How well are your kids behaved in stores

Zenya · December 2011

Let's say for example you took your 3 and 5 year old children to Target. Would you have to correct their behavior? how many times?

Assume you are there for 45 minutes.

Jodi&Joe · December 2011

I would have to talk to them no less than 162 times in 45 minutes.

DandelionMom · December 2011

My 5 y/o still needs at least one reminder in Target, mostly when we're in line to pay. And I usually still go over the expectations with her before we enter ("inside voices, stay with mom, walking feet, no begging").

lsufan · December 2011

It depends on the day. Sometimes they don't listen to anything I say and/or beg for toys that we're not buying. Or they want to get in the cart, out of the cart, in the cart, out of the cart, etc. Other times, they're well behaved, for the most part.

bebemama · December 2011

It COMPLETELY depends on the day. Their behavior varies from complete angels to pretty darn bad.

shouldbworkin · December 2011

Depends on the time of day and incentive for good behavior at the end. Later in the day = more likely to annoy theshit out of each other. But, they like Target and I can usually buy some silence by a stop at Starbuck's/Food court to get them a drink/snack when we start. Regardless, after about 20 mins, all bets are off. And, since one of my kids always need to take a poop while we're at Target for some reason, we're never out of there in under 20.

joseysbride · December 2011

Depends on the time of day. If it is in the morning or shortly after nap and I bring them a little snack to keep them occupied for the first 10ish minutes, we are good to go. I usually only have to remind Rory to hang onto the cart a time or two and scold C for trying to push the buttons on the credit card thing at the end.

If it around lunch time or after I pick them up from school and daycare, it is a complete disaster. C is kicking R, R is asking for a million things, C is screaming as he is trying to unbuckle himself so he can jump out, R is asking for a million things.

We do not go to Target at lunch time or after school unless we have no diapers. LOL!

Zenya · December 2011

At the end of our trip today I told them I wasn't taking them out together again for a month. I fear that I have unrealistic expectations though. I think we were there for too long and they were hungry. Alone, they are FINE. Sara and I go out all the time when Christopher is at school (he is in half day, afternoon kindergarten). Christopher was so upset by my 'consequence' but perked up when I said we could go out alone on the weekends. IDK. I am pissed off. It's just constant bickering, riling each other up, today there was 'poop talk', grabbingshit from racks etc.

I told Christopher he had to hold it together for the 5 minutes it would take to get to the register and he literally fuckedup within 60 seconds. I find it SO ANNOYING.

CleoKitty · December 2011

Depends on the day, but usually they're pretty good. I do have to give my younger dc very frequent reminders to stay with me, not to grab things off of shelves, etc. Last night we went to the grocery store and dd wanted to walk instead of riding in the cart. Then both kids wanted to push their own little kiddie-sized cart. They needed lots of verbal reminders/reinforcements to stay to the right, to not ram the cart into my heels, etc. but overall they did really well. We didn't hit a single stranger, LOL, so I consider it a success.

There may occasionally be some bickering but it's relatively minor and they can be redirected without too much trouble. Poop talk happens too, but luckily dd's articulation is such that no one ever understands her anyhow.

I really don't think it has anything to do with my stellar parenting though, I really think I just lucked out with fairly easy-going and compliant kids. Another reason we're done with two kids- I'm certain that the odds are stacked against us now and the third kid would be bound to have a different personality.

AZ_Erica · December 2011

Target. They would probably be fine. I may have to ask them to put something back or keep up, but I would make sure we spend time shopping and looking at toys so they would like that.

Now if I were to take them to the post office we would be there a total of 5 seconds before I needed to correct their behavior.

ridesbuttons · December 2011

Zenya:

At the end of our trip today I told them I wasn't taking them out together again for a month. I fear that I have unrealistic expectations though. I think we were there for too long and they were hungry. Alone, they are FINE. Sara and I go out all the time when Christopher is at school (he is in half day, afternoon kindergarten). Christopher was so upset by my 'consequence' but perked up when I said we could go out alone on the weekends. IDK. I am pissed off. It's just constant bickering, riling each other up, today there was 'poop talk', grabbingshit from racks etc.

