Babies: 0 - 3 Months

I'm Going Crazy

DD cries and cries and cries.  It's most likely colic.  Nothing makes this child happy and we are doing the 5 S's from Happiest Baby on the Block like nobody's business.  I am starting to detach myself because the crying is literally driving me crazy and I'm sleep deprived.  My husband has to take her because I can't take it anymore.  I'm feeling guilty and like a terrible mother.  Please tell me this gets better.  Please....
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Re: I'm Going Crazy

  • it will get better your not a bad mother your a mother who is over tired and the baby can sense how you are feeling you need to get some rest and it is ok for dh to take her you need to rest too.
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  • Hang in there! Taking some time off is a good thing. You need to keep sane. There are lots of things to try, but sounds like you've already gone down the list. It could be gas pains or your LO could be over tired. Have you tried a carrier or wrap? My DD always falls asleep in them. But you have to walk around to make it work. Just a thought. It might not work for everyone. Good luck!
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                               photo photosig3_zps92919c91.jpg Just said good bye Sept. 19th (MMC at 12 weeks)
  • You are NOT a bad mother, you are going through a very trying time..few things to try (as a mother who went through it as well):  heat a blanket and place it against their stomach then swaddle the LO; rub your LO's tummy in small circular motions applying a small amount of pressure (can help move the gas if that is the problem); nice tight swaddle; put your LO in the car seat and go driving...and always remember, it is PERFECTLY OK to put your LO in their crib and take a brief time out when you need it, even if she is crying!  
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  • My little man still does this from time to time. I was told to swaddle him tightly, but he always broke free. I was also told to put a warm out of the dryer towel across his tummy. His doc told me to use gas drops and make sure he has plenty of tummy time.

    Don't feel like a bad mother. We all have those times where we are running on half a minute of sleep and the baby has been screaming like a banshee all day and you feel like your at ur limits end...maybe beyond it. Just take a deep breath and remember that you will get thru this : D

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  • You are not a bad mommy...recognising when you need a break and being able to admit it and pass LO off to DH so that baby is safe and cared for and you can reset is being a GOOD mother--I personally tonight can't wait for DH to get home because DS has been on a warpath against sleeping today.

    When babies are fussy here and I can feel myself getting stressesd I make sure they are fed and diapers are changed then I load them up in the car and go to Caribou Coffee drive-thru-- (don't worry I"m not bringing hellions in to disturb everyone inside). If I'm lucky--the drive calms them and puts them to sleep, if I'm not so lucky I atleast get a hot tea and the 10 minute drive home to enjoy it with some radio...

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  • imageMama2Be11911:
    DD cries and cries and cries.  It's most likely colic.  Nothing makes this child happy and we are doing the 5 S's from Happiest Baby on the Block like nobody's business.  I am starting to detach myself because the crying is literally driving me crazy and I'm sleep deprived.  My husband has to take her because I can't take it anymore.  I'm feeling guilty and like a terrible mother.  Please tell me this gets better.  Please....

    It gets better - pinky swear!  My LO was the same at your LO's age and I walked the same path of feeling frustrated and incapable as a mother.  I had to put her down multiple times during a fit and walk out of the room to collect myself, stop my crying, take a deep breath and go back to her.  But it wasn't colic - just a phase.  Everything is just as new, unfamiliar and scary to her as it is to you...

    Keep doing whatever you're doing that feels right...you have a natural instinct of how to care for her and sooth her - it's just hard to be tuned into it when your so tired and frustrated.  There's a great lyric by The Band - 'you take what you need and you leave the rest'...that's my motto for life and I apply that to any advice I hear/read/am offered (unsolicited or not)...in other words, you'll figure out what works for you... 

    You are not a terrible mother - you're a human being...and you're doing a wonderful job!  Hang in there lady...

     

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  • You are not a terrible Momma. In fact, I give you lots of credit for recognizing that you need a break, and asking for help (or at least allowing DH to help). It definitely gets better. I completely remember being in that boat and feeling like the nights would never end. But DS and I figured each other out, and things got better...

    Are you breastfeeding? If so, have you tried eliminating dairy and/or soy from your diet? That was a huge thing for our LO. He was also diagnosed with reflux and between my elimination diet and his reflux meds with a few lifestyle changes, everyone's world was much improved.

    Hang in there Momma! Ask for help (and accept it) lots and lots. You don't have to do this on your own, and you don't have to have all the answers. None of us do! 

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  • It will get better. The first month or so is absolutely horrible. I felt like I was in a living nightmare when DD was first born. There were nights where I couldn't get her to stop crying and I so I just cried. I mean SOBBED, and DH would have to take her away from me. It's hard and I understand what you're going through. You are by no means a terrible mother, you're doing the best you can and when you have to walk away from your DD that's what's the best for the both of you. Because you don't want your innocent child around anger/frustration because they can sense it. Don't feel guilty because none of this is your fault. Babies cry.. and cry.. and cry.. This will pass though. It does goes better, I promise.
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  • omg i read this post and all the crying and pain from the first month and a half came flooding back - I was SO there, and I can honestly tell you, it really does get better. I was just thinking today how I'm really starting to connect with DD after 2 WHOLE MONTHS.
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  • Im so sorry i went through this with no.3 only and i was like night of the living dead. Nothing worked our house looked like a baby outlet we kept buying things 5s's car washing machine birthing ball. It does get better hang in there your not horrible let hubby take LO take a bath and a nap. It gets better.
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  • First of all, you're not a bad mother. I've been there and believe me, I had moments where I questioned wth I was thinking by having a baby. Talk about feeling like a terrible mother after thinking that. It does get better. I promise. It may not seem like it now but it will. I also want to add that I later did a lot of research and pressed the docs to listen to me to the point of switching pedis. I eventually learned that my dd has reflux. She is now on Prevacid and is a much better baby than at first. I'm actually bonding with her now and I thought I never would because I was so depressed over how she was before. 
  • imageMama2Be11911:
    DD cries and cries and cries.  It's most likely colic.  Nothing makes this child happy and we are doing the 5 S's from Happiest Baby on the Block like nobody's business.  I am starting to detach myself because the crying is literally driving me crazy and I'm sleep deprived.  My husband has to take her because I can't take it anymore.  I'm feeling guilty and like a terrible mother.  Please tell me this gets better.  Please....

    I could have written this word for word. I'm glad to hear from all the other ladies that it will get better. I lost it last night and started sobbing and DH had to take LO for the rest of the evening. I felt like a horrible mother too, or like I don't know what I'm doing. And I feel bad because I feel like I spend so much time being frustrated with LO (not all the time, but he is fussy a lot) that I feel like I'm not enjoying him as much as I should be. Don't get me wrong, I do love him to death and I do enjoy him... I'm just looking forward to him outgrowing this phase so we can both be a little happier. We don't have family close by so we don't get much help... I'm really looking forward to getting out of the house to visit family tomorrow through the weekend and maybe get a little break from LO since grandma will want to take care of him :] GL to you. 

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  • Thank you EVERYBODY!  Wow, this makes me feel so much better!  We actually had a pretty good night last night and she's napping now.  I am breastfeeding and we've eliminated dairy and soy and caffeine.  Of course, I want the best for her but a nice, big caffeinated latte from Starbucks would SO help me right now.  Good to know that it does get better.  Thank you! 
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