Facebook announcement?

zeitsev · November 2011

In the past few days I have been introduced to Faces of Loss Faces of Hope and at work this morning I presented on doula services and in the discussion miscarriage came up as something that should be shared more often. I personally didn't share my experience as it was a work event and as much as I love my job the work environment is one where people are often told their positions need to be dissolved for funding but then new people get hired out of the blue. I don't trust that by sharing they won't try to find a reason to get rid of me before I successfully get pregnant.

The site and this morning's event got me thinking though and I am contemplating sharing my story on the Faces website and then putting it out there on Facebook. Did anyone else share on Facebook? As of now just close family and friends know of our pregnancy and loss so I'm a little nervous about putting it out in to the world but do believe more people should be open about the common occurance of miscarriages.

lgmom2010 · November 2011

The only thing I put on FB was a poem. I did share my story with faces of loss and i have the link bookmarked but i dont know if im going to share it on FB bc i am friends with a lot of ppl i dont know that id feel comfortable sharing that with. I know that might seem strange bc I am sharing with complete strangers, but those ppl are more like acquaintances from my home town, and I just dont know how I feel about it. I have been sharing the link to my story with family and friends first though. It felt good to type it all out and put it up there. Maybe I can help another mother going through what I did/am.

BLT20051 · November 2011

I didn't. But no one knew I was pregnant either.

Maybe put it out there in a round about way? Like a quote and most people will get the hint and if anyone asks you can confirm their idea. Might be a little easier that way.

"Now I lay you down to sleep,
I pray the Lord your soul to keep;
Within his arms he'll hold you tight,
My Heavenly Angel, My Guiding Light."

"There is no foot so small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world"

"To Remember Is Painful
To Forget Is Impossible."
~Maureen Connelly

hopeful16 · November 2011

Only close friends and some family know about our losses. I haven't mentioned our losses or our struggles on FB. The thought has crossed my mind, but I never end up doing it. I can't decide if I want to let people into that part of my life. It is such a private and devastating time.

jhansen3 · November 2011

I have been very open about my losses with close friends and family. I feel it is important to talk about it and let other women know that it is a very common occurance that is devastating at every stage of pregnancy- but I am not comfortable posting my story on FB. I think it is great if you are secure in sharing your story that way!

ToiKenne · November 2011

I, too, have been fairly open with my friends and family about my loss but am not willing to share it with 225 of my closest "friends" on facebook. I am going to wait until I am well into a successful pregnancy and then maybe I'll post something like "After 30something months of marriage and <hopefully> one miscarriage, we are excited for the arrival of Baby Lastname in month!"

hopeful16 · November 2011

ToiKenne:
I, too, have been fairly open with my friends and family about my loss but am not willing to share it with 225 of my closest "friends" on facebook. I am going to wait until I am well into a successful pregnancy and then maybe I'll post something like "After 30something months of marriage and <hopefully> one miscarriage, we are excited for the arrival of Baby Lastname in month!"

I've thought of doing this too - only after the baby is born.---> 'After "3-or-so" years of marriage & three <hopefully no more> miscarriages, we're happy to announce the arrival of Baby ___.'

krissywave · November 2011

I know for us we had not told alot of people that we were pregnant. So for us to tell people we have lost is even harder. Some family members that we havnt even told yet and people have told them.

ToiKenne · November 2011

hopeful16:

ToiKenne:
I, too, have been fairly open with my friends and family about my loss but am not willing to share it with 225 of my closest "friends" on facebook. I am going to wait until I am well into a successful pregnancy and then maybe I'll post something like "After 30something months of marriage and <hopefully> one miscarriage, we are excited for the arrival of Baby Lastname in month!"

I've thought of doing this too - only after the baby is born.---> 'After "3-or-so" years of marriage & three <hopefully no more> miscarriages, we're happy to announce the arrival of Baby ___.'

Good call!

juliane2004 · November 2011

I put it on FB. I am super open and rarely DON'T post on facebook.

Laurakat81 · November 2011

After our second loss I wrote something like "today we found out our sweet baby is in heaven. This is the second baby we've lost this year. Please keep us in your prayers as we don't really know where to go from here." (I almost can't believe I remember that.) Only a small handful of friends knew about our first loss and about our second pregnancy but I just had this overwhelming urge to talk about it. I think I just desperately needed the support. And thankfully I got a ton of support.

I also wrote my story for Faces and shared it on FB. I've become pretty outspoken about it but it's still hard and occasionally awkward. But Im glad I'm "out".

KJohnson826 · November 2011

I had put my story on my facebook, since our pregnancy was quite a roller coaster, and we spilled the beans as soon as we found out we were pregnant I felt it was only fair to our friends and family be made aware of what happened. I write notes about what happened and how I am coping on mine fairly regularly. I find healing when I write, and I wear my heart/emotions on my sleeve, so sharing my story, and my feelings for me has been therapeutic.

sassafras007 · November 2011

https://facesofloss.com/2010/09/253.html

This is me...

butterfly843 · November 2011

I have a story up on the faces website, I put it up after my second loss. I'm open about my losses and do discuss them on fb from time to time. My first loss was later on so everyone knew I was pg already.

lgmom2010 · November 2011

Laurakat81:
After our second loss I wrote something like "today we found out our sweet baby is in heaven. This is the second baby we've lost this year. Please keep us in your prayers as we don't really know where to go from here." (I almost can't believe I remember that.) Only a small handful of friends knew about our first loss and about our second pregnancy but I just had this overwhelming urge to talk about it. I think I just desperately needed the support. And thankfully I got a ton of support.

I also wrote my story for Faces and shared it on FB. I've become pretty outspoken about it but it's still hard and occasionally awkward. But Im glad I'm "out".

what's your faces link?

Laurakat81 · November 2011

lgmom2010:
Laurakat81:
After our second loss I wrote something like "today we found out our sweet baby is in heaven. This is the second baby we've lost this year. Please keep us in your prayers as we don't really know where to go from here." (I almost can't believe I remember that.) Only a small handful of friends knew about our first loss and about our second pregnancy but I just had this overwhelming urge to talk about it. I think I just desperately needed the support. And thankfully I got a ton of support.

I also wrote my story for Faces and shared it on FB. I've become pretty outspoken about it but it's still hard and occasionally awkward. But Im glad I'm "out".

what's your faces link?

I can't make it clicky on my iPad but here it is.

https://facesofloss.com/2010/09/236.html#more-236

CnAnA · November 2011

I had posted about being pregnant just a week (if that) before, so yes, I put the m/c on FB too. I just said "apparently it's not time for us to have a take home baby. Blood tests confirm I am no longer pregnant." Luckily the friends on FB that are more like people I used to be close with rather than actual friends had the decency to stay off the post, or just post their condolences, and not say anything else about it. Most of my FB friends that are actually friends emailed or texted me to say how sorry they were. It meant a lot to have that support system, even if I wasn't ready to face them or talk to them. Just knowing i *could* helped.

zeitsev · November 2011

Thank you for all of the responses! After reading through them and talking with my husband I decided to submit our story to Faces and will post the link on fb. For us, we feel strongly that if our story will help just one couple now, years from now, or ones that only hear our story through word-of-mouth, feel less alone than we have done good.

I'm so sad any of us go through this and my heart breaks every time I see a new intro in this board. Why must this happen to so many?

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