Has IF made you re-think your "I'll never..."s ?

limpetfan · November 2011

I've been thinking a lot lately about things I swore I'd never do just to get pregnant... and how I've pretty much reversed myself on every.single.one. For example, I used to think acupuncture was a load of... well, you know... and now I'm definitely planning to use it between now and my next IVF cycle. Also (and sorry for the repetition if you read my blog), I used to think eating organically and worrying about chemicals like BPA was silly... not so much anymore. I think it speaks to my growing desperation to make sure my next treatment cycle is the last treatment cycle I go through.

Does anyone else feel like infertility has caused you to re-think the things you promised you'd never do?

Edited, because the more I think about it, the more I feel "stoop to" was not what I really meant, and I don't want anyone to think I meant changing your opinions is wrong.

pantsarella · November 2011

I honestly never thought I'd do IVF. Not that I saw it as something that others "stoop" to, but I just thought that I'd take it as a sign that if we couldn't get pregnant without serious intervention, that we weren't supposed to have children. But DH and I would be amazing parents, I know it in my heart. And he's willing to do everything to have kids, or give up the dream if I say I've had enough.

I've always believed in eating organic (although I don't do it as much as I should), and avoiding extra chemicals. I've also started eating healthier, which I didn't plan on ever doing until I was actually pregnant.

sarahtoledo · November 2011

I used to think I would never give myself a shot, and then thought I would never do IVF. Now I've given myself countless shots (I have two full sharps containers) and would've done IVF if I could've afforded it.

TJ1979 · November 2011

Sorry, this turned out longer than I intended.

I don't want to say there are things I didn't think I'd "stoop" to, but yes, it has made me change my whole way of life. I also always thought organic was just code for 'more expensive' and therefore pointless. And I thought things like low carb diets were unhealthy. But there's also a big difference between eating less carbs when you have PCOS and doing the whole eat-all-the-bacon-and-cheese-you-can-because-they're-low-carb dieting. I'm also considering acupuncture too. I don't thing those things are necessarily wrong, they just aren't things I was into. And now, I'm willing to try anything, to make every change I can to increase my chances. I've even given up drinking during the 2ww - and that's something I just never thought I would have to do. Don't get me wrong, I'm not an alcoholic. But all of my friends continued to have a glass of wine with dinner when they were trying to conceive, and I'd even had friends tell me that (cringe) it helped them to relax and get pregnant quicker. So I just didn't think about it. But my RE is adamant about no alcohol during the 2ww, and I abide by that. But it just feels weird to go out to dinner with friends and be the only one having water instead of wine.

limpetfan · November 2011

TJ1979:
I don't want to say there are things I didn't think I'd "stoop" to, but yes, it has made me change my whole way of life. I also always thought organic was just code for 'more expensive' and therefore pointless. And I thought things like low carb diets were unhealthy. But there's also a big difference between eating less carbs when you have PCOS and doing the whole eat-all-the-bacon-and-cheese-you-can-because-they're-low-carb dieting. I'm also considering acupuncture too. I don't thing those things are necessarily wrong, they just aren't things I was into. And now, I'm willing to try anything, to make every change I can to increase my chances. I've even given up drinking during the 2ww - and that's something I just never thought I would have to do. Don't get me wrong, I'm not an alcoholic. But all of my friends continued to have a glass of wine with dinner when they were trying to conceive, and I'd even had friends tell me that (cringe) it helped them to relax and get pregnant quicker. So I just didn't think about it. But my RE is adamant about no alcohol during the 2ww, and I abide by that. But it just feels weird to go out to dinner with friends and be the only one having water instead of wine.

The bold part is precisely how I feel, too, about the things I've changed

Mitzi Bishi · November 2011

Clearly I never wanted to do fertility meds, although who does?

I've given myself daily injections and undergone two ER's in a foreign country.

I've considered asking my gay best friend for sperm.

I've considered asking a sister / family member to be a surrogate.

I've considered going to India to pursue more IVF.

