Intro...Will you have me over here?

vanessa lynne · November 2011

Hello Girls!

Most of you know me from TTCAL..but those that dont...

My name is Vanessa. I met Mikey(DH) 7 years ago and we got married May 3rd 2009. I came off BCP January 2010 and we started "really" TTC in March of 2010. That summer I got a slight + on a hpt and AF came the next day. I had no idea that it was a CP. At that time I had no idea what that even meant..so I didn't tell anyone. Finally November 28th 2010 I got my BFP. We were so happy. I had spotting and some bleeding episodes through my 1st and 2nd tri. I would go in for u/s and they would tell me the baby was fine every time..they always said it was from sex. . I had been telling the doc office for 2 wks that I had some extreme sharp pains and they said I was constipated..and told me to take milk of magnesia and a suppository. Tongue Tied On March 28th 2011 I was still having some spotting and some cramping as well. I went in for an u/s..this time Mike did not come with me because it had become so frequent and I just went with my brothers young fiance. The tech said my cervix looked short and she couldnt see any bleeding. "of course the spotting always stopped when I went in" I asked her what a shortening cervix meant and she said sometimes it means you are going into labor..but not to worry..that wouldnt be the case. I would be 22 weeks tomorrow. I suggested I see the doctor..she was only 2 doors down..they said no need and sent me home to wait for an appointment for a level 2 u/s. No bed rest or anything. I went home thinking everything was fine and that I must have indeed been "just" constipated. They made me feel stupid and really brushed me off...kind of like "oh you again" every time I was there. I woke up the next morning at 3:30 with cramps. I tried my hardest to fall back asleep but woke Mikey up in the process. He started timing me when I would moan with a "cramp" and said he thought we should call the doctor. We finally did..me feeling silly about calling at 5am. The answering service said a doc would call me right away. 1 hr went by with no call. Mike made the decision to go to the hospital..he knew something wasnt right. Finally I spoke to someone on the phone while on route to hospital. They were like "Why are you calling if you are going to the hospital anyway" real rude. Some strange doc told me she would alert L&D that I was on my way. I was so nervous I needed to use the Br as soon as we got there..apparently I was no longer "constipated" and thats when I noticed all the blood. We made it up to L&D and everyone assured me I was ok. Until a doctor examined me..and I saw the look of sadness in his eyes.(ironically he was my mom's OB as well as Mikes Noni) BTW..my OB NEVER SHOWED! I was having full blown contractions and had no idea..they tried to stop them with magnesium.The doc from my OB's office "Douchecanoe" told me.. "You are going to deliver this baby today and we will not try to save him" He said to make arrangements with my husband. A counselor came in to discuss funeral arrangements..REALLY!!?? I never lost hope. But just as he said, I delivered my precious Aidan at 11:32am. He was perfect and his heart was beating strong. They took him away and Mikey watched as he gasped for air and no one helped. I held him until he flew to heaven at 12:56pm. March 29th 2011..Best and Worst day of my life.

A little extra about me. At my 1st u/s they discovered I had a fibroid behind me uterus. The doc assured me it was fine and wouldnt affect the baby or the pg. The day I was released from the hospital she said that may have been the cause and I would have to have it removed..she also said I may have been in labor for a week. I later found out it took everything in my Mother not to jump over the hospital bed and strangle that ***! After the funeral I went in for a postpartum check up and they discovered placenta that hadnt passed. I refused the D&C and was put on some pill to cause contractions..I forget what it was called..Im sure you ladies know what it is..began with M. The doctor went on a nice vaca with her family while I was on it..and I barely remember..Mikey said I was so loopy on it. I did fall in the kitchen and ended up with a broken coccyx. Since then I have been seeing a new OB and MFM doc. They say the fibroid was not the culprit for the PTL and they will not take it out. Taking it out will only "open up a can of worms" they said. I will be put on the 17P injection when I get pg starting at 12wks-34 weekly. We TTA the 1st month. I am on my 7th cycle TTCAL. My doc wants me to start testing. We are making an appt for a SA for Mikey and when I tried to make appointment for me as well they don't take my insurance...Wonderful! Super Angry Since I have been charting we are sure of O every month..but my OB sugg. a dye/saline test to see if anything is blocking my tubes. I hope I can find a place that takes my insurance. So..that is where we are at the moment. Just getting over the lightest AF I have ever had and finding a fertility specialist just to get the ball rolling. Sorry this was so long. I hope you'll still have me. Help yourself to a pair of shoes and a cupcake!

Carolee · November 2011

Welcome over here, although I'm sorry you have to be here. (((HUGS))). I'm so sorry for your loss.

lavril · November 2011

Welcome to the board. I'm so sorry for all that you've been through. I hope you find a caring and supportive RE to help you through ttcal and an OB to support you through your next pregnancy. You deserve way better care than you received before!

butterfly843 · November 2011

((Hugs)) I'm so sorry for everything you've been through. I switched dr's after I lost my twins also. Welcome to the board. Cupcakes and shoes are my favorite, I actually bought a silver pair like that the other day.