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October 2011 Moms
Opinions/Thoughts on TTC again immediately
DH and I had some serious conversations last night, including budgeting, on when we want to have our 2nd (and last) LO. We made the decision to not prevent right now and seriously start trying again (i.e., charting, possibly start RE treatments again) in March. We talked about many pros/cons about TTC again rather immediately, but I was just curious what you all are considering/have considered when you make/made the decision as to when to TTC again.
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Re: Opinions/Thoughts on TTC again immediately
If finances didn't play into it, DH and I would TTC within the next 6 months.
However, daycare is super expensive and I don't know that we want to put ourselves in a position where things are that tight financially right now. We will most likely wait until DD is one and then revisit the idea, but probably hold off until she is 2 before thinking about TTC again.
Married 08/18/07
BFP 02/15/11 EDD 10/27/11 Born at 35w3d on 09/25/11
BFP 10/13/12 EDD 06/25/13 Born at 37w0d on 06/04/13
BFP 12/11/15 EDD 08/23/16 Early miscarriage
BFP 02/02/16 EDD 10/16/16
Interesting that you brought this up...
If it were up to DH, we would've started trying the day we brought C home. He, who originally said, "Let's start with one and go from there," is now overwhelmed with how much he loves C and can't WAIT to feel it all over again.
I, on the other hand, who have always wanted a big family, don't necessarily feel like having my vagina ripped in half again quite yet.
So I made HIM ask our doc at my 6 week pp checkup. I was interested to know when he thought it'd be medically safe to get KU again. He said he wouldn't recommend trying again until C was at least 8 months old, preferably a year. (Not sure if that has to do with how much I tore.)
Of course, on the way home, DH said, "I think we can toe the line a little bit... Let's start trying again in the spring." I then happily opened up my new back of BC and popped a pill.
Who knows when we'll start trying again.
Our kids are 13.5 months apart and I wouldn't change it! I love it and I'm already seeing the benefits! Check out the 2u2 board, you could get a lot of opinions there too.
This is my DH to the T! He keeps saying he can't wait for baby #2 and really wants DD to have a brother or sister. He originally wanted a boy but once he got used to the idea of having a DD and now that she is here he has decided he would be VERY happy if we only had girls. Oh how a baby changes things.
If I had tttc the first time around, I would have ttc #2 right away. I didn't have trouble till trying for #2. Having then close is tough, but I think now I shod have done that.
mine are 22 months apart and i have my list of pros and cons....
pros: DD will hopefully be potty trained by Spring, DD can play independently, DD has almost all of her teeth (still waiting on 2 top 2yr molars)--this may seem like an odd one but every child is different when it comes to teething and there were a few sleepless nights--i couldn't have handled 2 teething at the same time or a teether and a newborn, DD is old enough to listen to instructions and be my helper, DD can feed herself at the table.
cons: 2 in diapers sucks. i can't really think of any other cons.
also speak to your Dr., mine told me to try and wait 1 yr before getting KU again but i was a c section. my 2nd pregnancy was much more exhausting than my first but i was taking care of a toddler and only able to rest if she took a nap.
Me too.
Actually, the standard recommendation is 1 year because it takes that long for your body to recover (including rebuilding up your nutrient stores). Recent research has been done within the last year or do that indicates pregnancies too close together (I think it was conceiving before a year is up) resulted in higher incidences of ADHD.
As for me, we're 2 and through!
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
Emotionally/physically I know I couldn't handle 2 right away. I'm lucky enough to have one pretty easy baby, but I know that part of that is because there's just one of him. I feel like it would be exponentially difficult to deal with a new baby while trying to entertain one already around. Right now I can take advantage of his nap/wake cycle to take care of things around the house. I imagine if I had another that "free time" would be devoted to the other. His sleep patterns don't really matter now, but definitely would if I had to try to work with two separate ones. I feel like everyday we have posts asking when our LOs will STTN. Adding on another one now surely isn't going to give you any more sleep!
