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How is today...

lrichmond86lrichmond86 member
in Late Term and Child Loss
worse than yesterday?  Yesterday we started the day by visiting baby Gary at the cemetery for the first time.  It was really difficult to leave him there again and I cried for most of the drive to my parents house.  Luckily my three-year-old niece took most of my attention for the rest of the day and we managed to have a pretty good day.  And then I woke up this morning.  All night I had dreams about my beautiful baby or dreams about our NINE (yes, nine) pregnant friends.  Now today I'm in a funk.  I just want to sit here and be sad.  My husband has been really good about getting me up and moving when I don't feel like it, but today I'm just not in the mood.  It's like the day after the funeral.  I thought once we got through the funeral I would feel just a little bit better, and I thought the same thing about Christmas.  Guess I was wrong again.  My brain just doesn't work the way it used to.
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Re: How is today...

  • dandywarholdandywarhol member

    {{hugs}}  If you need to sit and be in a funk I think that's ok.  For me grief is like a roller coaster - ups and downs and plateaus. Sounds like you're experiencing one of the downs.  Be gentle with yourself.

     

    BFP #1 - Missed M/C, D&C 3.21.11

    BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
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    BFP  #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
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  • Petunia844Petunia844 member
    I agree, I just have really bad days, I don't think there's a rhyme or reason to when they come.  We just have a lot of sadness in us, and it has to come out.
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    Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

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  • weddedwifeweddedwife member
    I agree, grief is just like a roller coaster. I'm always surprised by what will trigger fresh grief.
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