I've considered using a surrogate in India.

I've considered what it would take to adopt, seeing as it would be a 3rd country to add to our tangled web of difficulty as it already is.

This has clearly taught me, although I didn't really need the lesson, that you can't judge someone or their situation until you are knee deep in it yourself. It's also taught me how crucial education and legislation are for things like this.

farmerlynda · November 2011

Mitzi Bishi:
Clearly I never wanted to do fertility meds, although who does?
I've given myself daily injections and undergone two ER's in a foreign country.
I've considered asking my gay best friend for sperm.
I've considered asking a sister / family member to be a surrogate.
I've considered going to India to pursue more IVF.
I've considered using a surrogate in India.
I've considered what it would take to adopt, seeing as it would be a 3rd country to add to our tangled web of difficulty as it already is.
This has clearly taught me, although I didn't really need the lesson, that you can't judge someone or their situation until you are knee deep in it yourself. It's also taught me how crucial education and legislation are for things like this.

This is so true. I remember interviewing a local family with triplets for the newspaper (on an unrelated topic), and thinking "crazy -- this is what is wrong with ART." Now I realize: hey, she just implanted 2 embies, which is a totally reasonable and rational choice to make... and both happened to take, and one happened to split. There is absolutely no reason to judge that choice, or that outcome.

As for the original question, a thousand times yes! MH and I are both very natural, crunchy sort of people... we have always tried to avoid unnecessary medicine and go the natural route whenever possible. Well, after more than a year of the natural route (including supplements, herbs, acupuncture, yoga, you name it), it is just not working. So we're going to pump my body full of hormones and make a baby in a petri dish, because we want to start a family, dammit! And if I had it my way, I'd probably put back 2 embies, just like the mother of triplets did... because that 10% jump in success rate actually makes it worth the risk to me. My husband and my doctor are more logical though, so I guess we'll be doing SET.

limpetfan · November 2011

Mitzi Bishi:
Clearly I never wanted to do fertility meds, although who does?
I've given myself daily injections and undergone two ER's in a foreign country.
I've considered asking my gay best friend for sperm.
I've considered asking a sister / family member to be a surrogate.
I've considered going to India to pursue more IVF.
I've considered using a surrogate in India.
I've considered what it would take to adopt, seeing as it would be a 3rd country to add to our tangled web of difficulty as it already is.

These are things on my list, too. It's amazing the things we'll consider if the end result is the child we've been longing to have.

LyssRob · November 2011

Before going off BCP, my husband and I actually talked about that we never wanted to actively "try" to get pregnant (ie, IM OVULATING, COME HOME ASAP!)

How naive of me.

huco30 · November 2011

Yes, it has changed my "I'll never do's." When I was really young (like in college) before I was married, before I knew I'd have IF issues, I thought I would never use fertility drugs. Well I have been on clomid for a long time. I have also considered adoption and IVF, if I could afford them, especially IVF. If I could afford IVF I would do it tomorrow. I have also considered getting my BFF to be my surrogate. She offered when we started IF treatments, hopefully that offer still stands if we need it. I don't even know how that would work or how much that would cost, although I would love to experience pregnancy myself.

Gregermis · November 2011

Never thought I'd do IVF or acupuncture..... be here I am........

maggie2324 · November 2011

I naively thought that I'd never be in this situation. I never even considered us having issues. I always understood people who did fertility treatments because I knew that I would do it if I was in their situation. I just never in a million years expected to be in this situation.

genmalone · November 2011

I've done all kinds of things I thought/said I would never do. My DH and I decided before we started TTC that if it didn't happen for us we would move on. I always said that not having a baby wouldn't be the end of my world. Well, I was wrong because I've almost lost my mind over it several times.

