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Presents for in laws?
Is it just me, or is everyone else totally responsible for presents for ILs? I'm talking birthdays, Christmas, etc. I don't even get a "hey, maybe my mom will like X as a gift." I'm expected to think of what to buy, buy presents, write out the cards, ship, etc. And my MIL is the kind of person, that if she doesn't like the gift, she gets rid of it right away. I'm so stressed out with everything else, that I'm getting a little resentful about this.
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Re: Presents for in laws?
Yep. I am. And, I used to stress about how much I was spending and ask him how much he wanted to spend, etc., but now I just do it. I figure if he was concerned about the cost he could participate in buying the gifts.
Sorry you are stressed, dear.
Yuck, I'd be screwed if I had to pick out the ILs christmas presents. Thankfully DH and SIL buy a joined gift each year from the 4 of us, so I get to stay out of it.
I have a hard enough time with my parents! Have you thought about something more consumable? Like a gift cert for mani/pedi, or tickets to a play/event, etc? That's what we usually end up doing for our ILs.
DH's parents have commented that he mysteriously now remembers to send them cards and call them for their birthdays.
Not only do I do all gifts for DH's relatives, but I also buy the presents that DH "gives" to me. And wrap them. He usually doesn't even know what he is giving me until I open the present in front of him. I fought this for a long time, but I gave up and he is quite happy that I take care of all gifts, including whatever he is "giving" me.
I'm sorry you are stressed about this. The holidays can be very difficult and stressful.
Oh yeah, I pretty much do it all. Sometimes DH will get a wild hair and see / think of something he wants to get someone. Usually, though, I'm the one doing the shopping / wrapping / shipping.
I compensate by messing with the gift budget so that someone I don't like gets a $10 gift and then I re-assign the rest of the money to the gift of someone I do like. It's kind of like my own version of Santa's naughty / nice list. DH has no idea that I give based on a merit system.
Married October 28, 2006, TTC since March 2009 IUI #1-8 w/ clomid = BFN
IVF # 1 May, 2011 = BFP!!! Stillbirth at 26 weeks (placental failure/severe IUGR)
FET #1 February, 2012-- BFP! Beta #1=84 Beta #2= 207 Beta #3= 3,526
Our Rainbow Baby is on the Way!
Me too. I'm in charge of all the gifts AND sending birthday cards : I don't care as far as most of the family as we usually send around wish lists, and like LLCG, I just don't involve DH - I just take care of it. It's MIL that's the hardest to shop for. This year she actually asked for something. A M.F'ing LAPTOP.
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! I told DH he could do whatever he wants on this one, but it's all on him. I'm sure he'll get her one so that she'll actually try to interract with her grandbabies and finally see pictures, but $10 says she'll use it once (when we're there) and then she'll forget how. Then play the victim card that she has no one there to help her with it. Then it will be our fault that we got her a laptop.
Can you tell I'm bitter?
The ILs usually end up with no gift, because I refuse to take on that task. They are DH's family - it's his responsibility to get them something if he so chooses. And he can deal with the fallout if they get mad/hurt.
I gave up on caring about presents/acknowledgements after they chewed me out for *writing* thank yous the first year we were married. I'm much happier not caring.
I'm lucky in that DH will think of gift ideas with me, but we BOTH do this.
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