TTC After a Loss

Anyone else play the "this week I would've been X weeks pregnant" game?

Why do I do this to myself?

I'm generally pretty good at leaving this in the past and looking optimistically to the future. But I have several good friends and cousins who are pregnant now or gave birth recently. Sometimes seeing them or reading their posts and seeing pics on Facebook just brings it all back. 

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Re: Anyone else play the "this week I would've been X weeks pregnant" game?

  • I have this "baby bump" app on the my iphone, that every week would give me a picture on what the baby would look like at x weeks. Even though I deleted my EDD, you can manually scroll through and look at the pictures.....I know I shouldn't, but I find myself looking at it weekly and thinking the same thing.

    I keep trying to tell myself that I will get to use that app again, and not cry every time I do!

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  • Yes!  This week I would have been 31 weeks or 9 weeks depending on which loss I am thinking of. 
  • Glad I'm not the only masochistic one out there.

    Wink

    Edited to add....HUGS to all of us.  

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  • I do this every Wednesday to myself. Wednesday was my week change and it is the hardest day of the week. I actually dread it. This past week was the hardest because I would have been 20 weeks and we would have found out what we were having. I hope it ends soon. It's so hard to know that I should have a little baby inside me kicking around. ((HUGS)) Big hugs to you!!
  • Yes, I do it a lot! Except now I should have a 1 week old. :-(
    ~Jess & Mike May 12, 2007
    12.6.07 CP at 5w
    5.21.08 BO discovered at 7w, D&E at 8w3d
    8.31.08 CP at 4w5d
    BFP Sept 25, 2008 bfp buddy lkstor Landon born June 6, 2009
    3.25.11 missed m/c discovered at 9w6d, D&E at 10w2d
    4.28.11 MTHFR a1298c homozygous discovered
    4.2011 Began NaProTechnology
    10.12.11 Diagnosed with Type III Luteal Phase Defect
    10.2011 Starting hcg injections on 5, 7 & 9 dpo
    BFP 12.7.11 - EDD 8.14.12 - IT'S A BOY! Fruit Baby
    Life During and After RPL
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  • Yes, I do it all the time, with both losses. Sad It sucks!

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    TTC #1 since 3/11


    BFP #1 5/4/11 EDD 1/12/12 natural m/c 5/17/11


    BFP #2 8/9/11 EDD 4/18/12 ectopic pregnancy (methotrexate) 8/24/11 ruptured tube and removal 8/29/11


    BFP #3 3/9/12 EDD 11/19/12 Logan born 11/18/12

    BFP #4 10/21/14 EDD 6/30/15


    ~*~*Everyone Welcome*~*~
  • I don't know the exact week, but we would have told our families on Thanksgiving with a "what I'm thankful for..." kind do intro.  When that day rolls around I know it will hit hard.  My illness is occasionally checking out the May mommies board, even though it always makes me sad, mad and resentful.  For some reason I can't help myself.
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    BFP#1 - 09/12/11, EDD 5/18/12 - Stopped growing at 6w3d, m/c induced 10/14/11
    BFP#2 - 04/01/12, EDD 12/12/12, Arrived 12/4/12!!
    BFP#3 - 12/31/13, EDD 09/10/14 - Grow baby, grow!

  • Yep.  Tomorrow we were going to "come out" on Halloween to everyone.  I have the cute skeleton baby t-shirt hanging in my closet.  Instead...I'm miscarrying right now.  It sucks.
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    two years!
    after two losses, now happily expecting baby #1 09.16.12
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  • Nope. I am one of those people that prefers to be in denial or not think about things (healthy I know). I saw someone's ticker in their siggy the other day and realized I was due right around the same time and when I saw I'd be well into 2nd tri I was really depressed. Now I play the other game...if I got pregnant this cycle my EDD would be, etc. Traded one evil for another I guess.
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      image

