Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Bridesmaid 12 days post-EDD?
This is my first also, but I would say probably not. I know so many women that have had complications and if you end up having to have a c-section you won't want to be standing for that long! (From what I've heard). Or even doing a 7 hour drive with a newborn or being in a car for that long. Also, I've heard first time mom's are more likely to go a week after their due date than early too.
Just something to consider.
i would not commit to be IN the wedding, but be as big of a part of it as you can now. with the planning and other parties involved.
HOPE you can make it - but that's about it.
I agree with this! Be as involved and helpful as possible, but let her have someone else be IN the wedding. My first baby was 8 days late, and I had to have an unplanned c-section and was in the hospital 4 nights. When I was able to come home, I was pretty hopped up on pain medicine and wanted to move as little as possible. Don't commit to something (even if it is a big deal... your baby is a bigger deal... trust me!) that you can't promise to be a part of. Best wishes!
I absolutely would tell her that you can not commit to be IN the wedding, but you would love to be there if possible.
I was so uncomfortable for about 3 weeks after DS's birth, between the 3rd and 4th degree tears, pain trying to breastfeed, engorgement, yeast infection, extreme fatigue, etc....there is no way I would have been comfortable being in a wedding.
Of coarse, you may bounce right back, but I wouldn't commit fully to something that you really have no control over, KWIM!?!?
It is not fair to her to agree when you honestly might not be able to make it. I would decline.
Me: 36 DH: 40
DH dx azoospermia My dx: RA & AMA
d-IUI's--6/10, 7/13 & 8/4: all BFN
d-IVF#1--Lupron/Menopur/Bravelle/Novarel; mini-dose protocol
ER: 10/25--18R; 14F; ET: 10/28--3dt of 2 embies; 3 blasts frozen
+ HPT 11/4; Beta #1--14dp3dt: 441; Beta #2--21dp3dt: 9298
One beautiful jelly bean growing! Saw h/b on 11/28 and 12/5!!!
P/SAIF welcome
<a href="http://s22.photobucket.com/albums/b315/mandalinn/?action=view
Offer to go visit to help with invitations, a shower, wedding favors, etc, but I think making the commitment to be there, fit in a dress, and not have things leaking out of you is a bit too much. There's a great chance you could still be pregnant unless you have one of those doctors who induces everybody at 39 weeks.
12 days PP after my first child I had barely slept and was not in the mood to do much past keep her fed, eat myself, and go back to the doctor.
There is no way I would do a 7 hr drive, nor want anything to do with a wedding.
Sorry.