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Single Parents
Update from court (XP)
Hi ladies.
So court pretty much went as I expected. The judge asked how the current visitation was going and XH said he wanted more time. He sent us out for hallway mediation to see if we could reach an agreement. XH stuck to what he wanted (9am-6pm every Sunday, taking him an hour south to where he lives, with his dad driving). I stuck to what I was comfortable with, unsupervised visits at his grandmother's home or his sisters home. I even said that if he wanted to take P somewhere like McDonalds or the park, that was fine so long as his grandmother or sister drove and P had the appropriate carseat. I said I wanted the stipulation that his visitation be revoked if he failed a drug test. He did agree to that.
Since we did not agree on the visitation terms, they scheduled us for formal mediation in one month, followed by a court date one month after that. XH thinks he will have his license by that point in time so it will be fine. I don't think he realizes that child support is putting a hold on his license because he hasn't paid anything towards his arrears balance but I kept quiet about that detail. I actually said very little, other than what I would agree to or not agree to. XH on the other hand went on and on and on.
"I just want to be a father". "I've screwed up in the past, we all know this but I shouldn't be punished for that now." I'm sure all the mediator heard was "blah, blah, blah".
Anyways, I am slightly disappointed he didn't want to agree to what I proposed since I think it was fair, but I guess it was to be expected.
Thanks so much for the positive vibes ladies! You're the best!
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Re: Update from court (XP)
I am sorry that you have to keep doing back to court
I am glad that you stuck to your guns and didn't ease up on visitation. It seems like your EX is trying to be around more but he needs to understand that with his background it's going to take time. I really hope the mediator looks at him like he's crazy and tells him he should have taken you up on your offer. He needs to realize its "baby steps!" Congrats on sticking to you know is best for P. It's hard not to sway when you want everything settled.
Keep us updated.