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Breastfeeding
Am I overreacting? XP from August board.
So I have a friend who's LO is 5 weeks younger than mine, so almost 3 months. She insists on EBF, which I do as well, and I have always admired that about her because she hasn't had the easiest time with it. She just started work and was not able to pump enough to give to LO for the first few nights, so I gave her four bags from my stash to hold him over until she could start pumping enough.
So two days ago, I
find out that she is giving her LO "tastes" of ice cream, chocolate,
marshmallows, and just about any candy she herself eats. She admitted
that she wasn't paying attention to him while he was "licking" the
marshmallow and that when she looked down, it was gone! I told her that
chocolate is very bad (poisonous in high doses) for babies under 2, and
that I didn't think she should give the baby sugar at all. She said,
"But I want to let him experience how things taste!" Really? Com'on, he
has his whole life to taste things. He should not be eating sugar at 3
months old!!
Of course the next day, she is shocked to
discover that LO has a cold since he is "EBF." Well, what do you expect
when you give him sugar?? She's also been complaining that his tummy
hurts him a lot. Um, cow's milk in the ice cream, maybe??
Then, to top it all off, she texted me yesterday freaking out because she still isn't getting enough from pumping. I suggested that she give him one bottle of formula to give her a skipped feeding to pump, and she went off on me about how she does NOT want to give him formula, and he will ONLY have breastmilk! I couldn't help myself, and said to her that at least it was better than the ice cream she was giving him.
I come to find out that she wasn't pumping at work at all, or in the mornings, or after she got home from work. She expected to get full meals in between nursing sessions... /facepalm
Thoughts? Am I overreacting about the sugar? I just feel kind of cheated since I gave her some of my stash and she's giving him sugar and candy anyway.
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Re: Am I overreacting? XP from August board.
I come to find out that she wasn't pumping at work at all, or in the mornings, or after she got home from work. She expected to get full meals in between nursing sessions... /facepalm
I'm a little confused here - when is she pumping?
IMO the sugar and you giving her milk are two separate things. The sugar/food issues sounds to me like she's just very ignorant of infant health which is a shame for her LO. I personally wouldn't get angry about it, but perhaps help educate her in a friendly manner like, in conversation mention "oh i read blahblah about feeding".
If you need the stash for your own LO don't offer her anymore. But if you can and want to give her BM for her LO then do it. But don't do it if you're going to somehow take it as an insult if she continues to feed her LO other things.
I guess I was upset because I offered her my stash because I admired her desire to let nothing but BM be fed to her baby. It was a sacrifice for me because I had to up my pumping, but not impossible. But if she's already giving him candy, why not formula? I won't be giving her anymore of my stash.
Unfortunately what she feeds her son is none of your business. You gave your two cents, now drop it unless she asks you your opinion on the matter. I don't think you're overreacting at all; I think what she's doing is gross. FTR, giving him sugar is not going to give him a cold.
As far as your milk; don't give her any more. She's setting herself up to fail without pumping at work,she'll be giving him formula before long by the sound of it. But I don't have a clue what you mean when you describe her pumping habits so I could be off.
She sounds like an idiot, and I totally agree with you that you shouldn't give her any more of your stash unless you can really refrain from judging what else she feeds her LO. It's reminiscent of lending someone money and then getting annoyed when they spend money unwisely. You don't get to tell someone else how to use what you give them - you gave it, it was generous of you, and that's the end of it.
It was very kind of you to give her some of your milk. I can't think of anyone in my life I would do that for right now (then again, my LO is only ~11 weeks old, and I haven't gone back to work yet, so I am extremely protective of my stash).
My BFP Chart
Becoming a better role model for my daughter, one day at a time
No, I know it won't, but having sugar running though a baby's system makes them more susceptible to illnesses of all kinds. I have health problems and get sick a lot. I finally went on a diet that cuts out all sugar and I hardly ever get sick anymore, so I know it makes a big difference at least in my case. I would imagine it would make a big difference for a 3 month old, as well.
Meh, I'm not trying to be nitpicky but that's a theory not a fact. At the end of the day she shouldn't be feeding him sugar, no matter what the effects may or may not be. I hope she wises up for his sake.
This post makes me sad. I would be more concerned about the dairy than the sugar. Babies under a year can't digest cow's milk proteins which will damage the baby's stomach lining causing so many issues later on including some autoimmune diseases. Cow's milk also has too much sodium, potassium, and chloride, which can tax your baby's kidneys. She gets no pats on the back for saying "I'm going to breastfeed" and then turns around and doesn't even pump to keep up. She sounds selfish, immature and naive. I am sad for that little baby.