If you rotate Christmas

cookiemomstarr · December 2011

How is the holiday shared or rotated. DH's CA with BM states one person has SS Christmas eve until Christmas Day 1:30pm. The other parent has SS Christmas day 1:30 pm until 6:00 pm Christmas night.

It turns out Christmas falls on our weekend. We are to have SS Christmas day this year. Since the parent who has the child on Christmas day has to "return" the child to the parent whose day it is at 6pm, I believe Christmas Eve start time should be 6 pm to 1:30 pm Christmas day. To be fair.

Thoughts?

sabrina69barnes · December 2011

DH and BM live 2 hrs apart and meet halfway for exchanges. One parent get the kids from the day school lets out until Dec 26th at 9 am. The other parents gets the kids Dec 26th until Jan 2nd. If either parent want to have the kids on Christmas day when it's their year to get them on the 26th they can drive all the way to pick them up at 1pm but have to give the other parent a week notice.

wintersnight20 · December 2011

In ours we rotate Christmas Eve and Christmas day. Whoever has posession of SD for Christmas Eve recieves her at 8 P.M. on the 23rd. Then at 8 P.M. on the 24th she is picked up by the other parent. We have 75% custody so in our case BM will only see her Christmas Eve and we will have her until January 1st when her mom picks her up for her five week days...pretty complicated x.x;; really looking forward to when we go to standard custody when she starts Preschool next year...

kasper923 · December 2011

Ours is 9am Dec 19th - 9am Dec. 25th then BM get her 9am Dec 25th- Jan 1st. It sucks b/c SD wakes up, opens her gifts then has to leave them for 2 weeks. BM doesn't celebrate holidays but won't relent so she can spend a little extra time with us and our families.

wwnbw · December 2011

Ours starts the day they get out of school and ends at noon on the 28th. The other parent has from then to the day before school starts. School usually starts the 1st-3rd so if you don't get Christmas that year you pretty much are screwed and really don't get any of the break. I think the 26th would be better but it is what it is.

What time does she want to pick him up on Christmas eve? I think since it's your weekend that 6pm sounds fair...will she go for that?

FutureMrsDrew73110 · December 2011

Our CO says in odd years DH has the kids from 10am-10pm Christmas Eve and BM gets the kids from 10pm Christmas eve until 10pm Christmas day. The schedule reverses in Even years.

Seeing as how Christmas falls on our weekend this year We'll get the kids as usual on Friday night and we'll have them until Christmas eve night.

And seeing as how all 3 skids are in school now we've decided to split their holiday break by: The parent that has the children Christmas Day gets the kids for the first half of their break, and the parent who had the kids for New Years has them for the second half of their break.(Doing it this way cuts down on back and forth travel and each parent gets the kids for 3 days they should be in school. Normal weekends and holidays are extra days) So this year We will drop off the kids to BM at 10pm on Christmas eve and she'll bring them back to us at 7pm on the night of the 28th and we'll have them from the 28th-Jan 2nd.

ballmom · December 2011

SO's CO states that the parents will split the time the children are on school break. In the odd years, NCP will have first 1/2 (which generally includes Christmas). The parent who does not have Christmas fall on their time will have time with the children on Christmas Day from Noon-9pm.

This year, Christmas falls during his PT and what would have been his weekend.

Ilumine · December 2011

To be honest, I think splitting up the holiday like this is just a sucky thing to do.

I remember having to do Christmas Eve with my mother's family, then heading out early for a two+ hour drive to visit my dad's family, just to drive back later that day.

As a kid, I hated it, but kept a pretty smile on my face so I would not disappoint my grandmothers and parents.

I can just imagine how the kids feel when it comes to a blended family...

So, as I look at my DD while I type this, knowing just how heartbreaking it would be to not have her with me, I would alternate the full holiday, from Christmas Eve morning through the evening of Boxing day.

Gwenillian · December 2011

We didn't want the kids to spend their whole holiday driving so our CO states alternating holidays and pickups always are at 7:15pm the night before. So technically whomever has Christmas Eve and/or New Years Eve really gets shafted. However, there is also extended holiday placement written in (for Christmas vacation from school) for their dad. As long as it's a good year & he's willing to work things out we generally trade both Christmas holidays for both New Year's ones so that there's less driving around and/or we can both make travel plans if we want. Every year is different though - sometimes he's willing to work it out & sometimes he wants to try to demand it all. In the end if he won't budge we go back to the strict CO & someone gets kind of a cruddy holiday that year. Even though I hate it, I try to remember that even though they may not have had a great Christmas at MY house, they are having one somewhere with people who love them.

karatechrissy · December 2011

I don't understand why your co is so specific on times, yet there is no start time for christmas eve? Anyway, I think what you propose is fair. Our co has DH and BM split the holidays. One parent gets Christmas eve the other Christmas day, alternating years. Our times are 9-5 with the exception of Christmas eve and new years eve and 4th of July. Those times are 1-9.

Ginlyn0 · December 2011

Ours are split from the day they get out of school at 6pm - Dec 26th at noon and from Dec 26th at noon-the day before they get go back to school at 6pm with alternating years. Therefore, one parent gets Christmas Eve and Christmas and the next year the other parents gets them which sucks when it's not your year, but is great when it is. So it kind of evens out.

I think in your case 6pm on Christmas Eve is appropriate.

cookiemomstarr · December 2011

Thanks for your thoughts. DH and I always try to be fair when it comes to setting times with BM. Depending on her personality the day we ask....she might agree to be fair, or decide to stomp her feet and throw a fit. She's a real peach!

MamaGogo76 · December 2011

Wow, reading the replies makes me very thankful we live just 20 mins away from BM and the CA is very specific. One parent has SS 10am Xmas eve, if not already at their house, through 10am Xmas morning. The other parent gets him from 10am until 8pm Xmas evening if it isn't already their custody day. It alternates each year so each parent gets to do the "wake up and see what Santa brought" every other year. We have 50/50 custody and the CA states a 10am/8pm pickup & drop off for every holiday so there doesn't have to be a negotiation each year. Good luck to you!

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