When did the "mommy urge" hit you?

WishUponAstar89 · November 2011

Hi all!

I'm a lurker, mainly because I'm trying to prevent pregnancy/not pregnant (lol) but I have a question for you lovely ladies anyways:

When did your urge to become a mother start really kicking in?

I have always known I want to be a mommy, and I got my degree in biology and love studying the biological aspects of conception/development, but lately I find myself constantly reading the bump and other forums just because I am SO excited to one day be pregnant. I am 22 and not even set to get married until summer of 2013, though.

Did any of you start reaaalllyy wanting kids too early? Did you embrace it and let yourself think about it or did you push it away and let something else in your life consume your thoughts? I'm hoping wedding planning next year will help me through, but until then, I can't get babies off the brain!!

Thanks in advance for your input, and congrats and good luck in your 1st tri!!!

AugustSkye · November 2011

Lol, I'm lurking on this board too...

I am a FTM, only 19, and we were not TTC. I feel like a totally different person than I was seven months ago. I've found that I'm not enjoying my subscription to Cosmopolitan too much anymore and I would much rather be curled up on the couch watching TLC with the latest issue of All You, LOL. I am a HW, and I spend pretty much all of my time looking up ways to make our household more frugal. It's very rewarding!

So I don't suppose this is about the urge to become a mommy, it's just how becoming a mommy has changed me (for the better, if I might say so myself.)

MidwestIrishBridea · November 2011

I think my mommy urge hit me the day I was given my first babydoll. Haha!

And I'm kind of not kidding. Seriously, I've always wanted to be a mother. More than anything else. Even as a young teenager, I've always said I'd sacrifice pretty much any dream for the chance to be a mother because that was my ultimate dream.

The urge became even stronger towards the end of college, at around age 20 when my friends who were my age or just slightly older started having babies of their own. And I went crazy for a baby at age 22-23. I'm almost POSITIVE my conception date is my 24th birthday and I could not be more thrilled.

There is no right or wrong time to have a baby, IMO. People worry about stable careers, having big savings accounts, "experiencing life," first, but...... there could always be more money, there could always be more stability. If everyone waited till they felt perfectly ready to do something major in life, there'd be no marriages, no home ownerships, and no new children. I ended up intentionally getting pregnant while engaged because you know what? I wanted a child and I knew who I wanted that child with. So we went and "did it." Literally. And we're so excited to meet the greatest life experience we'll ever have -- our babe.

EmmaRJ · November 2011

Heeeeyy, similar story here. I majored in anatomy/physiology/biology and I always loved studying the ins and outs of conception, reproductive endocrinology, etc. Baby fever really hit me when I was 21, I'd say. And got really out of control when I met my boyfriend. Our wedding will be in autumn 2012 buuuttt... yeah, I'm almost 7 weeks along now. Oh, and I'm 23.

As for the baby fever, I think I pretty much dealt with it the same way you are. I was always lurking here, TTGP, and stay-at-home-moms (my dream job). I spent a lot of my free time reading homemaking blogs, researching how to save money and different parenting techniques, etc. Oh yeah, I also started charting my BBT at fertilityfriend.com "in preparation for TTC." We see how THAT turned out. Of course, BF's baby fever was only slightly less obsessive than mine.

allisonmarie22 · November 2011

I swore I never wanted kids until I hit 30 and found the right man to be their father. Then it all changed.

tcu_2003 · November 2011

I've always wanted kids, but I'll be honest and say, I really could have waited another year or two before getting pregnant. I'm 30, and have been married just over a year. DH is 5 years older than me, and definitely has baby fever (he complains that he'll be so old when he has a kid) - so we compromised and agreed we'd start trying to conceive after we'd been married for a year.

I didn't ever worry about when it would happen, I just trusted that eventually would. It probaby helped that my mom didn't get married until she was 28, and had me at 29, so I didn't feel that I was behind some imaginary schedule or something. And, as a pp mentioned, life happened - I focused on my career, traveling, friends, etc.

Natalie&Mark · November 2011

Pssshh, I'm not sure I'm ready for it, even in the midst of pregnancy. haha.

DawnLilly · November 2011

i never wanted to be a mother growing up. had stuffed animals, no dolls. i never wanted to get married and never wanted children. i was very independent and didnt want to lose that. then i met dh. we moved in together after a month, were engaged at 8 months and married on our two year anniversary. did i mention i'm only 22? i finished school early and where i wanted to be. even after we were married dh wanted kids right away and i said 6 years minimum. then in april we thought we were pregnant and after weeks of testing found out i wasnt. i was much more depressed and sad than i expected so we waited a few months to make sure it was still the right decision for us and that it wasnt just hormones and then began trying. don't ever let anyone tell you age has anything to do with it. just make sure it is the right choice for both you and your partner.

NayNaysPlayPen · November 2011

I got the urge around 19. I dated my then-boyfriend from age 17 to 22 so I of course thought he was "the one" (hahahahahaha what was I thinking). I really wanted to be a mommy, but was no where near ready. When I met my now-husband at 23, I knew he'd eventually be my children's father.

