even more mad. Our naps consist of her falling asleep with a little fight in our arms and they only last 45 minutes. I need a SLEEP MASTER to help me out here. I feel like I need a guide or our pediatrician to be here with us during our tired times during the day and at night! Other than that...she's great!

HELP!

Oually · December 2011

We just did it for the first time tonight. DS is VERY high needs, screams the entire time he's in the car, cries until he has a coughing fit, etc. So I was reluctant but realized that he needs to learn to sleep. Tonight wasn't horrible. If you like, I'll let you know in a few days how it really turns out.

jmo866 · December 2011

I think there are cases where it may not work for certain babies, but you'd have to try to find out. Although, I'd wait a bit based on your LO's age, she is still too young, which you probably already knew. We hit a bit of a rough patch having been away for Christmas, but I think it will be fine in the long run and have seen major improvements in general and I was dealing with the exact same thing as you. It is not easy, it is very difficult to wait even the 5, 10 mins etc. before going in to reassure and check on them, but you have to be fully committed before starting or all they will learn is to cry for X number of minutes before you pick them up. That being said, there are ways to do it and maintain night feedings also, which you'd probably want to do under 6 months. GL!

missjilly1025 · December 2011

I did my own version of CIO. I put my man in his crib and he cried but I stayed with him. He is always able to see me or hold my finger. He would cry for a few moments and then off to sleep. There were times when he would cry for 10 - 15 minutes but I never left him.

He is much better now. I'm able to put him down awake and he will fall asleep on his own.

My problem with CIO alone is that if I were upset would I want to be in a dark room by myself just crying or would I want someone with me? Some may disagree but staying with him worked for us. It might take a bit longer to "sleep train" but it's worth it.

jmo866 · December 2011

missjilly1025:
I did my own version of CIO. I put my man in his crib and he cried but I stayed with him. He is always able to see me or hold my finger. He would cry for a few moments and then off to sleep. There were times when he would cry for 10 - 15 minutes but I never left him.
He is much better now. I'm able to put him down awake and he will fall asleep on his own.
My problem with CIO alone is that if I were upset would I want to be in a dark room by myself just crying or would I want someone with me? Some may disagree but staying with him worked for us. It might take a bit longer to "sleep train" but it's worth it.

If you are interested in something like this, the Sleep Lady book has a method called the Sleep Lady Shuffle, where you gradually move your chair closer to the door every few nights. There would still be some crying, but it is supposed to be a gentler approach.

CariBriel · December 2011

jmo866:
missjilly1025:

I did my own version of CIO. I put my man in his crib and he cried but I stayed with him. He is always able to see me or hold my finger. He would cry for a few moments and then off to sleep. There were times when he would cry for 10 - 15 minutes but I never left him.

He is much better now. I'm able to put him down awake and he will fall asleep on his own.

My problem with CIO alone is that if I were upset would I want to be in a dark room by myself just crying or would I want someone with me? Some may disagree but staying with him worked for us. It might take a bit longer to "sleep train" but it's worth it.

If you are interested in something like this, the Sleep Lady book has a method called the Sleep Lady Shuffle, where you gradually move your chair closer to the door every few nights. There would still be some crying, but it is supposed to be a gentler approach.

I did this with DD 1 when she was about 15 months old. She would not go to bed without being rocked and if she woke up when I layed her down I would have to start the process all over again. She was also still waking up 2 or 3 times a night just to be rocked. I started the Sleep Lady Shuffle and the first night she cried for an hour and a half, but I stayed by the crib and talked to her and tried to soothe her the whole time. The next night she cried for about 45 minutes and from there the crying time kept getting shorter and shorter and I started moving closer and closer to the door. After about a week she would go down at night without crying at all and no more waking up at night.

I think the first night was so bad because I waited so long to start sleep training. With this LO I am going to start around 6 or 8 months. It is definately hard but it is worth it in my opinion. Neither of us was getting any sleep and we were both miserable. My daughter is 5 now and sleeps great and hasn't had any negative side effects from the week of sleep training.

blckwhtyllwgirl · December 2011

Yes, it worked awesome for us. When DS was 5-6 months old, we did CIO (wait 3 minutes, 5 minutes, not pick him up -just pat, etc). It took 3 nights and then he started sleeping 12+ hours (~6:30pm-7:30am). He's been sleeping at least 12 hours a night for over a year now.

Without a doubt we are doing the same thing with DD if we need to.

SMJ1106 · December 2011

I have a very fussy, very alert and high needs baby. And have just started doing this for DD's naps. She ONLY sleeps in the swing with the hairdryer on and still fusses a bit before napping anyway... so we started the transition to the crib for naps a few days ago. The first time she fussed for about 45 minutes and then cried off and on for about 30 minutes (we went in twice and picked her up) before sleeping for a whole 3 minutes. The next time she fussed for about 20 minutes and then cried off and on for about 20 minutes before sleeping for 15 minutes. It has been gradually getting better and better. I don't worry about the short naps because she only slept about 30 minutes in the swing anyway. I haven't done this with nighttime sleep yet because that is actually going okay for us and I don't want to mess with it yet! I figure I will let her get *used* to the crib first.

I thought that it may not work for our DD since she is so needy and will just cry and cry... but it has gone way better than I expected. I realize she isn't 4 months yet - but per our pedi's recommendation she thinks she is ready.

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CIO/Ferber .. does it work??

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