I told Christopher he had to hold it together for the 5 minutes it would take to get to the register and he literally fuckedup within 60 seconds. I find it SO ANNOYING.

This was me about a month ago when I went to a Target-like store to pick up a few things. Disaster. I was that mom scolding my kids, younger one screeching, older one tormenting....

I scolded them in the car for a solid 5 minutes telling them how embarrassed I was and how they were NOT coming to the store with me any more if they were going to act like that (3 and 4 years old).

I seriously went home and had a drink, I was so wound up.

WBs_Bride · December 2011

I told my girls (also 3 and 5 at the time) that I wasn't taking them out with me anymore either after their antics at a shoe store in October. Ridiculous. Today was the first time we've gone together, all 3 of us, to a store since. Ironically, a shoe store! They needed shoes for their Christmas dresses. They were good today. But I feel your pain. It's too much freaking hassle to have them all there, grabbing things, in and out of the cart, bickering, asking when we're done, etc, etc. I do most all of my shopping at night, alone. I prefer to shop alone anyway (not just without kids--but without anyone).

Arnegard · December 2011

Probably the same as Jodi. Stick out tongue

Honestly, I was in Target today and it was dead. I let Taylor touch packages, run a few aisles ahead, etc. She wasn't loud, disturbing the boxes - she was just excited about all the Christmas stuff around.

Arnegard · December 2011

shouldbworkin:

since one of my kids always need to take a poop

Freakin' hilarious! This is my Taylor FOR SURE! Getting in the van leaving the library, at a store... anywhere!

squishywife · December 2011

150 times each they would need to be reminded "dont touch that" "stay with me" "leave your coat on" "leave your shoes on"

And actually, if I were just taking my big girls somewhere...they aren't terrible...rarely have tantrums (in public).

I still don't want to take htme anywhere!

CleoKitty · December 2011

Arnegard:
shouldbworkin:

since one of my kids always need to take a poop

Freakin' hilarious! This is my Taylor FOR SURE! Getting in the van leaving the library, at a store... anywhere!

Absolutely! I swear that my dd has taken a dump at nearly every single public restroom in town.

J&A2008 · December 2011

Jodi&Joe:

I would have to talk to them no less than 162 times in 45 minutes.

This. But one kid alone? Totally golden. It's when you're outnumbered that things get tricky.

Susie2005 · December 2011

Mine are better than this. I might only have to talk to them 161 times.

Yodajo · December 2011

J&A2008:
Jodi&Joe:

I would have to talk to them no less than 162 times in 45 minutes.

This. But one kid alone? Totally golden. It's when you're outnumbered that things get tricky.

I agree with this. Together, they can be a lot to handle, particularly if I'm distracted, which I always am there.

Alone though? They are complete dreams and a pleasure to shop with.

Mrs Manners · December 2011

I still make ds ride in the cart. When he's in the cart he's awesome. I give him a toy to play with and he plays with it while we are in the store and doesn't cry when I make him put it back when we leave. If we aren't in a toy store, I can give him my phone and he'll happily play with it while I shop. I've tried to do a few quick runs without the cart and they are a disaster.

eclaires · December 2011

Mine are usually fine together, unless they are tired or hungry. But they don't bicker at all. It's kind of hard for a 5YO to bicker with a 15m old, lol, considering her speech consists of babbling, yelling out "DOG DOG DOG DOG" when she sees one and screeching.

We went the other day after school b/c I had no other option and Jackson whined through the whole (very short) trip, but he wasn't really bad. He just sat in the cart and annoyed me with whining about going home. He's also really good about staying with me if he doesn't ride in the cart.

I do like to bribe him with gummy bears or something equally bad for him, though. Like, "if you keep your sh*t together I will buy gummy bears."

GinandTonic · December 2011

Yodajo:
J&A2008:
Jodi&Joe:

I would have to talk to them no less than 162 times in 45 minutes.

