Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
leapgirl8
member
Re: New Year's poll
1) Do you have any fun New Year's Eve traditions?
Yes. We (being myself and a friend, and Jen if she's in town) usually go out for an early dinner of Thai or Chinese, then sit on the couch, watch various coverage of Times Square, and drink Grimaces and/or pink sparkling beverages.
2) Do you have any fun New Year's Day traditions?
None whatsoever. Maybe I should invent one.
3) Best New Year's Eve you can remember?
I really can't remember anything crazy or special. Someday I would like to get a hotel room overlooking Times Square.
4) Do you have plans for New Year's Eve this year? See #1
5) How did you spend New Year's Eve as a kid? Did your parents let you stay up until midnight?
We alway spent the night with my grandma, who made us fun food for dinner and let us stay up to let the ball drop. I have very fond memories of that.
6) What is your biggest goal for 2012?
Being what Jen needs me to be to the best of my ability - as a partner, breadwinner, and parent. This is going to be a crazy hard and exciting year for us, and I just want to be there for her 100%.
7) What is your biggest hope/dream/wish for 2012 - no matter how likely or unlikely it is?
Having two healthy babies at home with us.
1) Do you have any fun New Year's Eve traditions?
Not really.Pre-kids we used to go to parties/have parties/hang out with friends. Now, it has kind of evolved as the boys have gotten older. We've done everything from hang out at home with friends, to going to our gym for 6-9pm open family night. I have to force myself to stay awake every year.
2) Do you have any fun New Year's Day traditions?
No. Mostly hang out and relax. This year a friend and her son are coming over to hang out since we haven't seen them in a long time.
3) Best New Year's Eve you can remember?
We hosted a party NYE 2004 that was great. Well, until I got horribly drunk (that was the last time that happened!)
4) Do you have plans for New Year's Eve this year?
We are surprising the kids by taking the kids to Medieval Times (dinner/jousting show!) But they will still be in bed by 10ish. No midnight for them!
5) How did you spend New Year's Eve as a kid? Did your parents let you stay up until midnight?
As a young kid I used to hang out with my BFF while our parents went to parties. As a teen I used to go to a party held by a friend at her parent's beachhouse.
6) What is your biggest goal for 2012?
Hmm..so many. Healthy living should be the top one.
7) What is your biggest hope/dream/wish for 2012 - no matter how likely or unlikely it is?
Well, I would like L to finish writing the dissertation. There is a chance she will finish by Dec 2012, but not defend until early 2013. As long as she is done writing, I don't care when she defends.
IVF Oct/Nov 2012
Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
Cautiously optimistic.
1) Do you have any fun New Year's Eve traditions? Unfortunately no
2) Do you have any fun New Year's Day traditions? Sleeping in. Does that count?
3) Best New Year's Eve you can remember? I kissed my first gf under the space needle while the fireworks were going off. That was memorable then but now not so much.
4) Do you have plans for New Year's Eve this year? Not unless I get a last minute invite. I may just stay home with a good bottle of something and watch the ball drop on tv.
5) How did you spend New Year's Eve as a kid? Did your parents let you stay up until midnight? I don't think we stayed up much. My parents are pretty square so we didn't have any parties or anything very exciting.
6) What is your biggest goal for 2012? Feel settled with life--my work and hopefully a new home for E and me.
7) What is your biggest hope/dream/wish for 2012 - no matter how likely or unlikely it is? I'd like to meet a nice girl to share my life with.
1) Do you have any fun New Year's Eve traditions?
Not really our plans change from year to year.
2) Do you have any fun New Year's Day traditions?
Usually dinner with my family.
3) Best New Year's Eve you can remember?
Any of the NYE I have spent with DW. I was pretty lost before I found her and life has just gotten better and better even on our worst of days
4) Do you have plans for New Year's Eve this year?
Game night with our closest friends. Three lesbian couples (two of which are TTC) so it will be a very sober but fun evening anyway.
5) How did you spend New Year's Eve as a kid? Did your parents let you stay up until midnight?
I used to babysit the neighbor kids from age 11 on. We would make pizzas together and stay up until midnight.
6) What is your biggest goal for 2012?
To be a rockstar student in my MSW program and hopefully continue to be the best wife I can be.
7) What is your biggest hope/dream/wish for 2012 - no matter how likely or unlikely it is? '
One word...baby!!! I dream about it constantly and have actively prayed for a BFP. I know it will happen eventually for us in some way but we are so hopeful right now.
1) We cook an elaborate dinner -- something fancier and more expensive than usual. The first year we were together, we wanted to go out somewhere nice, but didn't want to pay jacked-up NYE prices. We realized we could cook something just as good at home (my wife used to cook at one of those restaurants with the jacked-up NYE prices), so we started doing that instead. That's about it. Usually, my wife has to work NYE-day or NYD or both, so she rarely makes it to midnight and we never go out.
2) Nope.
3) Heh. A woman I had been having sort of a long-distance fling with came to town. There was a lot of drunken making out at a gay bar. This was pre-wife. It is memorable only because it is so unlike every other NYE in my life...and the rest of my life in general!
4) They're still evolving. Right now I think they involve King crab legs and my sister. We have a good bottle of champagne we need to drink before I get pregnant. Since I'm on a TTC break and therefore not in a 2WW, we'll all be enjoying that.
5) My parents had friends over and we hung around and occupied ourselves.
6) BABY.
7) See #6.
9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
*Everyone welcome*