Things I didn't thing I'd do to get KU:

Acupuncture

Chinese Herbs

Fertility Treaments in general

Injectibles (I thought this seemed kinda crazy)

IVF (we would of done it already if we weren't 100% OOP)

Drinking decaf

Jezebell26 · November 2011

I know what you mean, but don't know if im ready to change that much. Of course I hear accupuncture can help and eating this or that can help, but then i think about all the other people who get pregnant from IVF who don't do any of that stuff. For me, personally, ive made enough changes in my daily life to accommodate IVF and doing something else because maybe it might help doesnt seem logical to me. I swore id never do injections and never go through IVF, and well here we are. Of course this is just my opinion and i admire anyone who makes those lifestyle changes. I am eating healthier and am exercising to help myself. I am taking vitamins and doing what the drs think are best. I also ate the pineapple for implantation. I say do what you are comfortable with and if it interests you, then go for it! Also wanted to say best of luck on your upcoming cycle! *hugs*

eponine7682 · November 2011

Absolutely. I never ever thought I would do IVF. But then again, I never imagined I would have to. I always said that I wouldn't want to take any kind of drug that could increase chances of multiples either, but here I am fully ready to go into IVF and transfer 2 embies! LOL, but I feel like that is what I want now. I think that while IF is a terrible experience to go through, I am thankful that I have this new perspective on life and what a miracle conceiving and giving birth truly is.

AKB090609 · November 2011

Sort of, when we firts started TTC DH's family were planing on taking all of us (MIL, FIL, BIL+FI, DH and I) on a trip to Alaska. We planned on going July of 2010 fine by us, I might be PG but I would still be able to enjoy the trip. Then BIL's FI wanted to do it in 2011, I flat out said no thinking We would have a young child and it would be too big of a trip.

Needles to say we could have done the trip this year, I am glad we went when we did BIL+ FI did not join us so it was much better.

Now we plan trips and things on much shorter notice so we know that we will be in the clear treatment wise.

kz's_girlygirl · November 2011

I have definitely made a lot of changes all in the name of fertility. Acupuncture and low impact exercise over jogging or using the elliptical machine have been two things.

I've also dramatically altered the way I look at food. I shop at the farmers market for most of my groceries, and try to buy organic produce and meat as often as possible. I've also gone gluten-free and cut way back on any dairy that is made from cow's milk. I don't have any food allergies, so there are times I eat an entire bag of cheetos (like last night!) but I am definitely more picky about what I eat and what I cook with.

De-caf has become a staple, and alcohol is a no-no for me when I'm on a medicated cycle, and during the 2ww if I'm on a break.

I've also become more picky about what products I put on my skin. Shampoo.lotion etc. I can't break my makeup addiction though!

All of these changes have made me feel better physically, and as cheesy as this sounds, eating local organic food and buying it from the people who grow/make is has really made me feel better mentally and more connected to...something. I still haven't gotten pregnant though.

DH says I've really embraced my hippy roots. I don't know about that, but I have definitely become more conscientious and focused on being as 'natural' as possible.

TJ1979 · November 2011

eponine7682:
Absolutely. I never ever thought I would do IVF. But then again, I never imagined I would have to. I always said that I wouldn't want to take any kind of drug that could increase chances of multiples either, but here I am fully ready to go into IVF and transfer 2 embies! LOL, but I feel like that is what I want now. I think that while IF is a terrible experience to go through, I am thankful that I have this new perspective on life and what a miracle conceiving and giving birth truly is.

That is so true. I think having a baby is something that most people take for granted. It's not so easy as grow up, get married, have baby. Not for everyone at least. I know that my husband and I both have become much more patient, kind, and considerate of what other people might be going through since we've joined the IF journey.

Want a personalized experience?

Has IF made you re-think your "I'll never..."s ?

Re: Has IF made you re-think your &quot;I'll never...&quot;s ?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Want a personalized experience?

Has IF made you re-think your &quot;I'll never...&quot;s ?

Re: Has IF made you re-think your &amp;quot;I'll never...&amp;quot;s ?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Has IF made you re-think your "I'll never..."s ?

Re: Has IF made you re-think your "I'll never..."s ?