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how do I respond to this?
For some reason I've gotten the question a few times recently about if I "plan on" delivering the babies vaginally.
I would never ask anyone this, it seems very personal. But no one I know has twins and I think they just don't understand, I'm more concerned about WHEN they're born than how. I feel like saying, "of course, but it's out of my hands!" but that seems like such an obvious answer, I don't know what to say to people without being a jerk when they judge me on my liaise fair attitude towards c-sections.
Married 07/2011 
ID Twin girls 04/2012
Baby #3 Due Jan. 2017
ID Twin girls 04/2012
Baby #3 Due Jan. 2017
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Re: how do I respond to this?
I also found this question personal...and would get really embarassed when my colleagues were asking me. Such an awkward topic for work! I told DH that sometimes I really felt like saying "When did my vagina become appropriate conversation?"
I responded like PP and would say that we were going to do it the safest way come delivery time.
What also annoyed me was when people said "They aren't going to MAKE you have a c-section, are they?" or when people said "Oh, so you're going to have a c-section."
Ahhh the comments.....I don't miss them.
edited - sp
Depends on whether it's a man or a woman asking. (I'm assuming a stranger)
Woman: I was hoping to deliver vaginally, can I borrow yours so I don't end up with cheeseburger vag?
Man: Hmm... well, let me ask you this. Would you sign up to push two watermelons out of your right nostril?
Then give them evil laugh.
Oh my God, I love this answer.
DH: 31, normal!
April/May 2011: Menopur + Ovidrel +TI = BFN
Oct 2011: Menopur + Hcg +IUI = BFP!
Beta #1 (13dpiui)= 129.7, Beta #2 (15 dpiui)= 305
PAIF/SAIF always welcome!
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I am so stealing this! LOL!
I usually answer with the shortest answer possible... I find sometimes that even saying "yes" turns into a huge discussion about how it's possible, or why I'd want to try. With closest family members and a couple of my girlfriends, I'll talk about it and once I explain everything, including how you can have a plan but sometimes the babies do what they want, they usually don't ask again. For strangers and people I'm not comfortable talking about L&D to, I usually say something like "I have to wait until further in the pregnancy to see where the babies are".
I also like pp's recommendations to give snarky responses or play stupid, I wish I thought quick enough on my feet to do that. Usually I'm just so surprised at the questions people ask that I just try to wiggle my way out of the conversation as fast as possible.
The other one I get weirded out by is when people ask if I'm going to breastfeed. I'm sorry, you're DHs second cousin who I've met twice, what does it matter to you? I had DH start telling his family "they'll be fed and healthy" when his family members start asking.
Ditto this! (Though I do know some opt for being sliced open; we all have our preferences.
) Such a rude, intrusive question!
Is there something about having twins that makes people more likely to say things like this?! I've gotten that from a few not-close family members, and over Thanksgiving got really strange questions from people I'm NOT related to at all!
I like the first PP's suggestion about just getting them here safely.
This is one of those questions that always led to verbal diarrhea for me.
THEM: So, do have have to have a csection?
ME: Yes, I will have to have a csection.
THEM: They're making you have a csection? You can have twins naturally, you know.
ME: Yes, I know, but in my case I'll have to have a csection.
THEM: Why? My cousin had twins naturally in her bed at home, and one was breech! You can find a doctor around here who will do it.
ME: Well, I do have a breech baby but I also have some other issues so a csection is safer. (Oops, there goes the can of worms.)
THEM: Oh really? What other issues?
For some reason, I never got the hang of telling people it was none of their business, so at this point I started rambling about huge fibroids and uterine septums and I could always pinpoint the moment they regretted ever asking...
That was my go to answer. That or, "We won't make any decisions until I go into labor or we get to my scheduled date, whichever comes first."
I think the question doesn't seem as taboo as it used to because of the numerous elective c-sections in the country, people just assume that it's something you have a choice in rather than being expected to deliver vaginally unless there are complications like it used to be.
Absolutely love this response. I was just asked this by my SIL, who has had two Csections herself. So you'd think she'd know sometimes it's out of your hands. When I told her my docs practice (a high risk practice) only does Csections for twins, she looked horrified. But as I told her, if I'm pay these professionals all this money to get these kids out of me safe as possible, why am I gonna go quibble over how they think it should be done. I see no point in me being hung up on some birthing plan when anything can happen at time time. Just so long as babies are healt, I'm thankful for whatever it took to get them here like that.