The urge to ACTUALLY get pregnant started coming just before our wedding in August '10. In June of this year he said OK im ready lets have a baby! We were pregnant by July! Im Soooo ready for this

mkflower3000 · November 2011

I've always really wanted to have kids and dreamt about it for a long time, but the urge didn't become really bad until I was 20 (so also pretty early, I guess). Somehow I managed to hold myself off for 4 years... I was a lot like you, though - thought about it all the time, watched baby shows, relied on my impending wedding to keep the thoughts away. Nothing really worked, and it didn't help that DH's family kept having babies left and right (not to mention a ton of my friends)! It was an awful tease. I'm almost surprised that I lasted this long! Partly it was because the few times we almost followed through with it I got scared because I felt like it wasn't the right time (I'd start thinking about $, some plans that we had, etc).

We finally got married in September and became pregnant about 4 days later. I sometimes still worry that the time isn't totally right, but it's definitely more right than it was before the wedding! (not because I'm a strict believer of marriage first, but simply because of when the wedding happened in our lives)

Good luck holding back - I know how hard, frustrating, and upsetting it can be at times! It'll be worth it when you can truly provide for LO and yourself, though!

drbethc · November 2011

I've always wanted kids, but the urge didn't really hit until my biological clock started to tick. My dh and I have been married for 9 years and this will be our first child. We both wanted to finish all of our goals and wait until we started a family. My DH and I are both working professionals with professional degrees and wanted to be well established in our careers before we started a family. My clock started to tick and here we are!

ItsSupaFly2U · November 2011

When I turned 25. My clock started ticking, but unfortunatly my guy at the time wasnt stable and smoked weed/drank ALOT so we never got pregnant. But my man now, I've known him 14 years and it was just meant to be. I'm 28 now, just at the perfect time. Big Smile

Capt Jen · November 2011

Up until February of this year, I NEVER wanted kids or even considered it. I had no "mommy urge", and I was perfectly happy living a child-free life with DH. DH started getting the urge late last year when his sister got pregnant, and told me that he would like to have a family, but he understood my feelings on the matter.

Since this was something that he really wanted, and after many long and tearful discussions on the matter of whether he wanted a kid more than he wanted to be married to me, I began to seriously consider motherhood and my feelings/fears towards it.

After many months of thinking and self-reflection, I decided that my fear of motherhood was no longer enough to prevent us from starting a family. So, for DH's 30th birthday in April, I gave him a onesie and told him that I would have a baby with him. He said it was the BEST gift he has ever received. The original plan was to wait until after my 30th birthday in December, but after a few months, we decided we were ready and started trying in August. We found out a month and a half later that we were going to have a baby, and I couldn't be happier! I honestly never thought I would be so happy to be pregnant.

It's been a long journey, but after 8 years of marriage, we're finally starting our family.

lunurse2007 · November 2011

I had my first son at 24 and everyone I worked with thought I was CRAZY for starting a family so young but we were so excited and I wouldn't change it for the world! Now we're expecting again and they still think we're crazy for having more kids and being young but I just love love love being a Mommy, it's the best thing in the world

)

ktbabyblu26 · November 2011

The mommy urge hit me this summer actually. I'm 24 years old and got married in August 2010. I had just started a new job and everyone was around my age and pregnant! Well not everyone, but a lot of the girls at work were. So now I can't stop reading the boards on the bump and looking at everything and anything baby.

My husband wants to wait a year or two to save a little more money. Its going to be hard, I can't wait to start a family!

WishUponAstar89 · November 2011

Thank you all for your stories! It's nice to see that many of you felt the same as I do now. It's especially nice to hear from you girls in your early 20's, because my friends are at a totally different level than me right now (most still dating around, looking for jobs, and FAR from thinking about kids.) And for those that said that there's never a "perfect time", I completely agree. I'm sure in a few years I'll be "more ready" but I'll never be 100 percent prepared for a baby. But one thing's for sure...I'll be damn excited!!!

Best of luck again to all of you!

HotChocolate79 · November 2011

It wasn't even remotely on my radar until my mid 20's. I knew I wanted to have kids "someday" but had no idea when that some day would arrive and my life wasn't exactly conducive to mommyhood. I was married (to my exH) and we knew getting pregnant was a possibility, we were fine with it if it happened but it wasn't anything we actually wanted and tried for until I was 26/27. We ran into TTTC at that point, and split up shortly thereafter. I have no regrets but the 18 months of hardcore TTC was the last nail in the coffin of that relationship. I met my bf (who is now MH) six months after my divorce became final, and we were talking about kids very soon after. I am almost 33 now and we'll have our first in May. So it was a rather long road...

Kenneylynn3 · November 2011

I've always wanted to be a mom since I was three. I think the urge hit me though at 15. I know that's young, but I've known basically my entire life that that's what I wanted. Finally in my last year of college, and I'll be a mom this summer.