Another eating question...Will you let them eat whatever at dinner?

BabyCakes3 · November 2011

I try to fix dinner that everyone will enjoy, obviously But lately, DD barely eats any of it. But she will ask for cheese, yogurt, fruit, etc.

I don't mind letting her eat other healthy stuff BUT I would like to sit down & eat dinner with the family, not get out a yogurt, b/c she said she wants it & then her not eat it & ask for something else. I cannot stand getting up & down a million times. So lately, we've just been only letting her eat what's for dinner. Good/bad?

We end up playing this game... "Eat 3 more bites of this & 3 more bites of that & you can have a yogurt." Which used to work but now she throws a huge fit.

CD+AL · November 2011

Nope, at our house, you eat what I've fixed, or you don't eat. They aren't going to starve themselves, and I'm not a short-order cook or waitress. They might refuse to eat a time or two to see if you are serious, but it probably won't last long if you stick to your guns.

Spin313 · November 2011

We've been having a dinner problem all week long. DS is refusing to eat, saying everything is yucky (even kiddie staples like mac&cheese, grilled cheese, pasta, chicken nuggets, pizza). I usually do the whole "this is what's for dinner" but he hasn't eaten his dinner for a whole week, so I've caved and offered a no-cook alternative after the rest of us have finished our meal (yogurt, cheese, fruit).

jason&robin · November 2011

I always try to make sure I put something on the plate that I know they will like...such as yogurt, apples, garlic bread(if we are eating italian). Some nights, that's all they eat and then they don't get any sort of dessert or treat if one is offered. I don't make special meals unless I want to eat something I know they don't like. If I make beef fajitas for instance, I will make them a chicken quesadilla instead because I know they won't eat the fajitas and I don't want to pay to make the extra meat. there are very few times when they get something different.

HarrietNJMommy · November 2011

Read the book "Child of Mine". It will help you relax about kids and food. It helped me a great deal.

I'm not a short-order cook. I cook one meal, UNLESS I know that they will absolutely, without a doubt, hate it (like lamb, etc.) Then, I make them something simple like pasta. If they don't like it, they are offered a slice of bread (nothing too appealing) or they go to bed hungry. My kids have gone without dinner MANY nights.

FWIW, I was a VERY picky eater as a kid and now eat pretty much anything, even things people think are GROSS (like bone marrow and intestine soup), so I'm not worried at all about my kids' eating habits.

KathrynMD · November 2011

I very rarely offer DD another option once we're at the table - she either eats it or not. And she almost never asks for somrthing else. If we're having something that she's sketchy about, I'll only give her a small amount and then see what she does. I will offer her an option before we sit down - do you want cereal or yogurt, peas or brocolli, etc.

KristinKD · November 2011

Often, I either base our meals around what I know they already like -- like, we eat breaded chicken at least once a week because that's DD1's favorite, and I'll serve it with a side and vegetable the girls like; or I'll make a plainer version of our dinner for them -- like, last night we had chili over polenta, but the girls just had polenta and vegetables, or when we have pesto pasta with shrimp (which oddly DD2 loves but DD1 hates), I'll leave some pasta plain for DD1.

If I want DD1 to try something new, I tell her she just has to try one bite. A lot of times she doesn't like it, and I'll have something simple ready as back-up, but sometimes she ends up loving it, like couscous and sugar snap peas.

To get her to finish her dinner, we got into the bad habit of offering her a treat and now try to encourage non-sweet treats, like a walk after dinner (at least when it was warmer) or a game before bedtime.

futrkingsley · November 2011

I try to make things I know he likes, with the stuff that is iffy on the side. I do not do any further negotiating -- I don't ask him to eat, no # of bites, etc. and we don't normally do desert. If we have desert (like a birthday cake), he gets it whether he eats dinner or not. Like many pp, I do a simpler version of most of our dinners for him since he has a preschoolers palatte and DH and I like spicier food. He rarely asks for anything else or changes his mind mid-meal. And if he doesn't eat, I don't force it and he has gone to bed without dinner plenty of times (like at least once a week). I don't make a big deal about it - I assume my kid knows when he is hungry and if he didn't eat, he must not be hungry. No big deal.

penguingrrl · November 2011

I offer one meal and if they don't eat I assume they aren't hungry. They aren't allowed to have anything but what I cook and if they don't eat dinner but want to eat later I reoffer their dinner plate.

I do make exceptions if it's something they have consistently tried and not liked (then I plan something else for them) or if it's a new thing and they give it a true try and just can't eat it. But otherwise one meal is offered, end of story.

Mrs Manners · November 2011

CD+AL:
Nope, at our house, you eat what I've fixed, or you don't eat. They aren't going to starve themselves, and I'm not a short-order cook or waitress. They might refuse to eat a time or two to see if you are serious, but it probably won't last long if you stick to your guns.

This. The only "exception" I make is that ds prefers his veggies raw so I pull out his portion prior to cooking ours. He still eats the same thing we eat, just raw, and it's no more trouble for me. Oh...and if we are having left overs, I do give him a choice between things that are already prepared (eg. Would you prefer chicken or steak?).

ETA: we don't do negotiations about what he eats or how much he eats. We do not do dessert.

MaybeMore · November 2011

You eat what's on the dinner table or you don't eat until bedtime snack. And the bedtime snack is because my kids tend to be crazy skinny.

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