Pre-School and Daycare

Night time potty training help needed! (sorry, I'm sure this gets asked alot)

DD will be 4 in a couple of weeks and is still wearing Pull Ups at night. She has expressed an interest in wearing underpants to bed, so we've started waking her up 3-4 times a night to go and we've been pretty successful in regards to waking up dry in the morning. I just have a couple of questions. 1. Is 4 too old to still be wearing Pull Ups at night? 2. How long does it normally take to transition to underpants from Pull Ups? 3. Do you have any other tips or ideas you can share? I know this whole process will take some time, but I appreciate any thoughts or suggestions you ladies may have. Thanks! ***excuse any format issues, posting from my phone***
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Re: Night time potty training help needed! (sorry, I'm sure this gets asked alot)

  • I think it's really hard to "train" at night- after several weeks of waking dry and reusing a pull-up a few nights in a row when they were dry, I just tried undies and she's done great.  I've known kids MUCH older who had issues at night, so 4 isn't too old.  Just tell her if she can stay dry for X days, she can wear undies to bed.  See if that helps motivate and a potty chair next to her bed could help too.
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  • I'm a self admitted potty training nazi.  

    What I've learned from experience is that you really can't train overnight.

    Some kids sleep heavier than others and it's a matter of the synapses in the brain developing to the point that the bladder signal can reach the brain and then the brain in turn can wake the child because of the urge.  For lighter sleepers they can do the overnight thing younger.  Heaver sleepers can take longer to get there.

    For mine it was more a matter of when their bladders were big enough to hold it all the way thru the night because neither of mine are terribly motivated to get out of bed in the middle of the night to pee.  Think about it.... how often do you get up in the middle of the night to pee (when not pregnant)?  Most hold it until waking in the morning.

    My oldest didn't overnight train until 5 and I tried EVERYTHING.  My pedi told me to back off and let it happen when his body was capable.  My youngest overnight trained before 3.  It's a very kid specific thing.

    I recommend that you stop the waking her to pee thing.  It gets them dry in the morning but it doesn't really teach them anything and it's disrupting everyone's sleep.  

    Cut back liquids in the evening, have her pee before and after bath and then again right before bed to empty the bladder as well as you can and then just wait.  Eventually she'll start having dry pull ups in the AM.  For us when we hit 5 dry days we tried underwear (with a sheet protector/ultimate crib sheet to minimize clean up for accidents).  An accident meant back into pull ups until another dry day.

    She'll get there.

    Leaver her in the pull ups and wait for her to start waking up dry in the AM.  It'll happen...  I promise! 

    Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
    Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
  • As pp said, it's totally developmental.  If her body isn't waking her up to pee, she's not ready- even if she were 4 1/2+.  I definitely wouldn't wake her at night to pee.  Her body needs to learn to do that on its own.  It sounds like you could develop some scary sleep habits by doing that... Another thing that worked for a friend is she let her son wet the bed a few times.  He hated it and learned to not do it.  For my DD, we'd try panties at night after a night of a dry pull up.  If she wet them a couple times we'd get the pull ups back out for a couple months.  It was hard being patient, but it was so clear that it wasn't her fault and there was nothing she could do about it.  A few weeks ago we tried it again and I think we've had 2 accidents in 3-4 weeks.  She hates it and gets upset, and I am very calm about it because she feels bad enough.  I feel like she's ready this time, but really wasn't in August.  Also, she holds it til morning.  Usually she calls for me about an hour before it's time to get up.  It's definitely a brain + bladder muscle formula that just has to be ready.  
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  • If she's peeing 3-4 times at night she's not ready.  Neither of my boys are night trained.  My oldest started taking off his diapers/pull ups ect in the middle of the night and the peeing in bed so we do the bathroom thing but we only have to take him once for him to make it through the night.  My younger one on the other hand is dry every once in a while and I wouldn't be surprised if he night trains prior to my oldest.  Limit liquids, pee before bed and if you do books and she doesn't fall asleep during then try again after books.  If she would do well with it you could try a little potty in her room and then phase that out.
  • Take it from a mom of older kids (one of whom became night dry at the same time she was potty trained for day and one of whom still has night accidents at age 7) that:

    --it's pretty normal for 4 y/o kids to still wet the bed.

    --wearing pull ups is a perfectly acceptable way to deal with it, as long as it doesn't encourage more wetting just because it's easier to pee in a pull up and go back to sleep than it is to get up and head for the bathroom.  

    --most kids who wet at night are doing it because they are such sound sleepers that the "gotta pee" signal isn't strong enough to wake the child up.  Waking her up to pee 2 or 3 times at night will enable her to keep her panties dry, but it probably won't "train" her to wake up on her own.  It's not like daytime potty training in this way.

    --most kids grow out of this stage in the preschool years as their bladders get bigger and their brains mature a little more so that the "gotta pee" signal can wake them up.  Some continue to occasionally wet the bed until they're in later elementary school.

     

    High School English teacher and mom of 2 kids:

    DD, born 9/06/00 -- 12th grade
    DS, born 8/25/04 -- 7th grade
  • It is very hard to night time potty train. It is developmental and happens for each child at different times.

    DS turned 4 in April and started staying dry and sleeping in underwear this summer. He would beg to sleep in underwear and I tried telling him that he needed to stay dry for X amount of days. We limited his liquid intake, made him go potty(at least try) before and after bath and again before bed so 3 times in about 2 hours. He still woke up wet 5-6 days/week. We did try to wake him when we would go to bed as well but he is such a heavy sleeper that it did not work. I asked the pedi about it at his 4yr appt. She said a lot of children are still sleeping in pull ups at age 4 and not to worry about it or push it.

    DD potty trained at 19 months and was sleeping in panties by 20 months. She has had 1 accident at night since and that was in her floor because she woke up but didn't make it to the potty in time.

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  • Mine is also almost 4 and I haven't given it a bit of thought to get her out of her overnight pull-ups. She just LOVES to wake-up with a dry pull-up where she can "see the hearts" (ours have hearts that disappear when the diaper gets warm from the pee) and she's had a good streak here and there - but she was wet today and very disappointed. She kept saying that she didn't pee at all and I knew it was becuase she is such a heavy sleep she never realized it.
    My darling daughter just turned 4 years old.
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