Northern California Babies

**UPDATED**Need Some *Put Your Big Girl Panties On And Dont Cry* Dust

Today is Cooper's 1st appointment with a Pediatric Psychiatrist @ UC Davis. It is a 2 hour face to face appointment with her. I have not told my pedi that I was taking him here. But I really think I need another set of eyes to look at him. I also feel that a Psych is better equipt to manage Cooper's meds. His chewing is the worse it has ever been.

What I am afraid of, is have this appointment bring out all my emotion. I remember the first time we went to the neurologist and I got 1/2 a sentance into the conversation and started crying and begging him to help my boy.

I know that there are children with much worse problems/issues than Coopers but I am just so sad for him. He is such a sweet and loving child...and I feel like an aweful parent for not always handling it/him with patience and grace.

I really do not even know what to say in todays appointment. Do I ask to have all of his DX's re-evaluated. Maybe he doesnt really have Aspergers. Maybe it is me just not wanting him to have it. Maybe I want him to have something to explain why he does what he does and behaves the way he does. I do plan on asking if this Doctor can assist us in getting in to the MIND Institute. I know there is something not right because I just got a copy of the OT evaluation from the school district...and he has some moderate to severe issues that will be addressed.

I really could use an angel on my shoulder today as I am going at this alone. Sorry for the rambling...

*******Update*******

 So the appointment today was amazing! We sat with a resident Psychiatrist for 1.5 hours just talking about Cooper She took a complete history from womb to now. After asking a ton of questions and being so patient with Cooper's interuptions, she consulted with the head Doc. He came in and introduced himself and talked with me for a bit. He explained that if I would like, they would like to further evaluate Cooper. He said that the current dose of med that Cooper is on is a "whopper" of a dose for such a small child. I told him that I thought the med was making his chewing worse and he agreed even though my pedi said that could not happen. He immediatly reccomended lowering his dose and watching to see if the chewing calmed down a bit. He also gave us a booster med for the afternoon ONLY if I felt it was necessary. I told him my concerns about Cooper;s AS dx and whether or not it was valid. He said after their brief encounter with Cooper today they too are questioning whether he has it or not. I cried! They think that Cooper has some issues that are definatly triggering the chewing and some behavior...but was not happy that he was on such a strong dose of med and knowing of the other meds that had been given that I/we chose to stop taking.

There is so much more I could write. I feel a calmness about the situation. I feel that after the past 1.5+ years of searching for answers....we may finally get some help for my boy. The head Doc's final words to me were that he wanted to find appropriate treatment whether it be meds or therapy or a combo of both with the least amount of toxicity to his little body. This is music to my ears. To top my day off, Cooper out of the blue tells me tonight that I am the bestest mommy in the whole wide world!

Thank you ALL so very much for all the support I always recieve here! It truely means the world to me as I have not even told some of my oldest friends of my struggles with Cooper.

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Re: **UPDATED**Need Some *Put Your Big Girl Panties On And Dont Cry* Dust

  • Sending you lots of dust! I am a crier also...I just get emotional and out come the tears! I wish  I could control it, so I totally get where you're coming from. You are doing a good thing for your son, big hugs to you mama!
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  • Sending lots of dust!!!  I hope you get some answers and they can help you!!  
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  • I hope you get some answers, your such a strong Mommy for your little guy, I will be thinking of you today.
  • Sending you hugs and dust. You are so strong for doing this, I too would be an emotional mess. I will be thinking good thoughts for you today!.
  • Lots of dust!

    Since you know it's going to be a hard time for you I would take the time to write down all of your important questions, all of the behavioral history points you think are important ( time lines, triggers, what helps, what makes things worse), behavioral strategies you've tried ( on your own, suggested by Docs, school district) anything you've come to on your own that you want to try, medication history ( dosages, start/end times, positive and negative reactions).

    His pedi gave him the AS diagnosis, correct?  If so I would definitely ask for her to re-evaluate that, IMO a regular pedi is not competent to make that DX.  

    She may not go over every point with you (although you do have a lot of time so maybe) but odds are she will review everything later so it will be worth your time.  Also being organized will help you focus and give you something to fall back upon if you lose it, worst case you can always just hand her the paperSmile  You can do it Mama.

  • jsugrin gave you some great advice. I'm a crier too, but I know to be as organized as I can when something emotional is about to happen, b/c even if I do break down I have my list to go back to.

    Lots of dust and huge hugs to you. I hope that this gets you guys going in the right direction.

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  • Good luck.  I'm with J -- a list/memo always works well for me.  I try to start at the present and then fill in gaps with explanation (ie, this is worrying me today, but it seemed to start X months ago and get worse). 
  • Good luck!  They gave you great advice above... as another crier, I can understand your nervousness about losing it during the appointment.  Just keep in mind that you're a great Mama who's doing the right thing for your child by getting this second opinion!  I hope you're able to come away from it with something to ease your mind, whatever that may be.


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  • Huge hugs. Sending you lots of dust to get through it and remember a LOT of parents cry in those offices, so you aren't alone if you do.
  • Hugs and dust to you.  We're heading for a re-eval ourselves. 
  • Hugs. I am not a crier but I do when it comes to my kids. HUGS and great doc helps you out dust
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  • Good luck. I hope the appointment goes well and that you get some answers... And if you have to cry, then cry, breathe deep, and try again. Sometimes that works for me...
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  • Sending you lots of dust and hugs!  I hope this doc can help!
  • Hope all went well at the appointment. 

     

  • I am so happy for you! This is wonderful! I wish you still dust that you get all the answers you need and that everything goes as smoothly as possile.  this is great news.
  • Your update makes my heart happy.
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  • I don't see why your pedi was trying to manage this by herself. It seems like she should have referred C to a psychiatrist a long time ago. Good for you, you are a great mommy and I hope you find a treatment regimen that works for you guys soon! 
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  • What a fabulous update.  You are a great mommy.  I see nothing but great things in his/your future.  It sounds like this new Dr. is really on your team. 
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