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How do I stay un involved
quick background- MIL is a selfish and childish. She believe the world revolves around her and her needs. She made up a story to my DH that she heard she wasn't welcome at our house for Christmas. We are hosting my IL's this year. I have no idea where she heard that from. I haven't told a single soul that. She likes to make Dh feel like guily like we owe her something if our LO's see my parents. She has a tendenacy to give up, fake sick, or down right throw fit if things don't go her way. She once left a trip early bc we couldn't pay for her to go to the Aquarium.
Yesterday FIL calls to tell DH that his grandpa is coming to our house for Christmas dinner. (GP lives in TX and never gets to see the boys) He will stay in a hotel but come over in the afternoons. I really like GP and can't wait to see him. MIL doesn't get along with GP. Long story short, FIL tells DH to not tell MIL that GP is coming to my house to visit the same time she will be there. So it will basically be a surprise she isn't asking for. I know my MIL to well and I know she is going to not be happy and I will be damned if she ruins my Christmas. I love this holiday. I love the spirit of it all. I really really want to stay out of this but I just cant shake the feeling she's going to be pissed. What do I do? I don't plan on telling her but god I'm starting to dread this visit and the drama looming around..
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Re: How do I stay un involved
What is it with MIL's thinking the world revolves around them? Seriously get a grip. My Thanksgiving was ruined by my 60 year old MIL who threw a ginormous hissy fit in front of Magic Kingdom because we wouldn't ditch my Mom and hang out with her and my SIL's family. UGH.
I feel your pain my friend.
What does your DH say?
It sounds like a set up for an awful day, honestly.
If it were my family, I'd ask them to take their circus somewhere else or at least hold it on the day before or day after so my family could enjoy a day of peace on the 25th. Since it's your H's family, I'd ask him how he wants to handle it.
THIS.
I would ship this problem right over to your H and ask him to deal with it. I don't see anyway for you to handle this yourself without causing WWIII.
Your ILs sound like they deserve each other.
Sorry they are dragging you both in the middle of this.
First of all...
We have the same MIL and it sucks.
My FIL has put up with it for SO long that he and her WHOLE family do not stand up to her when she has her childish rants. Because they know its a no-win situation.
DH and I think its awful and we stand up to her, especially when she tries to dictate what OUR family is doing and blah.
I wouldnt tell her... But I would voice your concerns to FIL that worked with us for Thanksgiving.
This is exactly the situation we are in. MIL is terrible at acting like a child. I do not understand how her husband or children who live close by put up with it. I think I will just tell DH to talk to his parents. They shouldn't keep secrets or surprises like this.
Seriously! I have amazing ILs (it helps that DH has a small family and no siblings) and I can't remember one time that my MIL has actually made me angry over something she has said or done. In fact, I can only remember once that I was even mildly annoyed with her and that was NBD.
I feel awful for people (like my sister) who have nightmare ILs.