Biologically, and this is purely my opinion, I don't think we're supposed to have babies close together. That's why if you follow an ecological breastfeeding approach, you don't get your period while breastfeeding. Because your body isn't supposed to be having babies until the one you have is old enough to be weaned. Granted very few people follow the ecological breastfeeding approach, so periods can start back pretty early, but that doesn't mean that all the nutrients and resources used in making the baby have been replenished.
I have said it before but I love that my kids are spaced out. Don't think you have to have babies back to back so they will be close. My older 2 are 5 years apart and they play together everyday and are very close. At first when we brought my DD home I thought they wouldn't be close because he payed her little to no attention, but as she got more interactive they started to play.
I love the baby stage so it is nice to have it stretched out over a decade. The only draw back is having to buy baby stuff all over again because stuff is dated and you can not use all of it over again.
We will start trying again when DD is about a year old, we want about a 2 year age difference between them.
Seperate note, Abigail is so stinkin' cute!
My Blog
I had my first two about 15 months apart and now my third 7 years later.
Having the two close together was very hard when they were young because of finances, time, and just plain exhaustion, but as they've grown older it's been wonderful. They are each others best friend and the littler one walked. talked, and potty trained really quickly because of her big sister's influence/example.
Having this one 7 years later has proven to be WAY easier in the baby stage. Finances aren't stressed and the older children are willing and wonderful helpers. However, I imagine that may change when they're 13 and 14 and he's a six year old pest. lol
I've found either way has it's challenges and rewards.
An offbeat planning bio
Also recorded is a higher rate of autism when the next child is conceived before 1 year.
We just want to really savor our DD. I want every little thing to be special and I want to obsess over all her milestones, and I think that'll be easier for me without even really thinking about the next one.
I also know that taking care of little ones while pregnant can be so trying. We babysat my 6 mo niece when I was in first tri and I had a breakdown thinking I totally wasn't ready for a baby!
I think we'll go 2-3 years before we start thinking about another.
This would all be different if I were older. I just turned 28.
Our original plan was to start TTC again when DS was a year old. As that time was getting closer, we decided to stop using any BC around the 1st of the year. It took us a while to get pregnant with DS and we figured the same would happen with #2. We weren't going to officially "try" until his first birthday, just not prevent. Suprise suprise I got pregnant with DD on the first cycle of not preventing.
They are a little closer in age than we expected (almost 18 months), but I love it so far. We will get done with the baby stage (diapers, bottles, etc) sooner
We are not preventing right now, and will 'really' be trying come March. We would love to have them as close together as possible and my doc gave the ok too. Since I have a couple of health issues which make TTC not easy, we don't want to waste time - and if it works right away, it would be awesome.
I know it's hard to have 2u2 and all that, but I would love to get the diaper age out of the way as early as possible. If the next one is a girl, we are willing to take a break - and if not we have a third try. Daddy really wants a little girl (but is now thrilled with his little boy, it's SO adorable). I don't really care. I hated being pregnant, but I love having a baby. So...bring it on. I am ready!
This would have been exactly us (minus the SAHM part) if we did not lose Charlotte when we did. Both of us would really like to have a boy but I am not sure I want to try again just for a boy. I hate the newborn stage and am ready to be done with that, so IF we do try again, it would be right away. I had trouble conceiving my first, so I thought I would have troubles again. Obviously not as you can tell from my siggy.
It is a lot on your body and most doctors want to you wait 6mos to a year (is what I have been told) so that you can recuperate and let your heal completely.
Baby #2 - D&E - 10/1/10 @ 19w2d - thanatophoric dysplasia confirmed.
Charlotte Lillian will be forever in our hearts.
Baby #3 - Little Bean - natural miscarriage - 1/17/11 @ 5w5d
This. After seeing someone's teeth fall out from pregnancy I wouldn't try before a year.
MIL lost a tooth with each one of her pregnancies and there are 3 years between each of her 3 kids.
We were planning on stopping BC after 6mth-1year but we will see. I wouldn't having two close together as My boys are 5 years apart.
This is a slight scare for us as well as I hemorraghed pretty bad, had my doctor seriously scared, needles stuck in my legs every 4 hours and pitocin for for 24 hours,bag of blood, was stuck in the bed being poked and observed hourly. I have a blood disorder but did not see that happening since I was superwoman with my first.