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Separation anxiety tips?

mrsocmrsoc
in Upstate NY Babies
E had a little bit of separation anxiety before A was born, but after he was born it skyrocketed.  I am guessing from the hospital stay?  It has gotten much better with the family that babysits him for us when we go out, which is typically either grandmother.  He still has it pretty bad at the nursery at church and we just joined the Y and it is really bad there.  It breaks my heart, but I know that kids go through this.  I talked to his pediatrician about it and she said to keep going, keep the visits short (which I have been, about 45 minutes) and that he will eventually get used to it....oh, and not to talk about when we are going ahead of time so that he does not get worked up about it before.  Any tips from you all?  I wondered if there was a kid's book out there that would address this as he loves to read books and it might put it in terms that he understands?  
imageimage PHOTO Credit: Meryl :)Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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Re: Separation anxiety tips?

  • TinyPinkBugTinyPinkBug member

    imagemrsoc:
     ....oh, and not to talk about when we are going ahead of time so that he does not get worked up about it before.  

    I'm sorry, it is so hard.  But this  not talking about it in advance is interesting because this is the exact opposite of what we (me, behavior specialist and school staff) do and have found works for Tyler.  I guess it is one of those no one size fits all type things.  We do chose our words very carefully, stay away from words like miss you, sad, gone...  Like we never say babysit, but instead say someone is coming to play.  Instead of saying what I am going to do while away, we tell the kids what THEY are going to do while we are away.  So like instead of saying it is time for Mommy to go work out, say it is time for you to play with Grandma and Mommy will see you in a short while.  Sometimes we tell them a time frame how it relates to a show, like we will see you in the time it takes to watch 2 Blues Clues episodes.  I know to also be quick and confident when you leave, don't drag it out and let them know you are sad too, this is my HUGE downfall.  Hope it gets better soon.

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  • mrsocmrsoc
    I think that she said this because we were discussing it with him ahead of time, thinking we were preparing him, but he would get really sad ahead of time. It seems that once the first few minutes are over he is fine, until about 10 minutes before we pick him up.  We are quick about drop off.  We always tell him he is going to play with the kids.  When we go to get him we always tell him how we will always be back for him, he is safe, and give him lots of love.  Hopefully he copes with this better.  It just breaks my heart.... 
    imageimage PHOTO Credit: Meryl :)Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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