I feel like a bad person because...what do you think?

JeansKismet · November 2011

I'm not apposed to the 'Baby leash'

Not that I'm going to use it because people would look at my like I'm a monster.

I've taken care of a few children that could have used one...on the other hand I'm pretty sure I can teach my child to behave and not run off on me.

I guess thinking about it; If I were worried my child was going to run out in the street or something I could use a stroller or something.

What do you ladies think? Are you for or against it? Why? Have you ever used it?

lizzybean · November 2011

I'm not gonna lie, they really creep me out everytime I see a poor kid strapped into one of those.

I'm not a current Mother though, so I really cant judge. And Im sure they have their uses, like perhaps taking your toddler to somewhere very busy like Disney or the like.

So, Im split. Im sure there will be Moms on here with very valid reasons for having used them in the past.

thatoneredhead · November 2011

When I was a teenager, I babysat for a lady who specifically told me to "walk the baby and heres her backpack"... aka leash.

I literally felt like I was walking a dog.

But if I took my toddler somewhere (im thinking the airport or similar) where I knew it would be a nightmare to keep tabs of 1000 different things and there are a million people there... I might not be against the idea.

It felt weird though. I dont like the look of pet kid, but I dont judge either.

Discordia1030 · November 2011

For me, personally, I won't use them and used to think it was just lazy parenting. However, now I know they can be useful to parents of children with sensory issues and therefore I've changed my tune a bit. Still not for me, but I don't necessarily judge those who do (anymore at least, and I mean that when I see them in a non-crowded environment).

claudiaudia · November 2011

I personally hate them, but I can see a use if your child has some kind of issues. I have a two and a half year old who is very active and can have trouble listening, but we've just set the expectation that he doesn't run away. And he doesn't. I would have the same expectations of a child that had a developmental issue as well, but I think I would be much more cautious.

cmchristian · November 2011

Here is the way I look at it. If you put them in a stroller and they want just to have that freedom to walk around they will kick and scream in the stroller and try to get out. Not a fight I want to fight.

If you try to hold their hand, you are so much taller than them and there arm is held up for who knows how long. I know my hand would fall asleep when I had my hand up in class and waited for the teacher to call on me. WHen that happens the kid will try to rip their hand out of yours and cry and scream if you don't let them go.

If you hold them, they will get heavy and bending down to pick them up and set them down will do a number on your back. Again, not worth that pain.

If I have a "leash" on them I can easily hold them back from running too far. I will use one for my kids just for the sake of less headaches and back pains. Mama is happy, the tots are happy. Win-Win. Judge me if you want. Its my kid and it isn't traumatizing them. I'm keeping my kid in a safe controlled distance.

sassafras007 · November 2011

I HATE them but one would be really helpful with my almost 2 year old.

However, I will probably never use one just casue I cannot stand how they look.

Right now I just walk with her, follow her, carry her, wear her or she is in the stroller....

Duewith2nd · November 2011

Hell yes I used them. When DS was 18 mo-2 &1/2 we used one a lot. He was fast, and he would move before we could stop him. We couldn't use the stroller because he would scream. But he Loved that backpack. When he got a little older, he started understanding he couldn't run in front of cars.

I honestly didn't care if people looked down on me. My child's safety is much more important then their opinion. Each kid is different. If you have a high energy, do before thinking type of kid, you may need one.

soapymk · November 2011

cmchristian:
Here is the way I look at it. If you put them in a stroller and they want just to have that freedom to walk around they will kick and scream in the stroller and try to get out. Not a fight I want to fight.
If you try to hold their hand, you are so much taller than them and there arm is held up for who knows how long. I know my hand would fall asleep when I had my hand up in class and waited for the teacher to call on me. WHen that happens the kid will try to rip their hand out of yours and cry and scream if you don't let them go.
If you hold them, they will get heavy and bending down to pick them up and set them down will do a number on your back. Again, not worth that pain.
If I have a "leash" on them I can easily hold them back from running too far. I will use one for my kids just for the sake of less headaches and back pains. Mama is happy, the tots are happy. Win-Win. Judge me if you want. Its my kid and it isn't traumatizing them. I'm keeping my kid in a safe controlled distance.