  • I do it too, why do we do this to ourselves??  Tuesday was my day to get updates and be one week further along.  I had a major breakdown.  I hope I soon forget what week I'm on so I stop putting myself through it.  :(
  • ::raises hand:: Big time. And today for halloween I wanted one of those cute baby skeleton shirts. ugh. it sucks. ((Hugs)) to my fellow week counters.
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  • imagemandac033:
    I do this every Wednesday to myself. Wednesday was my week change and it is the hardest day of the week. I actually dread it. This past week was the hardest because I would have been 20 weeks and we would have found out what we were having. I hope it ends soon. It's so hard to know that I should have a little baby inside me kicking around. ((HUGS)) Big hugs to you!!

    This exactly! Wednesdays are hard.  I also think about how far I would be and how I would be finding out the sex of my baby. Hugs to everyone.

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    BFP #1 6.19.11 ~ EDD 2.23.12 ~ CP on 6.22.11
    BFP #2 7.23.11 ~ EDD 3.28.12 ~ MC on 8.16.11
    BFP #3 11.17.11~ EDD 7.31.12 ~ MC on 1.18.12
    BFP #4 4.12.12 ~ EDD 12.25.12~ Born on 12.26.12
  • Me I know it can't be healthy but I would have been 15 weeks :( Makes me so aggravated but hoping my time will come soon! ALL of our times will come, that is what gets me through every day.
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  • Yeah I have been constantly thinking that I should have a 7 month old that I should be dressing up for halloween tomorrow.. Sad
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  • Yeah - it's especially hard w/ all the holidays coming up.  Baby's first halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas, etc.  *Sigh*

    PGAL/PAL welcome
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    Trying to start our family since 2010
    BFP #1 11.4.10, EDD 7.12.11, HB 12/9/10, MMC 12/27/10; 11w6d
    BFP #2 9.12.12, EDD 5.24.13, Baby Boy Born 5.15.13!!
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    "Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." ~Gandhi
  • Big (((hugs))) to us all. 
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  • I do this occasionally. I think I did it more right after the loss, more like this is when we would have told our families, had our first appointment, etc. Now I really only do it when I see this one girl on Facebook posting about her pregnancy and that is because she was 10 days ahead of me. She doesn't post too often about things, but last week was a killer week because she had her a/s so there was the lead up, the announcement of the gender then a separate announcement of a name.
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    TTC#1 starting Feb 2011, BFP #1:5/31/11, CP: 6/6/11; BFP #2: 7/9/11, loss confirmed 8/3 with D&C on 8/12 finding complete molar pregnancy. Forced break until Feb 2012. My blog image
  • Ugh yes. And now I have TWO miscarried pregnancies to play that game with... boo. I'd be about 30 weeks with my first. Wow.. what a bummer.
    BFP #1 4/23/11, EDD 1/4/12::No heartbeat @ 9 wks::D&C 6/1/11 
    Child #1  June 2012
    Child #2  Feb 2014
    Child #3  Feb 16
    BFP 3/9/17
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  • ((hugs)) This is one of the hardest things for me, and, unfortunately, it never ends. It will morph in to I should have a baby this old, then my child should be this old, etc. It doesn't go away, but it does get easier with time.
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    Mama to 5 angel babies, 1 rainbow baby, and 2 more angel babies. 
    My beautiful Ella/ToT arrived 10/10/12. 
  • imagemandac033:
    I do this every Wednesday to myself. Wednesday was my week change and it is the hardest day of the week. I actually dread it. This past week was the hardest because I would have been 20 weeks and we would have found out what we were having. I hope it ends soon. It's so hard to know that I should have a little baby inside me kicking around. ((HUGS)) Big hugs to you!!

    This was me 2 weeks ago :(  I try not to think about it but the "would be milestones" still suck! ((Hugs))

    Married since 06/2004, TTC since 01/2011

    BFP #1 and M/C 5/2011

    BFP #2 7/1/2011, Blighted ovums officially diagnosed at 9w6d, D&C 8/19/2011.

