I just have a question, but I'm gonna give some background info first...
Ok, let me start off by saying that I'm NOT expecting at the moment. I actually miscarried about 3 months ago so a pregnancy is not something I'll be experiencing anytime soon, BUT...The reason for my post is this....
1st pregnancy--Dialated to 4cm on my own throughout last 3 weeks of pregnancy. Was induced the day before my EDD due to high BP...After 12 hrs of labor I had only dialated to 6cm and my cervix was swelling around DDs head. Midwife determined that DD was too large and I ended up having a VERY unwanted c-section.
My recovery was HORRIBLE. My incision had burst within 2 weeks of the c-section, I had a severe infection and ended up in the ER more than 6 times clear up until 10 months pp trying to clear up the infections and issues. I am BEYOND tramatized from all the pain and horrible experiences I've had since the c-section. I even said numberous times that I didn't want to have anymore kids if I had to have a c-section....I flat out do NOT want another one....Well...
2nd Pregnancy--Went in for first appt and I TRIED to explain how determained I was to at LEAST have a trail labor. Midwife flatout refused to listen to my concerns and feelings and basically said that I was going to have a RCS. She never even gave me a "real" reason and honestly said, "Well, you had a c-section the first time and there's risks. Most of the time the second baby is bigger than the first and since that was an issue the first time we're just going to schedule the c-section at 39 weeks"....
I left there in tears and honestly stressed myself SO much to the point I couldn't sleep and was terrified to have the baby because of what I'd gone through. I don't see the harm in at least TRYING to have a VBAC. If what she said is true, and the baby is too large, then fine, do the c-section. But since that's the ONLY reason I had one the first time, why can't I just try?....
So, I've decided that if and when we try for another one, I don't want to go back to that Midwife. They were great when I was pregnant with DD but the total lack of understanding when trying to talk to them totally turned me off. I REALLY wanna try for a VBAC....
My question is, I live in a small town and chances are, I'm gonna have to go to a larger town for a Midwife or OB that's willing to do a VBAC. How can I find one that will allow it? Do I just need to call around and/or interveiw them until I find one? I'm just not sure...
TIA....
Re: Finding a OB/Midwife that will allow a VBAC....
I agree that some ICAN chapters are pushy for HBACs(mine included). I VBACed with a really supportive midwife in a hospital that I found through a referral from my old midwives (who were not allowed to attend VBACs via hopsital policy and told me that a VBAC with one of the OBs at that hospital was not likely). I interviewed her and an OB and found that while both were open and honest, I needed the care of a midwife (even the OB who I interviewed said that he thought I'd be disappointed in OB care and might prefer a midwife!)
Ask around, google, interview. Get all your ducks in a row before the pregnancy so you don't have the stress. Good luck!
I started my search with ICAN, the Bump and asking around for suggestions. I called a few practices and asked some questions. Just based on how they answered my initial questions, I could determine if they were worth meeting. In the end, I chose the same midwife as MAPrincess.
I also wanted to say that you are absolutely correct to find a new provider. You will not get a VBAC with your midwife. And she's giving you a bunch of garbage excuses. I strongly believe we don't grow babies that are too large for us to birth.
I'm sorry for your loss.
First of all, I am so sorry for your loss and I am sorry for your horrible birth experience. I can definitely see why you are looking for something different this time.
I definitely think asking your local ICAN chapter and trying to find someone through word of mouth is the best choice.
For me, I looked at the midwife clinic that was affiliated with my PCP's clinic. Then I looked through the profiles of the midwives, and came across one who had a VBAC herself. Then I had my initial visit with her and loved her and loved their group's VBAC stats.