This. But one kid alone? Totally golden. It's when you're outnumbered that things get tricky.

I agree with this. Together, they can be a lot to handle, particularly if I'm distracted, which I always am there.

Alone though? They are complete dreams and a pleasure to shop with.

Why the hell is it that they're so much better by themselves? Even eating out - DD is an ANGEL and I like having lunch just the two of us.

I very rarely take them both to stores together anymore, but either one alone is fine. If I had to do Target with them both, it would depend on the day, but they'd be ok. More than anything, they'd start fighting about something between the two of them.

ccm1203 · December 2011

Together? They would be ok for about 5 minutes if I am lucky. Both my kids are great to shop with alone with though.

peekaboo716 · December 2011

I'd say more often than not, my kids are in the Jodi camp. Lots of reminders/corrections/talking to them thru clenched teeth because I am at my wit's end. *sigh*

karen6784 · December 2011

eclaires:
Mine are usually fine together, unless they are tired or hungry.
I do like to bribe him with gummy bears or something equally bad for him, though. Like, "if you keep your sh*t together I will buy gummy bears."

I almost spit my drink out! LOL For us, it is a treat from Starbucks. Sometimes I need to be reminded to keep my sh*t together!

gracendantho26 · December 2011

Jodi&Joe:

I would have to talk to them no less than 162 times in 45 minutes.

At that age ITA with Jodi. Honestly though DS still is a big whiner about shopping so I try not to bring him with me...he whines like DH whines shopping. DD loves to shop so she's my shopping companion.

Hiiiiiii Jodi!! I saw your post the other day. We are doing great! The kids are in 3rd and 1st grade and they are doing really well!

winomom22 · December 2011

DD1 has ADHD so not very well. I can lay out the expectations before we go into the store, but she can't resist the impulse to touch things and play with sh*t. She can't stop moving so waiting in line to check out can be torturous. DD2 is always grabbing sh*t out of the cart and throwing it on the floor because it is fun for her. I am exhausted after a trip to the store with both girls. I try to keep trips short and if I can, try to go alone or as an entire family with DH or with just one child.

MrsStubbs · December 2011

5yo DD is great when we go shopping, love her. 2yo DS turns into the devil everytime we go to the store. I never take him unless I have no other option.

Zenya · December 2011

CleoKitty:
Depends on the day, but usually they're pretty good. I do have to give my younger dc very frequent reminders to stay with me, not to grab things off of shelves, etc. Last night we went to the grocery store and dd wanted to walk instead of riding in the cart. Then both kids wanted to push their own little kiddie-sized cart. They needed lots of verbal reminders/reinforcements to stay to the right, to not ram the cart into my heels, etc. but overall they did really well. We didn't hit a single stranger, LOL, so I consider it a success.
There may occasionally be some bickering but it's relatively minor and they can be redirected without too much trouble. Poop talk happens too, but luckily dd's articulation is such that no one ever understands her anyhow.
I really don't think it has anything to do with my stellar parenting though, I really think I just lucked out with fairly easy-going and compliant kids.

That's not all that dissimilar to how we do and kind of reinforces my opinion that I have an attitude problem.

Jodi&Joe · December 2011

Zenya:
CleoKitty:

Depends on the day, but usually they're pretty good. I do have to give my younger dc very frequent reminders to stay with me, not to grab things off of shelves, etc. Last night we went to the grocery store and dd wanted to walk instead of riding in the cart. Then both kids wanted to push their own little kiddie-sized cart. They needed lots of verbal reminders/reinforcements to stay to the right, to not ram the cart into my heels, etc. but overall they did really well. We didn't hit a single stranger, LOL, so I consider it a success.

There may occasionally be some bickering but it's relatively minor and they can be redirected without too much trouble. Poop talk happens too, but luckily dd's articulation is such that no one ever understands her anyhow.

I really don't think it has anything to do with my stellar parenting though, I really think I just lucked out with fairly easy-going and compliant kids.

