How do you find time...

ssull1974 · December 2011

To do anything! For those of you who's children are older, when (if ever) did you feel like you settled into a routine? I feel like right now, I am constantly on the go (I get up at 4:40 am and go to bed at 9:30 pm and never stop. I work from 7:30 to 4 so the rest of the time it's getting myself ready for the day, getting LO ready, work, get home and try to get some housework done or exercise (which I miss terribly) then get supper ready, clean up from dinner, bath time, bedtime, get myself ready for bed then go to bed and start all over. That is with help from DH in the evenings! Will I have more time once LO weans from BF and I'm not spending hours a day feeding him or pumping?

Of course I wouldn't give it up for anything (that goes without saying I suppose) but what I wouldn't give to be able to shower in the morning instead of at night and to fit in exercise every day! Sorry for the vent, but I would love to hear when others felt like things settled a bit for them.

aglenn · December 2011

Well, things change a lot as your LO moves from one phase to the next. DD is two and I can't say things have really "settled down," though. It's kind of a work in progress and what works this month probably won't next month. I just have to be flexible with it and go with whatever works. Sometimes I work out in the early, early (4am) morning, sometimes after DD is in bed, sometimes on my lunch break at work. It changes all the time based on what works best, and I feel like much of our daily routine is always a juggling act. I have heard that once the youngest is 3, things are more sane...and once the youngest is 5 you can really start to feel like you have a normal routine. We'll see if that's the case.

brandenburdett · December 2011

Honestly, when I look back at the first year it is a complete blur and I'm not sure what I did. Work and rush around at home a lot, then collapse in bed.

Having said that, I found it got 'easier' after the first year. I stopped pumping, we all had the routine down, and she was sleeping pretty regular hours. I'm sure every age/stage will bring new challenges too!

mwd · December 2011

yes, you will find time to be an adult again, as your LO becomes more independant (sorry to break it to you but it does happen). Hopefully you will feel the energy to go out and have a life, exercise, etc. It does get better, otherwise people would not go on to have more! Good luck!

ateytelb · December 2011

It does get easier once the 1st year is over (no more BFing/pumping, LO sleeps better). I work out during my lunch hour at work: we have a gym with classes there. We use disposable dishes so I don't have to clean a lot after dinner. After my LOs go to bed, I do my own stuff (reading, Internet etc.) from 9:30 to 11:30.

PinkNoise123 · December 2011

I've been wondering the same thing as OP, and I'm a SAHM! Hats off to you ladies who work and raise your kiddos. I'm amazed at what you accomplish every day!

stever · December 2011

DS is almost 2.5 and I still bathe at night half the time. Things have settled down, but I also find that I've gotten used to having less time to do things. It's just a new reality.

LauraLynneC · December 2011

3 kids: DD17, DS16, DS4.5months

what helps us:

DD17 & DS16 are VERY independant - ride the bus, keep their own schedules, help with housework/meals/etc.

We have NO schedule. It's catch as catch can. Some days baby gets a bath, some days a shower, some days he just smells like a baby... Dinner is as early as 5:30, as late as never - help yourselves everyone, you know where the fridge is. I do once a month cooking with a group (let me know if you want details on how we run it) but essentially I spend 3 hours cooking 15+ meals for the month eliminating those "what's for dinner" quandries.

I have almost ZERO down time. I'm on the go from when I step out of bed until I fall back into it at night. I facebook/internet from my phone during my commute or while I'm nursing but actually sitting down at my home computer is limited to about 30 min a WEEK now. And TV? I listen to Hulu at work but otherwise I don't get much tube time either.

There's a lot that goes undone. My standards are lower. I expect more from the older kids and I ask DH for help when I need it (he steps in when asks but otherwise assumes I've got it under control). I let go of "control" - he washes bottles and diapers differently than me but gets it done. I've learned to let him do it his way. My house isn't spotless. I've just hired a housekeep to make sure "hoarders" doesn't show up on my doorstep. There are compromises but, as the old sayings go: the cobwebs will still be there, your baby grows up.

And mostly I know it's not this busy forever. With one child on the verge of moving out (just thinking about it makes me teary, even on days when she's a pain in the butt), I'm more appreciative of even the busy/hectic times with my kids. It goes to fast.

We have a saying at our house to remind us of that: "cherish the challenges" - meaning that even while it feels hard right now, we will miss this age/stage/season. Try and breathe as much as possible. You will look back fondly on these times and probably even hold your shoulders a little higher knowing you got through it.

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