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Parenting after 35
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My concern...

CaptainDCaptainD
in Parenting after 35

I'm not new here but haven't been on in a very long while so I am not sure how many responses I get but I needed to find an anonymous-ish type place to talk about this since I can't talk about it with friends or family right now.

I have a two year old and now I am wondering if I might be pregnant.  I'm trying not to stress about it too much until next week but I definitely have all the signs.  Were we trying?  Not actively.  But, honestly, we weren't preventing a lot of times either.

Along with all of the usual concerns that go along with another baby (expenses, lack of sleep, my age - 40 in Jan) my biggest concern is how my two year old will deal with it and if she will feel slighted.  She and I are so incredibly tight, I don't want her to feel like we don't have that connection if I have another baby.  That truly is what is weighing on me the most.

If any of you could offer advice, reassurance or any feedback, I would really appreciate it.  If I didn't explain myself well enough, just let me know.  I'm pretty tired right now...

Thank you mommas!

 

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Re: My concern...

  • BrideBuddiesBrideBuddies member

    I'm a mom of one, but I'm pretty sure your 2 year old will adapt to having a new little brother/sister in the house.  Don't overthink this!  

    People have second (or third or fourth) children all the time.  How often do you hear of a family adding a child and NOT making things work for them?  Never.    Will it be a hard transition?  Probably.  But all change is difficult.

    And when it comes to worrying about your age.. you get no sympathy from most of us who are well into our 40s here!  :)     Didn't you hear... 40 is the new 30.

    You've been handed a gift.  Celebrate it!  And hopefully it's a big CONGRATS!

     

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  • gimmietimmiesgimmietimmies member
    imageBrideBuddies:

    I'm a mom of one, but I'm pretty sure your 2 year old will adapt to having a new little brother/sister in the house.  Don't overthink this!  

    People have second (or third or fourth) children all the time.  How often do you hear of a family adding a child and NOT making things work for them?  Never.    Will it be a hard transition?  Probably.  But all change is difficult.

    And when it comes to worrying about your age.. you get no sympathy from most of us who are well into our 40s here!  :)     Didn't you hear... 40 is the new 30.

    You've been handed a gift.  Celebrate it!  And hopefully it's a big CONGRATS!

    Um, hey! Embarrassed

    40 is the new 30! 2 year olds adjust a lot easier than a 13 year old... they're still learning too. I found it harder when ds was 5 and T was born. Talk about nose out of joint. He lived. Even now, he grumbles, but he's pretty tight with his sisters too. As for the girls, they go with the flow. There will always be sibling rivalry, but I dare anyone to cross one of them.

    Bridebuddies is right, it is hard work, but it does work. You'll just have to find your balance with two. Congrats!

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  • mwdmwd member

    First off, hopefully, congratulations are in order.  You are a good mommy for being concerned about your LO, but she will adapt. DS was just 2 when his sister was born and we did struggle with some attention getting antics. But she will adapt and soon she will love the new baby !

     

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  • ntyravgmomntyravgmom
    I had concerns for my eldest when I became pregnant with my lo. What helped us was to play up the big sibling fact. I even signed him up for a siblings class at the hospital I delivered at. I bought him a baby doll that he could name and take care of while mommy was caring for the baby. Also, the things he learned in the class encouraged him to be a mommy's helper when the baby was born. He would bring me diapers, etc. when asked. Now they play together great.
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  • steverstever member
    I'm pregnant but am trying not to worry about how DS will feel until I'm further along. He's a very sweet, nurturing boy - good to other kids and animals - so I'm hoping that will carry over into how he treats his sibling.

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  • jenlb03jenlb03 member

    Try not to worry about that at all! Adding a second child only makes the family that much better! You will never lose that connection to your first child, you will just have a connection to another one. Having two kids is awesome.

     

    Jen
    Mom to Ava 12.21.04 and Austin 10.22.06
    BFP 12/5/11...natural m/c 12/23/11 Pregnancy Ticker
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