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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
Other ladies whose ute is on lockdown- I need you
So I have ALWAYS wanted my kids close together, and I planned on TTC again when G was 6mo. At that time H did not have a job (still doesn't) and for several other reasons it was a bad idea. I was devestated both at postponing TTC and having to go back to work.
Now, almost 5 months later, I love my job; my schedule finally makes sense, I see my friends regularly and we are okayish financially. Well H had an interview yesterday which he said went REALLY well and they set up a second interview. I should have been so relieved when he told me but my first thought was "Oh god, I'm not ready yet" followed by intense guilt that if he gets the job, deciding to TTC will be on me & if I decide to wait because I'm not ready- is that fair to G & H? Ugh, please tell me I'm being ridiculous. Please.
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Re: Other ladies whose ute is on lockdown- I need you
You are being ridiculous.
If you aren't ready, you aren't ready, and TTC when you aren't ready is NOT a good idea. Thinking that you wanted your kids close together, when you were single, or newly married, or pregnant, is totally different than DECIDING to have your kids really close together. DS and DD are 2 years 9 months apart and I LOVE that age gap. DS was old enough to be helpful, and every time he sees his sister, he has to give her hugs and tell her how cute she is. If TTC is on you, then say to DH exactly what you said here- your schedule is good, and you don't feel the need for another baby right now. You will, and when you do, that is when you should TTC. Good luck!
Unless you WANT to have another child now, then dont do it. Being "okay-ish" financially isnt exactly a beacon of light for adding to your family, either. Wait until you WANT to start TTC again and when you're ACTUALLY financially stable. Forget your perfect child spacing- it's only perfect if you're ready for it.
I meant we are okay-ish with out him working, we could do it if he got a job. I get what you're saying though; even with his job we'd still have to wait to pay some stuff down and lose all the crdit card debit.
Thank everyone, I needed to hear that. I feel weird about changing my plans I guess.
We would be fine to start TTC now. In fact, H asked a couple weeks ago when we going to. I almost stabbed him. We originally planned to TTC #2 when DD was 6 mos. Well, fast forward through emergancy c/s, DD being high needs, severe PPD and I am still SO not ready. I told H that when K was 1, we'd revisit the idea and consider it then. Financially, we'd be ok, but the way I see it, no job or financial status is ever permanent or guaranteed so it's a consideration for us but not a deal maker or breaker. That being said, we don't have much debt and we minimized expenses before K to make sure we could afford me SAH. If H lost his job, we'd 'manage' until he or I found another.
Life with Blog
Don't feel bad about changing your plans. DH and I had planned to have another one close to when DD turns 2. When we actually talked about it, that means that we would have to start TTC THIS SUMMER! It scared the heck out of us that it was so soon. We aren't done enjoying DD yet. Though I really miss being pregnant and I want to have another one sooner than later, we totally changed our game plan. Now the plan is to start TTC after she turns 2. Who knows...maybe it'll change again before we get there:)
I know it's hard to change your plans but don't feel guilty. If you aren't ready, you aren't ready:)
BFP 6/1/14 -- Blighted Ovum: 7/9/14 -- D&C: 7/10/14
I still can't get over the fact people want children this close in age. I would be ripping my hair out and running into walls.
Don't get me wrong, I loved being pregnant and I loved and do love A, but my god I'm not ready for that again. Women who can handle the 2u2 are amazing.