question for those who have been TTCAL

aadewitt · October 2011

the 1st month or so that you were TTC again, did you have high hopes? or were you more realistic that it might not be this 1st time around? I keep trying to tell myself that it most likely wouldn't happen this cycle, yet I seem to find myself going to back to "if I get PG this cycle then..." I am really trying hard to keep in mind that it might not happen for a while. I just don't want to get upset if AF shows her face next month!

kevinandmonica2011 · October 2011

The "being realistic" and "getting my hopes up" are both part of the total mind fvck that IS TTCAL.

I think everyone will tell you that, although they may have been realistic that it may not happen on cycle one (or two or five or twelve)... they would be lying if they didn't play the "if I get pregnant this cycle" game.... even if they knew it was just wishful thinking or daydreaming. I have done it every cycle since I started.

Whether you are hopeful or not, seeing AF is still a disappointment. Even when you are certain she is coming... it still stings. Then the next cycle... "I'm not going to get my hopes up this month"... but still, a teeny tiny piece of us remains hopeful every.single.cycle. regardless.

FX for you that your stay here is short and sweet.

VikingQueen · October 2011

I wasn't hopeful.. but that was probably more of the fact that we had already been trying for almost 2 years at that point, and it was kinda a "surprise" pregnancy (I wasn't suppose to be able to get pregnant without fertility meds and we hadn't started taking them yet) But I have seen quite a few ladies get pregnant within a few months of their loss on here. so GL!!

buckeyebaby814 · October 2011

I was unrealistic at first, yes.

carcrashheart · October 2011

After the first loss I was completely unrealistic and hopeful. After the second loss I was far more aware of how long it could take, since it had taken 10 cycles to get #2. I will probably be the same way once we are officially back to TTC this time around.

tanya8 · October 2011

I get my hopes up every cycle...but then realism hits me in the form of AF...its a vicous cycle, because for most people TTC (AL or not), there is always going to be that little part of you to get their hopes up, which is even further exacerbated by the fact that you actually know when you are O and are having nookie more regularly than the "oops" couples...

nykkybaby · October 2011

I am hopeful if I get pregnant within a year. I feel so jealous of those ladies who actually ovulate every month, especially those who have semi regular O dates. So, am I surprised that its been 5 months, no. Disappointed? Yes. But this has been my MO since 3/08. So Im used to the disappointment and thankful for my DH. And for all the ladies on this board. I know I'm not on here much, and when I am I'm usually in my darkest hours... =(

gilmoregirl105 · October 2011

I tried to be realistic, but I really was kinda hopeful that I would get pregnant within a few months of TTCAL.

mijakach · October 2011

Honestly, I do feel like it will happen quickly...but I'm also expecting it to end in m/c again. I really can't get it out of my head that it's always going to end that way.

SouthernBellaKS · October 2011

I was one of those who kind of expected to get PG the first time we tried because that's what happened when I got PG the first time. We started "not avoiding" and were PG the first time, and then m/c. When our first few months came and went, I started to get a bit panicky but then I let reality set in.

keft514 · October 2011

It took us about 14 months to get PG the first time. After finding out on Wednesday that we lost that baby, I am guarded about the next time. I will most definitely be getting my hopes up, BUT will probably feel a bit different when we do get a BFP again.

MeatballEsq · October 2011

keft514:
It took us about 14 months to get PG the first time. After finding out on Wednesday that we lost that baby, I am guarded about the next time. I will most definitely be getting my hopes up, BUT will probably feel a bit different when we do get a BFP again.

I am so sorry for your loss.

niknak1128 · October 2011

Yeah I think we all pretty much play that game. I have a super hard time not being hopeful because I miscarried at about 5 weeks before my son and I was literally sitting at work at like 1pm in the afternoon.. thinking holy s**t.. I'm totally ovulating right now and I left work at 1pm so go home and have sex. I had to! I had a closing on a refinance that afternoon at 3pm and I was flying out the very next day at 7am to go on a cruise with my mom. We literally had one shot at trying and it worked. That's how we got DS so this time around I'm trying to tell myself that I probably just got lucky.. because I probably did just get lucky.. but on the other hand I know first hand that it can happen because it did and now that's all I think about.

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