Feeding guests that come to visit LO

EvenAngelsFall · November 2011

I know this is probably the LAST darn thing I should be worrying about? BUT the Italian hostess in me feels like I need to feed anyone who comes to visit me and the baby once we are home. Nothing major of course.... just something to put out.
So far I got some frozen cheese cake (assuming people will give at least a day?s notice before stopping by so I can thaw it), and some ready to bake cookie dough?.
Any one else buying or making anything to keep on hand?

NewMomAlyssa · November 2011

You are crazy lady! They are supposed to be feeding YOU! Anyway, I figure I'll have Christmas treats that ppl bring to me (hoping??) to share.

slmayer1981 · November 2011

I might stock up on drinks to offer our guests but no one will be fed. I think everyone will understand if you're not the "hostess with the mostess" a few days after giving birth.

emd2887 · November 2011

Absolutely not. In fact, we have warned my family that if they eat our food, they need to replace it (this is after my brother coming and eating 2 weeks worth of groceries in a matter of days, not just me being a b!tch). I guess I feel like if there is ever a time when people should be bringing us food instead of expecting us to entertain, this is it.

EvenAngelsFall · November 2011

LOL, yeah you guys are most definitely all correct....

I guess I just feel bad because all my friends and family live so far, and no one will be coming from any closer than an hour away....

But I am sure you are correct in sying that they THEY will be the ones to bring the noms-noms, and I should NOT stress over this! Stick out tongue

turner215 · November 2011

haha, My family is SO different. They are bringing US food when they visit LO. I am not providing anything. They are cooking for us and bringing us food.

Happily Overwhelmed · November 2011

I think my face went red when I read the title of this one...

I too am a huge hostess. I go ALL OUT....when people are invited. I'm pretty sure my mother expects me to be stocking the freezer to accommodate as a "good wife and mother" should.

NO WAY! With the LO coming and the holidays money is tight. I'm making sure there's enough meat in the freezer and canned goods for DH to whip small meals up to feed the two of us. That's the end of it. I don't want guests to over stay their welcome and feeding them is only going to make them think they are on vacation.

If I were asking for help I MIGHT feel differently and try and prepare freezer meals or save money for take out. But I'm not asking for help. I'm asking for space. My dream is both sets of parents visit for no longer than an hour at a time (they both live fairly close). It's really important for me to get rest, learn to BF, and bond with my little family of 3. The last thing I want to worry about is feeding people that will probably be on my nerves at the time.

kylayton · November 2011

I'm with PP. They should most definitely be feeding YOU! lol.

EvenAngelsFall · November 2011

Yeah, the Italians in my family will most be definitely bringing us MEALS... I was thinking more along the lines of "pick on " foods... but ya'all are so right. Screw it! LOL

I guess I'll chalk my orginal question up to either temproary pregnancy insanity, or over active nesting! LOL

Cookie427 · November 2011

HA I could have written this! I just plan on having plenty of drinks (sodas, etc) in the pantry and probably some cookies out. I was just thinking snacks since we dont have a scheduled time for a bunch of visitors, most likely it would be in an out. (Can I get you something to drink, have a cookie type of thing.)

Maggie-Moo · November 2011

I am also struggling with this, as I want to feel like a good hostess, but know that any sane person has no expectations of being entertained/fed so am trying not to stress too much about it. Since it is right around Christmas, I am plannign on doing a bunch of Christmas baking with my mom (starting tomorrow, actually) and freezing a lot of cookies, etc so I can pull out a tin of them when people are around. I am also going to try to bake some loaves that I can have out with tea/coffee, knowing that someone else can make the drinks. I am more comfortable if people around me are eating, since then I can go upstairs and BF as needed and won't feel like they are there twiddling their thumbs. I have no concerns about my immediate family, but DH's is several hours away and I have already said they can't stay over, so I am thinking having some mid-afternoon snacks is a nice compromise...

I am planning no meals for guests, however, and several friends have mentioned that they are bringing over dinner to have with us when we are up for visitors. I have awesome friends and am looking forward to seeing them and know they absolutely get boundaries and will be there to make my life easier not harder!

cdymond · November 2011

DH's family visits a lot when babies are born... like people are over every single day for weeks after you get home. Luckily, we moved away so we won't have to deal with this. But from my experience with other first time moms, people almost always bring something. If you're really worried, I'd have mixed nuts, pretzels or some Christmas cookies in the freezer so you can throw some stuff out. But anything more than that would be totally unnecessary on your part.

