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Multiples
Developmental Delay in one twin?
Hi ladies! My twins will be 7 months old next week, and Elizabeth has been sitting for over a month, and is now trying to crawl. But Camille still hasn't even rolled all the way over. She just rolls onto her side. She is also nowhere near sitting--she can't even tripod. She's a tiny peanut--just under 12lbs--and I guess that has something to do with it. She just seems very weak.
She has a developmental evaluation with Early Steps today, and I am really nervous. I don't really know what to hope for. She has to be delayed by a certain amount to qualify for their program, so on one hand I am afraid that she WON'T qualify, and on the other I think "Well, why would I want her to qualify? If she doesn't, it means she's not that bad off." I am just a mix of emotions right now.
Has anyone else dealt with developmental delay with only one twin? What came of it? How long did it take for them to "catch up" to the other twin? And how the heck can I make myself stop comparing them against each other?
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Re: Developmental Delay in one twin?
Were your babies born early?
Both my boys are slightly delayed on gross motor. The physical therapist is confident they will fully catch up quickly with some help.
it is so hard not to compare them...but you shouldn't. they are 2 completely different individuals who will develop on their own timeslines.
we had my ava evaluated by ei at 22 months and she qualified for services...she walked at 16.5 months (her twin at 14.5) but we were concerned about some muscle tone/balance issues and she was delayed with her speech...after 6 months of services she is pretty much caught up with her gross/fine motor skills (altho her therapist still works with her on problem solving skills 2 times/month)...she is also almost caught up on her language/speech, but is still a bit behind her sister...she will keep receiving ST weekly til she's 3 I suspect and then if she isn't completely caught up we will go with a private ST (but her therapist and I suspect she will be pretty much caught up by then) she does lag a little behind her sister with some developmental things like problem solving skills and pretend play schemes (I"d say there is about a month between when they acquire a new skill) I try not to compare and just remind myself that as long as they are both progressing in their skills, that's all that really matters...
GL! my experience with EI has been a positive one (even tho I do find the evals to be a bit overwhelming)...all that matters is that you are getting your LO the extra help she may need...and from my experience the EI therapists have done a great job working with ava with milina there too...
We haven't dealt with an Early Intervention determined delay, but I will say that my LOs did a lot of early things at much different pace and almost always at the older end of the normal milestone timeline.
DD rolled at 6 months but DS didn't do it until 7 months. DS sat unassisted at 6 months, but DD could barely hold her head up at that point. She didn't sit unassisted until 8 months, which was starting to worry me. Then, one day at 8 months, she learned to crawl and sit up by herself all on the same day. However, DS wasn't even close to crawling at that point. He didn't crawl until after 10 months--two months after DD.
Now they are both almost 15 months and until a week ago, neither was walking. DD took her first steps last week and now she's really getting the hang of it. DS saw her do it, and now he's about a week behind her but catching up really fast. This is the first time they're doing a milestone at about the same time.
I'm not saying your DD might not have an actual delay, but I wouldn't be too concerned yet, although I know how hard that is. I spent many nights worrying about DD when she wouldn't sit upright. Good luck!
Gibby didn't roll until about 6.5mo... and didn't crawl until 11mo... Grayson was doing everything a month or 2 ahead of Gibby - mostly b/c Gibby was so much bigger/heavier.... but Gibby always seemed behind- he didn't smile or make eye contact much at all early on- i thought for sure he was on the spectrum (my dad and nephew both are so it's in the family).
But low and behold- Gibby was the first to talk, and took off and passed Grayson in a lot...
Gray ended up being evaluated at 18mo and had a delay in receptive and expressive speech. He got tubes in his ears to help his hearing - and has been going to speech therapy and doing great now.
it's hard not to compare them- i think we all do it- but eventually you'll be used to them being so different and not compare as much - and just enjoy who each of them is and not worry so much.
Do what is needed to make sure your kids get any help they need- and then just love who they are and where they are.
I have to say having Grayson a little "behind" makes him more like a baby still - and i enjoy that
Thank you so much, everyone! This makes me feel so much better...
Camille is also getting her helmet tomorrow, and I am afraid that will delay her even further. But I have heard they get used to it quickly, so I am crossing my fingers...