I feel the same way! My almost 3 year old kicks and scream if you hold her hand too long and crossing streets and parking lots and crowded places are dangerous they could get lost or hurt or worse I was looking into buying one because I don't know about anyone else with a kid going through the horrible 3 s but she wants to walk independently and not hold a hand constantly. Don't judge until you go through the terrible 2s and 3 s

bookworm982 · November 2011

My mom had to fly internationally with two of my sisters and I. I was 4, one sister was 3, and the other sister was a baby. My mom used straps that connected to our wrists and hers, and put the baby in a carrier. It was the only way to travel. That said, we only used them at airports. I wouldn't be opposed to using them for travel, but the idea of using them everyday isn't my thing.

kmrambert · November 2011

I dont like them. The sight of them bugs the mess out of me. I will never use one. I feel that if you are going into a busy place where you worry your child might wonder off, put them in a stoller or buggy. Ive heard of instances where even children although "on their leash" could still be kidnapped if the parent is not looking. All that parent feels is the "tug and pull" on the other end and think their child is still there, when it actually could be hooked onto some clothes rack or something....plus, your child is a human, not a dog... but thats just how i feel.

Im sure the folks who use them may have some valid reasons. To each his own...

WonderJess · November 2011

I REALLY don't understand the hate for backpacks.

My son was full on running at 11 months. Have you ever tried to "teach" an eleven month old to hold hands and not run off on his own?? Yeahhhhhhh. Not going to happen. Really.

So, yes, we used an awesome monkey backpack in crowded places and he loved it. He wasn't pissed off about being confined to a stroller, he got some freedom to stretch his legs and explore, all within the safety of being 3 feet from mom or dad. Again... crowded places... the mall for example.

Err... not knowing if my kid is on the other end and thinking it is hooked on something else?? You have to be one hell of a terrible parent to not be watching your child every second they are out and about at that young age, "tethered" or not. Please.

He will be two in 2 weeks and I can't remember the last time we used it. MANY months ago. Because at this point we HAVE worked really hard on the hand holding and learning the word "stop!"... but I absolutely would not hesitate to use the backpack at the airport, amusement park, or really wherever his safety was a concern.

Haters, please consider:

- Sensory issues. 'Nuff said.
- Early walkers vs. reasoning skills
- Some kids just do NOT tolerate strollers
- Why do you have issue with "confinement"? Is the stroller not the same "strapping them down"?... the crib? It's all about safety no matter how you slice it.
- Why the problem with comparing them to dogs? I personally think it is a silly comparison but consider WHY you leash a dog... what? You don't want your dog to run off and get hurt? Hmmmm.

Really for me it came down to my guy being happy. He had a window of development where the backpack made the most sense for us. Don't knock it till you've tried it... or been there.

And lazy parenting? Not. Even. Close. for the majority of users.

AmandaStarr81 · November 2011

I am totally and completely for them. I think they have a time and a place for use. I think that some people look negatively on them because they believe that only "lazy" or "unequipped" parents use them. In some cases I believe that it is true, but in many, many others it is not. It is parents trying to be responsible and showing their love and concern for their children. I think they can be used as an aide between "can't walk yet" and "can control impulses".

Asquared · November 2011

Haven't read any responses yet, but I'll just say if you say "I would never" you're basically cursing yourself to have a runner. My oldest hated the stroller so we tried the backpack (yes, I prefer to call it that Smile

) she would do okay for a tiny bit then try to twist around me and hang by it, so not cool. So what worked best for us w/ her was the Ergo. Then w/ dd #2 came along and got mobile, I'd have at least one of them in squeaker shoes- thankfully she did better in a stroller.

Sawyerplus1 · November 2011

I've never been opposed to them, and wouldn't judge someone for doing so, but I've never used one. My son is incredibly active and a 'leash' would certainly come in handy in some circumstances, but I just haven't got one. I think there are definitely children/circumstance for whom they work, and I really think it's unfair to judge someone who does.

marielovestimothy03 · November 2011

Never say never. I don't usually use one or need to use one but I had to fly alone with my 2u2 when DD1 was only about 18 months old and DD2 was 6 weeks. It was a LIFESAVER. I didn't want to take my stroller through security at the airport because I knew it would just be too much with two little ones (and the security people don't always lend a hand). So I put her on a little backpack leash, she got to run off all her energy without running away and it made things so much easier. That's the only scenario I've felt like I really needed that extra grip on her. I definitely don't judge parents who use them (unless they are totally ignoring their kid) because you just never know the situation.

cookiemomstarr · November 2011

I believe it depends on the child. I was a nanny for 3 kids. The youngest was 6 weeks when I started and 3 when my term was over. She.was.crazy!!!!!

This is why she needed one...

I would take her everywhere, she loved going out. I took her to shopping centers, malls, play groups, play grounds, little gym etc. as soon as she learned how to walk, I let her. I held her hand and she would walk everywhere. She loved the independence. And then...POOF! She'd be off like a bullet. It was so fast, she'd shake my hand and be halfway in the street before i could blink an eye. She was CRAZY!! I bought the "leash" for her. I still held her hand and walked with her like a normal child. I did NOT walk her like a dog. It was just a safety backup for when she decided to take off! Her mom freaked when I bought it( she never put the baby down). I asked her to walk with her and hold her hand next time you go out. You should have seen her moms gave when she came back!! All she said was "gimme that backpack, she's crazy!!!!!!!"

