Typical Age Range for Separation Anxiety?

je2161 · November 2011

DD has always been quite attached to me, and I love it... most of the time.

However, it has come to the point where if she sees me leaving the room, she will start to cry. Not whine or fuss, but all-out-CRY hard!

If we are hanging out in one room, and I need to take care of something in another room, I will try to quietly exit on tip-toe. Or if she spots me leaving and is about to wail, I will talk loudly to her from the other room and that sometimes helps a bit.

How long does this type of anxiety last? Anyone else dealing with this? How do you manage the situation?

skio · November 2011

At about 7m, C started with the separation anxiety. Except it's not me she's attached to, it's anyone. She just doesn't want to be alone and will scream if I (or daddy or grandma or whoever) leaves her in a room by herself. Sometimes she cries if you even turn your back to her.

I try to take her wherever I'm going. If I have to be in the kitchen, she's in the walker or high chair. If I'm in the loving room, she's in her jumperoo or on the floor. If I have to do stuff in my bedroom, she comes with me. When I do have to leave, though, I talk to her from the other room to let her know I'm still nearby.

I believe it was Ferber's book that said sneaking away from a baby is never a good idea, because it makes them lose trust in you. One second you're there, the next you're gone and they're scared. He recommended allowing the baby to be aware that you're leaving the room (in reference to leaving the baby to fall asleep, but I think the same notion goes for separation anxiety). I like to tell her that I'm leaving and will be right back, then talk to her from the other room.

DucatiLeah · November 2011

Don't sneak away. Like pp said, be open and honest about what you are doing. I tell my LO I am going potty, folding laundry, etc and that she is welcome to follow or I will be right back depending. If I am just outside the room, I talk to her and tell her to come get me if she is lonely. She can learn to make the choice to follow or play on her own and know where I am. She obviously needs help understanding at this point, but I believe in communicating as much as posssible so she can learn. I also distract jer with toys that will keep her attention better, like her talking books and things like that.

je2161 · November 2011

DucatiLeah:
Don't sneak away. Like pp said, be open and honest about what you are doing. I tell my LO I am going potty, folding laundry, etc and that she is welcome to follow or I will be right back depending. If I am just outside the room, I talk to her and tell her to come get me if she is lonely. She can learn to make the choice to follow or play on her own and know where I am. She obviously needs help understanding at this point, but I believe in communicating as much as posssible so she can learn. I also distract jer with toys that will keep her attention better, like her talking books and things like that.

I don't know how old your LO is, but mine is not yet able to crawl or walk so she cannot follow me. Nor can she understand exactly what I am saying.

As I mentioned previously, I do talk to her from another room when possible. And I carry her around as much as possible too. But when mommy has to use the bathroom, and LO cannot come along, it's either: A. listen to her scream at the top of her lungs until I get back, or B. tip-toe out of the room so I can get 5 minutes to myself and she can continue playing with her toys. I vote for B !

je2161 · November 2011

skio:

At about 7m, C started with the separation anxiety. Except it's not me she's attached to, it's anyone. She just doesn't want to be alone and will scream if I (or daddy or grandma or whoever) leaves her in a room by herself. Sometimes she cries if you even turn your back to her.

I try to take her wherever I'm going. If I have to be in the kitchen, she's in the walker or high chair. If I'm in the loving room, she's in her jumperoo or on the floor. If I have to do stuff in my bedroom, she comes with me. When I do have to leave, though, I talk to her from the other room to let her know I'm still nearby.

I believe it was Ferber's book that said sneaking away from a baby is never a good idea, because it makes them lose trust in you. One second you're there, the next you're gone and they're scared. He recommended allowing the baby to be aware that you're leaving the room (in reference to leaving the baby to fall asleep, but I think the same notion goes for separation anxiety). I like to tell you I'll be right back, then talk to her from the other room.

I've done this too. I leave various toys and safe places for her to hang out in each room of the house so now we travel around the house together for the most part.

vilaro · November 2011

My DD, too. I can't walk out of a room without the whining starting almost instantly an then quickly devolving into full on cry if I don't return within a minute. She's always been like that. I just have to take her everywhere I go. Stinks for now but I figure she'll grow out of it at some point.

NeroDoo · November 2011

This was brought up on the AP board recently. I found this link helpful.

https://www.positive-parenting-ally.com/baby-separation-anxiety.html

MsJosie · November 2011

My LO screams at the top of her lungs too if I'm more than 2 feet away from her no matter what. Solution: I just carry her around with me and have learned to do soo much stuff one handed! I feel like super mom!! It my be weird but I like the feeling of being wanted and how attached to me she is. She is my mini me!!! Oh, and she will not sit and play on the floor unless I am there with her. If I do have to leave without her I ALWAYS kiss her goodbye and tell her I'll be back soon, I never sneak out. She loves my dad soo much that she usually is fine if he is with her while I am gone.

Want a personalized experience?

Typical Age Range for Separation Anxiety?

Re: Typical Age Range for Separation Anxiety?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards