Potty training advice please! (kinda long)

rnin02 · November 2011

So we've been working on potty training here for a long time. We used to take a more casual approach, prior to his 3rd birthday, and once in a while he would use the potty but most of the time he refused...like getting hysterical, making his limbs stiff, etc, refusal, so we never pushed it. At daycare my DCP just puts him on the potty every 2-3 hours and he uses it just fine for her, and has been for maybe 9 months now, maybe longer. He turned 3 in August, and probably 3 weeks ago we decided to take a more active approach. I made him a potty rewards chart, for peeing he gets one sticker, pooping will get him 2 stickers, and once he reaches 16 stickers (I know, 16 is a random number, but it fit well on our chart) he gets a Thomas train. So far he's earned 3 new trains, and by the end of the day he will earn his 4th. He absolutely refuses to poop on the potty and will not even poop when we are around, so I can't even catch him "in the act" and encourage using the potty. He pees in the potty without complaint, but rarely, rarely tells me he has to, I usually remind him every few hours and then he will go. If we don't remind him, he will just go in his pull up. I tried putting him in underwear, but he didn't care about getting pee on himself or his underwear, so I went back to pull ups for now.

What should be the next step? How long should I expect to have to keep giving him rewards for using the potty; at what point do kids just use the potty because they are supposed to and not because of a reward? I was all for waiting till he was ready and really "got it" but he definitely understands what a potty is for at this point, and we really want to get him started with preschool soon, but for the majority they need to be potty trained. I feel a bit lost at this point so any input would be great, thanks!

Jitterbug2668 · November 2011

as messy as this could get, can you let him run around naked?

rnin02 · November 2011

Jitterbug2668:
as messy as this could get, can you let him run around naked?

We've tried that in the past and he didn't really seem to care much, but we are considering trying that again this weekend since DH and I will both have Thursday-Saturday off. I am trying to get some ideas so we can really get some "quality" potty training in this weekend, lol:) Thanks!

Jitterbug2668 · November 2011

It worked wonders for my neighbors kid. Thank god we live out in the country because she was running around the cul de sac naked but it worked!

tomandcourt · November 2011

Jitterbug2668:
as messy as this could get, can you let him run around naked?

I was going to suggest this, too. Or at least in actual underpants vs. diapers. I read this article about potty training today and she made the good point that with diapers, they don't feel that they're wet immediately so it's hard to make the connection that peeing=wetness.

Good luck!

BabyHatch · November 2011

We put DD in underwear and just let her soil herself---she hated it, as did we. But, 4 (messy) days later she was basically potty trained for the day (still wears a diaper for naps and overnight). GL!

Sofka · November 2011

go to babycenter.com and search for "3 day potty training method"

I would let him be naked from the waist down and make him clean up any and all messes

keep away from carpeted areas, good luck!

smacb · November 2011

We're having/have had similar issues. We saw a big improvement with underwear. I tried naked at one point. He had no problem pooping on the kitchen floor.

DS had issues with pooping. It was related to constipation (it hurt to poop) and a fear of falling in the potty. He pees standing up.

We started off rewarding DS for using the potty. When it became clear having wet pants didn't bother him, we switched to rewards only if he keeps his pants dry all day and bringing him home from 'fun things' if he has an accident while we're out.

2vthokies · November 2011

We had the exact same issue. DCP pee trained DD1 in about two weeks in Sept 2010, but she refused to go at home (we just had DD2, so I think that was part of the problem). By Dec 2010 I finally got her to go at home (on a little potty) but we had to remind her all the time. She refused to poop in the potty at DCP or at home and she refused to sit on the big potty. Between Dec 2010 and June 2011 we worked on (sticker charts, etc.) peeing in the big potty, but poop was always in the diaper. She never had accidents, she would hold it all day until she got home and then ask for a diaper so she could poop (always during dinner). Sticker charts, bribes, toys, cheering, etc. did not work for pooping in the potty. Starting in July I told her every day that by her 3rd birthday (August) she had to start pooping in the potty. The day after her birthday party she asked for a diaper and I said no. We basically had a showdown and I won. I was fully prepared to clean poop out of the carpet if that's what it came down to. Try the 3-day potty weekend if that doesn't work pick a date, Christmas, if you celebrate it, might be good, and keep telling him what's going to happen. Your DS is old enough to generally understand deadlines. DD1 knew it was coming and once it arrived we had the upper hand. Good luck!

CandKmomma · November 2011

He bribe with fruit snacks, toy story, nemo, scooby and cars. He gets a whole pack for poop. When we were training he would bet 1 piece for pee. He no longer gets it for pee because he goes on his own. But poop is still a big deal. So I am ok with him eating a pack of "jellies" everyday. Works for us. Good luck!

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