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November 2011 Moms
One step forward two giant steps back...
This is how I feel right now with LO. She is sitting in her bouncy seat, literally snoring away, and I have cried for the 3rd time in 24 hours. Yesterday was a horrible day with her. She screamed, cried, and was very VERY unsettled the entire day. Last night, she slept from about 7 p.m. until midnight. When she woke up at midnight to eat, she was wide awake and crying until about 3:30. She would settle in, sleep for about 10 minutes and wake up again... I tried putting her down in her RnP and she wasn't having it. I sat with her in her glider and she finally fell asleep. So, my "sleep" was from about 3:30 a.m. until she woke up to eat at 5:45. During the day yesterday, she was feeding every 2.5 - 3 hours, and she NEVER does it that frequently. Last night, she slept 5 hours in between, as long as she was being held. This morning, when I fed her at 5:45 a.m., she puked up 1/2 of what she ate from the boob all over my shirt. Now, she's sound asleep.
I am tired. I am frustrated. I feel like she should be sleeping better by now. Some nights she does well and other nights (like last) she is horrible. I don't know what to do. I am not happy with BFing, I feel like I deserve to be in my own bed but I'm often either on her glider or the couch, etc. It's just frustrating.
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Re: One step forward two giant steps back...
SO frustrating! BUT eating every 2.5-3 at this age is normal, as is the sleeping situation....but the fussy-ness/spit up is not "so" normal.....and I would be very frustrated by this too! Will she sleep in her swing? I resort to putting my little girl in her swing when we get too fussy. Yesterday she was awake all afternoon, from like 2-3pm until 8pm. She took tiny catnaps, several 10 minute naps when she'd fall asleep after eating. The second I put her down to do something or try to take care of my big boys......WAAAAHHH! I put her in her swing and she'd at least sit there content for awhile!
Do you have a fast letdown? Trying to think about why she might spit up when you breast feed her.
If you are not happy breastfeeding, I hereby give you permission to quit! I had so much trouble with my first baby and it was the source of 90% of my FTM anxiety. At my 6week pp appt., my midwife told me "she gave me permission to quit" and for some reason those words felt soooo good to hear, b/c I felt like I'd be a terrible mom for wanting to quit, but she made me feel better. BUT, if you don't want to quit, you know we are all here to support you any way we can
ugh! that sounds awful. i'd cry too! maybe she's going through a growth spurt? hang in there- it definitely won't last forever!
Ditto....I mean, I think you're quite amazing over the fact you've been BF this long!
Posting from an Android sorry for any errors
I am so sorry you are having a rough time...hang in there. Sending hugs your way. I broke down and just bawled a few days ago after very little sleep for a few nights in a row--sleep deprivation is very hard on many people. DH ended up staying home that day from work so that I could sleep- I was desperate. But at almost 8 weeks, those really rough patches have become fewer and farther between and usually I am pretty functional.
My LO still eats that frequently during the day; that part is pretty normal. Put her to sleep where she will sleep and then go to sleep immediately everytime (or very soon after, I know you probably have to do laundry, etc.)--forget the house, chores, etc...only do what you have to do until you feel a little caught up. I HAD to do it that way to survive for a while. Now I feel much more capable of handling the universe and have caught up a little on the house.
If breastfeeding isn't working, change it--I had so much guilt about stopping EPing. I now pump about three times a day and supplement with formula. I am SO much happier. Part of me is tempted to give up pumping altogether, but my goal is to get through a little more of cold/flu season first, since I think I can live with what I am doing now. It doesn't make me miserable anymore. Four weeks breastfeeding is AMAZING, and don't let anyone tell you any differently. So many people act like breastfeeding is second nature, but it's not. There can be so, so many challenges. Give yourself permission to be the best mom you can be and the type of mom you want to be. I love snuggling my little guy now and I find myself much less resentful of being up and about in the middle of the night since I kind of like the way the rest of it is going. It won't last forever, and then you will miss it (I already miss my four week old baby, even though four weeks old was very challenging for us). Mommy guilt is unreal, isn't it?