tyring to stay positive and happy for everyone and trying to not be the bitter infertile but it's hard. I am sitting at my desk listening to pregnancy news about 2 pregnant co-workers - 1 I already knew about but the other I didn't. The newest news is about a co-worker who is 43 and the pregnancy was a surprise - she got remarried last year and between her and her DH they have 5 children - of course I am happy for her and pray for a healthly baby but man is this hard.
The co-worker who is sharing the news doesnt know my issues but the others listening to the stories do. One of which is also pregnant and just found out 2 weeks ago. Christmas day I learned my cousin, who already has 4 kids, is pregnant again and so is DH's cousin, who also has a DS. One of my friend's sisters had a little girl today. So 2012 will be filled with babies and showers and I am fighting to stay happy for everyone as I listen to the "what's meant to be will be" comments.
Praying for us all.
Sorry for the ramble. just needed to vent - I'm done now.
Re: Difficult day...nothing but news of pregancies and births :-(
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
I'm with you. My first niece was born yesterday. I've been shopping for her since she was conceived...lol. But after the initial happiness of hearing about her arrival, I was sad and shed some tears since we've been trying and nothing has happened yet (Had a BFN on 12/24). Plus my sister-in-law was only in labor for 2 1/2 hours, wow that was lucky! Hopefully 2012 will be a good year for all of us on this board!
Yeah - I am tired of being "special". Just once, I want to be normal, ordinary and boring.
YES!!! :-)
As usual, thanks for all of the support ladies. 2012 is going to be the year for us all!
TTC #1 unofficially since 6/09, officially since 10/10
6/11 RE testing,rt tube blocked with hydro, 8/11 lap surgery rt tl
IVF#1 10/11 Estrace,450 Follistim, 15 units low-dose HCG, DHEA - cancelled (only follie growing)
IVF#2 started stims 11/4/11 - same protocol, increase in concentration of HCG, added CoQ10, no response, cancelled on CD 12
12/2/11 began accupuncture; Break in Dec. Next cycle anticipated in Jan.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome
I'm sorry you're having a rough time. And I totally hear you about the "what is meant to be will be" comment. That one just stinks.
And everyone here understands the terrible, conflicted "happy for the pg lady/sad for myself" feeling. But sometimes I think we're the only ones who do. For me, I'm finding I feel ashamed of that jealous/sad feeling, and guilty that I feel it. Man, IF screws with you!
Hope you're feeling better today. Big hug.
You are not alone is this; I feel very ashamed that I am not bursting with excitment for my BF - I am determined to not miss out on this time with her but man, oh man, is this hard! It helps to know that I am not alone and crazy regarding the way I feel.
TTC #1 unofficially since 6/09, officially since 10/10
6/11 RE testing,rt tube blocked with hydro, 8/11 lap surgery rt tl
IVF#1 10/11 Estrace,450 Follistim, 15 units low-dose HCG, DHEA - cancelled (only follie growing)
IVF#2 started stims 11/4/11 - same protocol, increase in concentration of HCG, added CoQ10, no response, cancelled on CD 12
12/2/11 began accupuncture; Break in Dec. Next cycle anticipated in Jan.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome