Baby Showers
Can I ask them to do it earlier?
I work at a childcare facility with 100+ employees. The ladies at work want to throw me a shower which will help me out A TON. However, I just found out I will be induced in 4 weeks and they now want to do the shower AFTER baby because "its so close". Am I being rude or ungrateful if I ask them to do it sooner? I really don't have much for baby, nor the means of getting a lot.
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Re: Can I ask them to do it earlier?
It is rude to expect your co-workers to go out of their way to plan a shower on such short notice. As to the bolded part. It is not other people's responsibility to provide for your child. I'll forego the whole irresponsibilty statement that could follow, and just say that you really only need a car seat, a few clothes, some diapers and bottles (if you FF) in order to bring your child home.
I'll agree with this.
Do you have a Kid to Kid near where you live? You can get great second-hand items in excellent condition without spending a lot. I just bought a brand new video monitor system for my sister for $40. Still in the box. Retails for over $200. Goodwill is also an excellent place to pick up a few onesies. Babies where newborn clothes for such a short time that you can get really great items second-hand.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
This is unfortunately a "tough noogies" situation. You're getting a shower so suck it up buttercup, you shouldn't have planned to rely on the generosity of others to get the essentials for your baby.
Wow, what a rude remark. A lot of you also had other VERY rude remarks. You don't know the situation I am in or how I came to be there so don't Flipping JUDGE!! We had money saved up and do to some hardships with my car and other things in the last 2 months we have had to use what savings we had.
The ladies at work had originally told me they were going to be doing the shower January 7th. It was only 2 days ago that they told me they were thinking of changing it to AFTER the baby.
Yup, you're right, we don't know you. However, I do know that there are organizations that are set up to help people provide safe car seats for people who can not afford them. You're not the first or the last person to have savings deplete unexpectantly, darling. If you're that in need, there are organizations out there. Family and friends, assuming they know you're that hard off, will likely step up to the plate on their own. It's not your place to guilt trip and shake down your friends, family and co-workers for free stuff. Rude or not, you asked if it was ok for you to insist or suggest they do something they don't want/can't manage to do and it's not.
Honestly the only things a newborn really needs are: car seat, sleeping spot (bassinet/crib/co-sleeping/whatever), diapers (of whatever variety) a few onesies and food. If you're so bad off you can't afford these basic necessities without having a workplace shower, you really need to contact some sort of agency for assistance. WIC, etc.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
What would you have done if there was no work place shower? It has been my experience that co-workers rarely spend that much on gifts...or if they do get bigger ticket items they go in together and purchase one or maybe two items.
I suggest you get a carseat to get the baby home. You'll come home from the hospital with a couple of formula bottles (if you nurse you probably won't even need them) and a bunch of diapers. Pick up a few onesies and a couple of receiving blankets and you should be OK. You most likely can find really nice newborn clothes at the Salvation Army/Goodwill - like others said newborns are in them for such a short time they are like new (some actually ARE new). You might be able to find a bassinet there as well but if not they are only about $50 including the mattress. My kids were in the bassinet for over a month and they were not tiny babies (7 lbs and up).
Hopefully they will have the shower really close to your due date. If they know what you are having they can actually have the invites ready to go out. What do they really have to do in order to organize it? Almost all work showers I've attend have been put together in a matter of a couple of days...so I guess I'm not getting why they can't do it sooner. Unfortunately, that is what they want to do. If you've asked them to move it up and they refuse there is really nothing else you can do except wait.
Hang in there...it will all work out.
I only know the details you provide, but regardless, my opinion is not changed.. Its no surprise that in the course of a year you're bound to have car troubles so again this sounds like someone who hasn't planned for the inevitable. If you want someone to pander to you and blow smoke up your butt then confide in your girlfriends who sugar coat everything, if you post here you're going to hear opinions you don't like.