You just THINK your in-laws are bad! (long rant)

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

Last night I logged into Facebook only to see my step-MIL has announced the baby's name on Facebook. Mind you, we have not 100% decided on her name, we have only told close friends and family the name we're considering, and we have asked her repeatedly not to announce things before we do on Facebook. She is constantly overstepping her boundaries when it comes to my children and my SIL's children.

My husband called her out by commenting on her post and World War 3 broke out between my husband, her and my FIL.

My step-MIL has a LONG history of delusions of grandeur and saying/doing the wrong things. She has absolutely no sense of decorum or tact. My FIL further compounds this by being the biggest prick you'd ever NOT want to be around when he gets mad. To be honest, he acts like a child and lashes out.

When SIL was pregnant with her 1st, FIL wanted to take her husband's brand new $20K boat out on the water by himself and my SIL & her husband told him no, so my FIL did not speak to my SIL her whole pregnancy and did not meet my nephew until he was 6 months old because he was behaving like a child.

The argument last night ended in my step-MIL and my FIL telling my husband that they wanted nothing to do with us or this baby ever again. Instead of the attention whore b!tch admitting she overstepped her boundaries....she wins an Oscar! She did not do what she did out of excitement, she did it to grand-stand. After our loss and all we have been through, they can both go get fvcked as far as my husband and I are concerned.

My FIL is super attached to my oldest DD, and he's going to miss her because nobody who would say something so cruel and hateful about an unborn child has any right to be around any of my children.

Think I need to call about that Monster-In-Laws show...but then I would have to be around them.

stephlas8 · December 2011

Oh man. That makes my MIL look like a saint.

How ridiculous!

AshleyC0117 · December 2011

Oh. My. God.

ImThisBabysMom · December 2011

1. I can't believe MIL did that and 2. I can't believe they would say that after the fact. I agree with you. If that's how they feel then they don't need to be in your or the kids lives. Even if they didn't mean it, that's cruel. Imagine how they will treat your children when they are older if the miss have any kibd of disagreement with them.

gisa886 · December 2011

You can spin a yarn like nobody's business. That is Twatwaffle Tuesday and WTF Wednesday all wrapped up into one big ball!

adamstodrake · December 2011

What an absolute peach. I think you are way better off not speaking to them anyways!

Beener0514 · December 2011

Oh.my.gosh. I am so sorry that you and your husband have to deal with this. What a bunch of a-holes to ruin what should be a wonderful time for you guys. I am so mad at them for you! And, I feel terrible for your husband since they are his parents. My dad had super jerks for parents (they were abusive both mentally and physically and hated my mom) and when I was 4 years old, he gave them an ultimatium- accept my mother and his family or never see him again. That was the last time they ever spoke. Although I feel terrible for my father for not seeing his biological parents, he always tells us that he's better off without them and luckily, my mother's parents took him in as their own. I hope it doesn't get to this point for you and your husband but if it does, it might be for the better. No one needs drama like that, especially from people who should be so close to you. ((hugs))

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

I am just heartbroken over this! I couldn't care less if I ever see HER again, but Juliana has no other grandfathers...

LMA06 · December 2011

wow, they sound fantastic. Ugg, I'm sorry you guys are having to deal with them but good for you and DH standing up to them. It's their loss.

SoonToBeMrsDTS · December 2011

Your SMIL sound ALOT like my MIL. She has absolutely no concept of boundaries and has delusions of grandeur. I really think she has narcissistic personality disorder. When we got pregnant with DD we told our parents and siblings at 6 weeks and asked them not to tell anyone else until we announced it at 12 weeks. Within 24 hours I had an inbox full of congratulatory emails from that side of the family. DH confronted her and she said "well it's my news to share, they're my family". Of course we later found out that she was also telling everyone that DD wasn't planned (not true) , we weren't ready to have a baby (we owned a home, both had finished college and grad school, had full time jobs and no debt except for our mortgage), that we were going to be bad parents and she couldn't believe that we were making her a grandmother at 53.

DH and I have been together for 10 years and have been times that he's gone up to 6 months without speaking to her because of the way she acts. We are currently communicating with them but we don't tell her or FIL anything. They don't even know where DH works. They have been the last to know about my pregnancies and SILs, she didn't even tell them that she was pregnant with her third until she was 22 weeks. We stay in a hotel when we visit them and they stay in a hotel when they visit us. Our relationship with them has become very formal but their actions have made it impossible for us to ever be close to them.

Sorry that was such a long response!!!

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

Ugh, how dreadful! I just do not understand how someone could maliciously and intentionally hurt their own child! S-MIL has never had kids, but FIL has 5!!!!

jesbeth · December 2011

DH has a cousin and aunt like that. They did and said some things that got them dis-invited to our wedding, but beyond that, we know not to share information with them. They simply can't be trusted to keep it to themselves. It's really too bad that people like your in-laws will never ever change their behaviour or attitude. I especially can't stand to see your daughter hurt over this. She's much too little to understand.

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

I know, it's really going to suck to have to tell her she can't go see her Papaw. I certainly can't explain why to her, I will just have to make excuses for him. Crying

gisa886 · December 2011

DragonflyBelle:
I know, it's really going to suck to have to tell her she can't go see her Papaw. I certainly can't explain why to her, I will just have to make excuses for him.

That breaks my heart! I'm sorry he is such an immature douchecanoe

jesbeth · December 2011

Was FIL like this before S-MIL? I myself have had many a "wicked stepmother" come between my father and his family.

katieh1017 · December 2011

That sucks. My mil is a monster in law too. I am sorry you deal with such craziness.

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

jesbeth:
Was FIL like this before S-MIL? I myself have had many a "wicked stepmother" come between my father and his family.

Oh yes, he was that way with my MIL, apparently. S-MIL and he married when my husband was 8 or 9. They divorced at one point and then remarried.

And my H is now looking at homes and jobs for him in our other two markets where I can re-locate to without issue. He is really pissed!!!

NayNaysPlayPen · December 2011

Good Lord what a mess! Its completely their loss for not getting to participate in the childrens life if they do really want nothing to do with you all. Its a shame and I think they will one day regret their behavior. Losing out on a childs life is NOT worth her immaturity and his prickness!

BabyMakes6 · December 2011

Thats awful. The kids are the ones who will suffer because FIL/SMIL dont know how to act like adults. Shame on them. He will regret it someday.

sdasilva03 · December 2011

Not trying to make this a competition, but my in-laws are way worse. Worse to the point of starting a huge argument at our wedding rehearsal dinner, then showing up 20 minutes late to the ceremony, and then starting a fistfight with my side of the family right after the ceremony. They are mentally unstable, selfish people. I'm not an expert, but I'm pretty sure my MIL has histrionic personality disorder. They have done nothing but try to get rid of me and made DH's life a living hell for the last 4.5 years (we've been together for 5), even to the point of threatening violence against me and buying DH extravagant gifts to get him to break up with me. Anyway, my best advice is to you is to cut them out of your life. It sounds harsh, but we haven't spoken to my IL's in over a year and are much happier for it. The bottom line is, you do not need toxic, unstable people in your life, no matter how they are related to you, and your child certainly does not need to think this is an acceptable way to behave or that the behavior should be tolerated because "it's family and it's just how he/she is."

DragonflyBelle · December 2011

Oh, I agree, and I think that "one day" will come soon and he's going to learn his dang lesson this time. He doesn't get to dictate what happens with me and my children. They just think they know what a b!tch is....

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