That's not all that dissimilar to how we do and kind of reinforces my opinion that I have an attitude problem.

It's all about perspective right?! LOL

Because, like you Z, I read Cleo's post and think "that's what it's like with my kids too!" And yet her perception is that it's a success. Mine is such that I want to strangle the little devils and/or put them up for sale (I'll pay you. NO, really. I'll pay you!) in aisle 10.

Apparently you and I need some anger management classes! Wanna go together?!

Zenya · December 2011

yes!! totally

shouldbworkin · December 2011

Zenya:

At the end of our trip today I told them I wasn't taking them out together again for a month. I fear that I have unrealistic expectations though. I think we were there for too long and they were hungry. Alone, they are FINE. Sara and I go out all the time when Christopher is at school (he is in half day, afternoon kindergarten). Christopher was so upset by my 'consequence' but perked up when I said we could go out alone on the weekends. IDK. I am pissed off. It's just constant bickering, riling each other up, today there was 'poop talk', grabbingshit from racks etc.

I told Christopher he had to hold it together for the 5 minutes it would take to get to the register and he literally fuckedup within 60 seconds. I find it SO ANNOYING.

Pretty sure I banned my kids from the mall when they were 3 and 5 b/c they behaved so badly. I still don't take them there together unless it's a quick in and out.

jlw2505 · December 2011

We do this exact trip almost every week as that is where do our grocery shopping. 9 times out of 10, my kids are really great. We get the carts that have the kids seats in the front - the newer version of the kids cart and I think it is 100 times better than the older Target ones. The kids get a free cookie when we go and then they entertain each other, they help us get things from our list and we just keep them busy. Every so often we have a hard trip but they know if DH or I need to correct their behavior more than once, that person has won a trip to sit in the car for a few mins as a time out. My kids love Target and have fun going - they enjoy watching the people and helping us pick out our food and whatever else we are getting. We do time our trips for when we know they are not over tired or hungry which helps and when we go on Sunday's, they often have food samples out and my kids love that.

Jodi&Joe · December 2011

I also wanted to add, 3 and 5 are TOUGH ages for these situations.

Joey and Cam, at 7 and 5, are definitely better. Don't get me wrong. I still have to redirect/correct/grit my teeth more often than I would like. But they are better.

UGAbride · December 2011

Mine are not that great, but Target is our best outing, of all the options out there. If I go in with a list (this is no time to try and pick out a card, LOL!) and I am grabbing things I need, then I will reward them by letting them look at the toy aisles if they behave. I put the baby in the cart (in her carseat), and DS #2 still has to sit in the cart till we get to the toy section, and DS #1 has finally gotten to where he will stay with me somewhat so he can walk. Allowing them BOTH to walk is a complete disaster though. They do pretty good in the toy section though, because they know if they can't see each other (and I just follow them around) then I'll leave right then and there. Checkout is a disaster though, DS #1 is always begging for candy and DS #2 starts standing up in the cart and I can't get outta there fast enough! And someone always has to poop, and if it's DS #1 we will be in there FOREVER.

acppa · December 2011

DD would sit in the cart and be fine.

DS, 4 yrs old, would have to be told to sit down, stop touching things, no screaming, stay beside me, don't put things in the cart, don't run away from me about 50 times in 45 minutes.

Although at Target I bribe him with popcorn and he does ok. The last time we were there he threw a hissy fit about wanting some kind of toy and ran 4 aisles away from me, then proceeded to cry "I want that toy" the whole time we were checking out. If I didn't really need diapers I would have dragged him out of the store kicking and screaming.

shopgirl78 · December 2011

I am usually okay with DD and DS1, 6 & 4 respectively. I try to find something to get them excited about and all out bribe them at times. Both walk and I don't mind if they go to the next isle...I want them generally in my sight. It's when I add #3, DS2, that $hit goes to hell. DS2 and anybody is tough but DS1 moreso...something about getting 2 boys together.

I once took all three to go get a new cell phone, it was PURE torture...the alternative tho was to go without for 48 hours....

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