Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
But lately, DD barely eats any of it. But she will ask for cheese, yogurt, fruit, etc.
Re: Another eating question...Will you let them eat whatever at dinner?
<><
Tizzle 10/07 ~ Boppy 7/09 ~ Chicken 1/12
Books read in 2013: ~ Audiobooks listened to in 2013: 3
Currently reading: The Fiery Cross by Diana Gabaldon
Currently listening to: The Dark Divine by Bree Despain
my currently-reading shelf:
Read the book "Child of Mine". It will help you relax about kids and food. It helped me a great deal.
I'm not a short-order cook. I cook one meal, UNLESS I know that they will absolutely, without a doubt, hate it (like lamb, etc.) Then, I make them something simple like pasta. If they don't like it, they are offered a slice of bread (nothing too appealing) or they go to bed hungry. My kids have gone without dinner MANY nights.
FWIW, I was a VERY picky eater as a kid and now eat pretty much anything, even things people think are GROSS (like bone marrow and intestine soup), so I'm not worried at all about my kids' eating habits.
Often, I either base our meals around what I know they already like -- like, we eat breaded chicken at least once a week because that's DD1's favorite, and I'll serve it with a side and vegetable the girls like; or I'll make a plainer version of our dinner for them -- like, last night we had chili over polenta, but the girls just had polenta and vegetables, or when we have pesto pasta with shrimp (which oddly DD2 loves but DD1 hates), I'll leave some pasta plain for DD1.
If I want DD1 to try something new, I tell her she just has to try one bite. A lot of times she doesn't like it, and I'll have something simple ready as back-up, but sometimes she ends up loving it, like couscous and sugar snap peas.
To get her to finish her dinner, we got into the bad habit of offering her a treat and now try to encourage non-sweet treats, like a walk after dinner (at least when it was warmer) or a game before bedtime.
I offer one meal and if they don't eat I assume they aren't hungry. They aren't allowed to have anything but what I cook and if they don't eat dinner but want to eat later I reoffer their dinner plate.
I do make exceptions if it's something they have consistently tried and not liked (then I plan something else for them) or if it's a new thing and they give it a true try and just can't eat it. But otherwise one meal is offered, end of story.
This. The only "exception" I make is that ds prefers his veggies raw so I pull out his portion prior to cooking ours. He still eats the same thing we eat, just raw, and it's no more trouble for me. Oh...and if we are having left overs, I do give him a choice between things that are already prepared (eg. Would you prefer chicken or steak?).
ETA: we don't do negotiations about what he eats or how much he eats. We do not do dessert.
TTC since 6/02 (age 22) K/U instantly despite no AF for 5 months--preemie baby boy 1/03
M/C 11/04 - M/C 05 - M/C 06 - BFP 2/08--fullterm baby girl 10/08 - M/C 4/11 - went to RE at age 31
DX: crappy quality & infrequent ovulation, mild MFI
Stimmed cycle #1 C/P 7/11 - Stimmed cycle #2 C/P 8/11 - Stimmed cycle #4 C/P 10/11
On Stimmed Cycle #5
Always thought I'd be a "mom of many"--now just hoping to be a "mom of one or two more!"