Before birth of baby or after is when you start Child support proceedings!?

Re: Before birth of baby or after is when you start Child support proceedings!?

• lethalmermaid

  December 2011

  I retained an attorney and we had all the paperwork done before my DS was born.  After he was born, his dad (we weren't married) decided he wanted a paternity test (which he had to pay for).  He didn't want to come to the hospital so he wasn't on the birth certificate.  My DS has my last name.

   AS SOON AS my DS was born, we had the paternity test done and filed the paperwork.  This can be a long process, so having the discovery period done beforehand will speed it up. 

  All my planning was for naught.  He quit his job and never paid a dime.  lol

   

  Report0 Reply
• Loading the player...
• Nikkileelee

  December 2011

  tifanico:

  Using or not his last name is your decision. If don't feel comfortable with being called Mrs ex SOs last name doesn't bother you then go for it. I did it and I have had no problems but most single mother?s give their children their own last name because it might make some thing easier.

  Child support for unmarried parents follows a somewhat different procedure. Since you weren't married you have to establish paternity. It can be done in two different ways. He can sign the birth certificate AND an Acknowledge of Paternity or you have to do a paternity tests through the courts.  

  You cannot start CS proceedings before the baby is born because, well there is no an outside baby yet. However, you can go to the CS office and request all forms, get all your paper work ready and then file as soon as the baby is born. I waited around 4 months to file for it and it pretty much means I lost 4 months of CS. 

  If he wants to fight for custody, he can do it after paternity has been established. The fact that he has a good job and you are a student does play a part in custody but it is not the only thing that determines custody. I was in your exact same position.

  In terms of the steps to take now, you need to find a lawyer. He/she will tell you all you need to do and will know the laws in your state as they differ from a state to the other.  

  Have you guys discussed custody at all? Do you know if he plans to be part of the baby?s life? 

  Thanks this is helpful...so I've gotta wait then till after the baby. I see.  We haven't talked about custody. Just when we fight because of complications with our own relationship he says you better let me see my son 50% of the time. 

   

  This scared me. I realized I have to be thinking ahead to the future in case things really don't work out between us and I haven't done that. I wouldn't even know where to begin.

  I'm on MA right now. And I think they said if he doesn't claim the baby right away then the state goes after him or something.

  I think it was our plan that he signs the birth certificate and claims the baby on his insurance once the baby I born. Becuz he doesn't want them going after him when he knows he's the father. We've been together for 3 years. He's acting scared a bit about the baby saying he wanted to b established and married. But things don't always happen that way. I decided to keep the baby.  

  I would hate for things to get ugly -with the courts and all. I do know he wants to be there and be a part of his life.

  What also scares me is can he win more custody over the baby than me?  

  Report0 Reply
• jtrayers

  December 2011

  i wish i had not picked his last name for my daughter
  

  http://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee498/teagsmommy/teag.jpg

  Report0 Reply
• FyreFlyeRush member

  December 2011

  Check online with your local AG. You can probably file online. I would recommend AGAINST an Aknowledgement of Paternity because custody is established at your first CS hearing. If he acknowledges paternity at the hospital, he has the exact same rights as you, and there is nothing the police can do if something doesn't go well during visitiation.

  Name is your choice. Most states will not change the baby's name just because Dad wants it changed. And, I don't think you have to put him on the birth cert at all. The AoP and the court order are all that matter.

  It takes about a year to go through. But, he'll owe child support from day 1.

  Report0 Reply