Blue Pansy · November 2011

I don't have an opinion. Whatever works for your family. This just isn't something I can muster any judgment about (and trust me, I'm normally a judging PRO).

Pachita · November 2011

If a child is very active and you need to supervise him/ him 100% of the time, then a 'leash' would be appropriate. If it's for the child's safety, I'm for it.

ASmallWonder · November 2011

For the people against them because they think it's like treating your child like a dog, please realize that a crib is nothing more than a glorified crate or cage. You do that so your child is safe, just like you do for an animal you love.

We use our monkey backpack at the farmer's market. It's hard to navigate a stroller near the stands and my son likes to stop and pick flowers, walk up to other people and say hi, etc. He likes to be on his feet and the back pack helps him learn boundaries. We don't let him run to the end of the length and snap it back. We walk with him and still use the same words we would otherwise - stop, slow, stay near mommy, etc. He gets to learn those things while mommy doesn't have to worry about him darting off.

jessiej7428 · November 2011

JeansKismet:
I'm not apposed to the 'Baby leash'
Not that I'm going to use it because people would look at my like I'm a monster.
I've taken care of a few children that could have used one...on the other hand I'm pretty sure I can teach my child to behave and not run off on me.
I guess thinking about it; If I were worried my child was going to run out in the street or something I could use a stroller or something.
What do you ladies think? Are you for or against it? Why? Have you ever used it?

We don't have one now, but we are considering getting one. Our son doesn't understand to stay by me, doesn't like holding hands for too long and will throw a fit if he doesn't get to go where he wants. I try as hard as I can to teach him not to run away, but he has some sensory issues. It gets so hard to go shopping with him, he won't stay in the cart and I can't carry him around and push the cart and put things in the cart. It's only going to get worse when I'm 9 months pregnant. Going shopping without him isn't really an option. My husband leave for work around 8:30 and comes home between 6 and 6:30. So either I take Jordan or I have to go really early in the morning (he doesn't sleep through the night and I'd hate to be even more exhausted than I am now).

I wouldn't judge anyone for using them. You don't know what their circumstances are. I'd rather have my son be safe. I could careless what other people are thinking about what I'm doing. You also can't really say you will or will not do something unless you're put in that situation. I said I'd never use the leash and I'm seriously considering it.

zenneedles · November 2011

I am not against it. If it does harm the child and keeps it safe, I think it's a great idea.

CuteBride8808 · November 2011

i don't mind them...they can be so cute actually....I saw one that looked like a stuffed animal monkey on the kids back

geauxfrogs · November 2011

We have one, but haven't really needed it with DD. My mom had one for my brother and got told nasty things about it. He was 2, I was 6, and she had twins that were infants. My brother was a runner and hider, and there were places my mom couldn't get in with the double stroller. Her response was, you care enough about your pets to keep them on a leash so they are safe, why can't I care enough about my son to do the same thing?

caralck · November 2011

My mom never used one on my brothers and I but DH was leashed because he would run off and with his dad unable to run after him (he had polio as a child and walking fast was the most he could do), it became a safety issue after he once ran into the lake and kept going even though he could barely swim. He was up to his neck before his mom got to him. I think if we have kids like DH, then a leash might be necessary and they do make some cute ones these days. DH was on a retractable leash they happened to have for their dog after that above incident. My nephew was secured in the stroller as punishment every time he ran off. My bro and sil got used to ignoring him when he would scream in the stroller. It was sort of his time-out for running off. He's getting better at not running off but still does it from time to time (He's almost 3). His older sister was the complete opposite.

pickle82 · November 2011

BethAndBen:

I don't like them and want to say that I will never use one. However, I do not have any children, so I can't make that call yet

Yes This wins the cheese! It's hard to know exacly how you'll parent until you meet your kid.

We never had one for our very fast and independent 2 yearold, but I would have used one in an instant...if I had it. There are cute monkey backpacks and you can fill them with things like diapers and wipes, snacks and water. Useful! Let them carry their essentials!

I agree with PP that it is not a method of lazy parenting. It is smart and safe to be cautious. Especially places like the fair, the farmers market, the airport, going on a walk on a busy street, or any other public place with grabby people. Your LO would rather walk at some point, and hand holding becomes "old" fast. When this baby comes I might just own a "lazy parent leash." Wink

erbear · November 2011

I've never used one, because my 2.5 year old listens well and is pretty compliant. However, I'd never judge someone using one and if Caroline is a runner, I'll get one.

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