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October 2011 Moms
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Sexy time was not sexy

leahandbuckleahandbuck member
in October 2011 Moms

I got the go ahead from my doctor last Wednesday but was too chicken to have sex until Monday night.  So, I get myself geared up all day Monday waiting on DH to get home.  I should probably add that I have been too afraid to look at my vagina since the birth so I really had no idea what I was working with.  Anyway, we get going and there is no way DH is getting in anything but the tip in there, like I don't think it was physically possible.  I expected it to be a tight fit but I thought I would stretch out like before but there was no stretching at all.

Any advice ladies?  We used lots of lube and obviously will keep trying but god it was very uncomfortable.  I am afraid there will be tearing again and this time I will feel it because I won't have an epidural!

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Re: Sexy time was not sexy

  • nicki731nicki731
    I'm not to that point yet... but I'm afraid of this! I have been checking the situation out with a hand mirror and it looks like mine is closed up for lack of a better way to describe it, or like there's something in the way. I panicked and went to the doctor yesterday thinking I had some kind of issue, but he told me it's just going to take more time to get back to a more normal state (we'll see). Soooo... I don't know what to tell you, but I hope we both get there some day! haha
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  • morsey2011morsey2011 member
    I had a c/s, so worrying about where I tore isn't an issue. However, we did the deed at 7 weeks pp, and it was painful. We used lots of lube, but it still hurt. So our sexy time wasn't sexy either. We haven't tried again.
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  • blu-eyedwifeblu-eyedwife member
    I told DH that our first time back was easily the worst sex I'd ever had. It does get better, I promise. What helped us is having him take care of my needs first, before insertion. That made the first couple of times easier.
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  • canterbearytailscanterbearytails

    imageblu-eyedwife:
    I told DH that our first time back was easily the worst sex I'd ever had. It does get better, I promise.

    Good to know that it gets better.  We tried a couple weeks ago and had the same problem as the OP.  Tried again last night and finally went all the way, but I felt like I was dry on the inside and it was far from comfortable.

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  • forensicmamaforensicmama member

    Do you have scar tissue from a tear or episiotomy? It's likely that made it tighter. If you decide to wait longer, then wait longer. It won't be tight and hurt forever. I waited 12 weeks after DD was born. Tried at 6, but my episiotomy site still hurt too much. Felt much better at 12, but probably took a full year to feel anywhere close to normal.

    You won't tear, btw. You just need to give your body more time to heal, IMO. Every woman's body is different. Your body doesn't know magically that you're 6 weeks pp and then everything is OK down there. You may need to wait 8 or 10. In the meantime, there are other ways to pleasure and be pleasured. Maybe the practice will improve foreplay in the future. ;)

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