January 2012 Moms

judgy people

So everyone is bugging me to breast feed and i am really just uncomfortable with the whole idea. My boyfriend and I discussed it and we think bottle feeding from the beginning is the best option for everyone. He will be doing feedings at night too and I know I could pump but between going to school and when I do go back to work I just don't think it is the option for us. Everyone who asks gets all mad and judgy when I tell them im not going to BF, it makes me feel like im a bad mom. Im just going to start telling them I am to get them off my back i think haha. 

 

Anyone else not BF? and getting all sorts of crap about it? 

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Re: judgy people

  • Well I myself will BF as long as I can and even go through the hassle of pumping at work as I believe that breast milk is better and has great benefits for the baby. Well if my boobs and/or baby work LOL

    That being said, I would NEVER judge somebody for feeling differently about this topic. Don't worry. That certainly does NOT make you a bad mom nor does it mean that you love or care for your child less than a BFing mom.

    I really don't like it when people are so extreme about their beliefs. I think everyone is different and nobody has the right to judge them for it!

    You are going to be a great mom!!

     

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  • I'm bottle feeding!  No one is going to make me feel bad about it.  I'm going to be miserable if I breast feed.  The way I see it a happy mom makes a happy baby.  I've talked with my OB GYN who bottle feed and she's cool with it so is my mom, husband and everyone else involved.   

    It's your choice, don't let anyone else make up your mind for you.  You are your babies mother and you know best!  Good Luck to you!

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  • I will never understand "judgey people".. As long as a baby is being fed, why does it matter if it's formula or breast milk?? Just ignore anyone that tries to make you feel bad, it's not their child. I plan on breastfeeding but if it doesn't work out for me then God help the person who wants to judge me for it lol!
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  • I will be BFing unless I end up back on meds again. I see no problem with FF. I ended up switching to Formula for DD about 4-5 months in. It will allow you and Dh a bit more freedom since your school and work schedules are going to be so tough. A friend of mine actually Cannot BF due inverted? nipples or some such. She got lots of flack for it, but it really is no-ones business.

    You can always tell people that for personal reasons, no, you cannot BF. I underline cannot because that takes the "choice" out of the situation. If they get judgey or pushy then you can get rude right back, because it is very very rude of them to be judgmental without a full story that is none of their business to begin with.

     What right do they have to:

    A~ inquire about what you do with your boobs?

    B~ tell you how to feed your child when Formula is fine according to countless Dr's.

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  • Judgy people will be judgy no matter what you do, and talking to pregnant women seems to bring out the judginess in most people, including other pregnant women and especially mothers. Doesn't make any sense but that has been my experience and it drives me crazy.

    Just to prove my point that judgy people are judgy no matter what- I've been getting tons of judgy comments because I AM going to try to BF. Apparently if you're having twins then trying to BF means you are just naive and obviously don't have a clue about what it's going to be like, etc etc. I know full well that it may not work, but there are PLENTY of women who have successfully BFed twins and I would like to try. Trust me, I have done a lot more research about this than you have, miss colleague with one baby.

    Ha! Anyway just wanted to let you know that you're not alone, and as pp said, you are making the wisest choice for your situation and formula is very healthy for babies.

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  • Ugh, I HATE when people judge on that.  BF is a lot of work.  I'm planning on doing it because I have a job that is extremely flexible with pumping breaks and I have the luxury of a lot of time to spend on it.  My hubby is staying home with our baby, so whatever I pump at work will be for the baby to eat the next day...but requires a lot of work to make sure you have enough!  If BF doesn't work, we would do formula.  BF isn't for everyone.  Some people can't even produce milk.  You do what is right for you and F*** everyone else!  :-)
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  • Definitely a schedule like yours is reason enough to bottle feed.  Like pp, I also have job that is flexible, so I plan to try breastfeeding, but if I had to bottle feed for any reason at all, I'd tell anyone who judged me to kiss my mama bear butt.
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  • I will FF this baby, just like I did with my first. I have no reason to justify my choice because it is my choice. I'm a SAHM so it's not a schedule thing at all, I just don't want to BF. It's not for me. I don't feel guilty about it and I pretty much ignore people and their judginess, there will always be something to judge, if it's not this it will be something else. 

    Do what works for you!  

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  • People can be jerks!

    I do plan/hope to breast feed as I feel its the best for my own situation but I had a friend who chose to ff right from the beginning and took a TON of heat for it. Right after she delivered she actually had a nurse reach down a grab her breast to put it in baby's mouth while she was holding him. When she forcefully moved the hand asked what on earth the nurse was doing she just said she was trying to help with the latch and tried to grab her again. wtf.

    Some people just don't seem to get that it's your baby, your body and your choice! 

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  • i plan on breastfeeding but i also dont plan on working. i know from my friends pregnancy thats its impossible to pursue anything and breastfeed at the same time. at least you plan on pumping in your spare time. anybody who judges someone for not breastfeeding should just have their own baby and do it themselves. even people who ran into complications where they couldnt breastfeed get crap for it, so you shouldnt take it to heart when people give you crap for it too.
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