If the time comes and you're stressed about it, ask a close relative to pick up some KFC on their way over or order a pizza or two. You shouldn't have to, but in some cultures you just can't get rid of that need to play hostess.

heatherjh · November 2011

RedheadBaker:
I haven't offered food to anyone who has visited so far. DS came earlier than expected, and I just don't have any food to offer them. They either only stay for about an hour anyway, or they bring food with them.

Yeah, we don't have have extra food either and if they're visiting, they should be bringing Christmas cookies at least, lol. Seriously, although we live in a smaller town, there's tons of resteraunts, even an IHOP. Although I'm sure I won't be feeling up to dragging a newborn out, etc, they can certainly go before or after visiting us since it's a 2 hr trip back for them.

Tussie Mussie · November 2011

Our family will have to fly to come visit. They are coming one at a time, and spaced out, but will be staying with us for 2 weeks each. So I guess at some point I will need to feed them lol. I'm not really worried about it though. Both mine and DH's families are really laid back and will not have any expectations. I doubt they will have any reservations about going to the kitchen and fixing themselves something to eat either which is perfect for me!

heatherjh · November 2011

EvenAngelsFall:

Yeah, the Italians in my family will most be definitely bringing us MEALS... I was thinking more along the lines of "pick on " foods... but ya'all are so right. Screw it! LOL

I guess I'll chalk my orginal question up to either temproary pregnancy insanity, or over active nesting! LOL

There's nothing wrong with wanting to feed everyone, but this is a chance for you to relax and let them visit and take care of you. I would love to do my normal holiday baking, usually make at least 6 dozen cookies, all differnet kinds, but I know it's not going to happen this year. I usually enjoy giving some of them out as presents to my family, but I'll be lucky to even make some for my new family here much less get Christmas cards sent out on time

DiademChi · November 2011

The Latina hostess in me understands the need to feed all who walk in the door. I used to do the same in my college dorm room, let alone when in my full house and kitchen.

Anyway, I would keep some easy to distribute baked items and pre-cut cheese and crackers on hand. Basically, stick with snacks you can eat and also offer guests at the last minute, nothing that requires planning or heating.

In general, I don't think most American baby-well-wishers are concerned about being fed, and just want to see the baby.

colelee · November 2011

I think that people should bring you food. But it would be nice to be able to offer some cookies or little snacks. And the frozen cookies barely take any effort to make. =]

MrsT2008 · November 2011

They can eat whatever snacks I have in my house if they really want something to eat, but this is one thing I am letting myself NOT worry about. And I highly doubt any of my visitors will expect me to be feeding them. I will offer, but with nothing specific beyond what's in my pantry/fridge, I don't think anyone will actually eat anything

ETA: I am a hostess at heart too, but IMO, this isn't like you're inviting them to some party where they'd expect to be fed!

getnmarried910 · November 2011

I'm not going to do anything. If they want to eat something when they come see us, they are free to bring something. It's not my job to entertain right after giving birth.

alkinney · November 2011

The soon to be exhausted greek/Czech and Irish hostess in me says Hellllllllllll no. I'm hoping they bring ME some snacks. Stick out tongue

ContactDanielle · November 2011

I'm going to make some chocolate covered pretzels for snacks and gifts either before or after baby comes. They are super easy to sit at the table and dip. I don't know about other foods, I wanted to get some freezer meals ready, but I don't think it's going to happen. If anything there will be meat in the freezer and taco seasoning in the pantry and they can run to the store to get cheese and taco shells (I might buy these and freeze them also). Or make some chili or spaghetti, or sloppy joes. Things that don't take much. The only people that would expect food food (but they would make it) would be my family and DH's family (but his might want it cooked for them).

beka0404 · November 2011

I have some appetizers in the freezer, I canned a boatload of salsa this summer and I'll be freezing a bunch of cookies once I do my holiday baking, so I'll be able to put SOMETHING out, but otherwise people will be on their own. I really think most people don't expect to be fed, but in my own situation I married into a family that lives to entertain and expectations are a bit different (e.g., I've heard that my SIL was criticized by some of my in-laws for serving "store bought" food at her first son's baptism... awesome).

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