    BFP #3 12/7/2011, EDD 8/15/2012, Harper Lorelai born 8/09/12

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  • Yes, I do the same thing.  I m/c last Sunday at 6 weeks, and today I would have been 7 weeks.  I couldn't help but think today that my ticker should have said "sweet pea" :(


    Carter Douglas 09.25.12
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  • Hugs to all of you.  I don't know exactly how many weeks, but I know I would be 2 weeks behind one of my good friends who is visibly showing now.  She's around 25ish weeks I guess.

    Tomorrow is my 3 year wedding anniversary.  Instead of a guest book, we had our wedding guests sign 5 bottles of wine for us to celebrate our first five anniversaries.  We opened this year's tonight...my SIL wrote "Are you pregnant yet? xoxo" on the bottle...needless to say I was bummed out when I saw it.  Obviously she had no idea 3 years ago that we would be in this situation, and she would feel absolutely horrible if I told her about it (I'm sure she was tipsy when she wrote it and has no recollection haha).   Maybe next year??? 

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  • Yep.  I did it a lot in the weeks after the m/c.  It faded after awhile.  I had a major breakdown one day when I realized I didn't know how far along I was supposed to be or exactly how long it had been since the m/c. Made me feel like I was being a horrible mom to my angel baby.  Then that passed too.  Right up until my EDD was coming up.  I thought about it constantly in those few weeks.  Now all I can think about is how I should have a 3 week old.  :*(
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  • I do...

     

    Kind of driving myself crazy because I really wanted to be pregnant by my due date.... only this cycle and next cycle left to make that happen :( 

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  • I do it too. Every Wednesday, without fail, I say I was supposed to be # weeks. I should be out to here, I should have been feeling the baby move, soon I would have been finding out the sex, blah blah blah.

    I also play the ovulation calculator all the time on Baby Center to see when my possible EDD would be if I were to get pregnant this cycle.

    I also "predict" when we would be telling people. Like, oh maybe New Year's...oh, maybe Valentine's. Whatever.

     

    DS born 2009
    BFP#2 ~ 8/2/11, EDD 4/11/12, D&C 9/12/11 at 9w5d
    BFP#3 ~ 4/15/12, EDD 12/21/12 ~ DD born 12/22/12
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  • I do this all of the time :( I would have been almost 28 weeks pregnant this week. I really wish I would stop but I can't.
  • Yup, that is exactly why Sunday's are the worst. Every Sunday I will tell DH and/or my mom that I would be x weeks today. Yesterday I reminded them that I would have been 11 weeks and that I'm coming close to the time that I would be coming out to everyone. I was so excited that I would be coming out to friends and the rest of the family slightly before Thanksgiving. And that would have been just enough time for them to possibly shop for some baby gifts for Christmas.
    imageimageimage
    BFP #1 ~ EDD 5.20.2012 ~ MC 10.1.2011
    BFP #2 ~ EDD 11.15.2012 ~ CP 3.7.2012
    BFP #3 ~ DS born 12.03.2012

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  • I do it every week.  It sucks.  This week would have been my first appt too. :(
    ________________________________________________________________


    Carter Robert 7.18.08 | Brynn Sophia 5.24.10 | Reid Joseph 9.10.12 | Emerson Mae 1.27.14

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  • Not intentionally but I get a weekly email letting me know how far along I should be.  13 weeks...*sigh*.  I have unsubscribed a ton of times and they won't stop.
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    CRAFTY ME

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  • I do think about it every once in awhile.  Especially today since I have my HSG scheduled for tomorrow, I keep thinking it should be an OB appt. to check on our baby. 
    TTC since July 2010 BFP#1~5/8/11~~EDD 1/18/12~Natural M/C Confirmed 6/1/11 BFP#2~12/2/11 ~EDD 8/13/12~It's a girl!~Emma Grace born 8/12/12 Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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