Single Parents

Exe's significant other(s)

Sorry I feel like I keep posting but im new to all this and need as much advice as possible. My ex plans to be in my daughter's life which is fine but right now he is talking to and possibly involved with someone (we broke up 3 weeks ago), for those of you whose exes are involved in your children's lives how were you when it came to your exes signficant others/partners/dates etc. being introduce to your children? He has made a point of saying that if he wants our daughter around this girl then he will and that he would introduce us beforehand, he can date who he wants and whore all over the city for all I care but Im just not okay with introducing my daughter to everyone (even if I meet them) that comes along just because he "thinks" it will work, and that includes when I start dating again. I read on another forum where someone said third party involvement such as girlfriends etc. unless married can be prevented from being involved in the child's life, is this true? Can this be agreed upon in writing legally?
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Re: Exe's significant other(s)

  • I would actually be interested in this too...I never even thought of that..
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  • You can voice your concerns with your ex, but who he introduces LO to on his visitation time is up to him. Having a claus in writing stating that you can't bring anyone around LO until after marriage is ridiculous. How will you ever meet and spend time with someone? I want to make sure the person I end up with loves DS as much as I do and you can't get bonding with strict stipulations. 

    On the other hand, you can have your agreement state that there can't be any overnight visits from the hours of 7pm til 9 am or something like that, but remember, it goes both ways.  

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  • Yeah, I worried about this at first but not so much anymore. I think once the jealousy etc wears off as time goes by you won't worry about it so much. You definitely don't want to put anything in a court order that would restrict you as well.
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  • I understand the concern, I have it too, however you really can't do much about it.  Just be the consistent parent and help LO to adjust.  You can ask that he and his SO limit the PDA in front of LO and that you hope he will be respectful on how hard it is on a child to have attachments form to people and then have them out of LOs life when things don't work out.  
  • There is such a thing called "morality clause"  which prevents the other parent from having girlfriends/boyfriends spend the night while children are present.  I believe that they have mutally agreed upon.  However, because of domestic violence issues involved, I do have a clause in my divorce/custody papers which prevents my ex from exposing our daughter to any romantic adult relationships he is involved in.  In fact the judges for the family and criminal courts approved the Orders. 

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