halloween going out -WWYD

KellyC703 · October 2011

So we're all about the same way through our pregnancies here. I need your opinion ladies. My husband wants to go out bar hopping tonight downtown. I told him I don't feel comfortable going b/c I don't see a bar crowded with drunk people as the place for a person who is 6 months pregnant. But I also told him he could still go. He told me I was being "prudish" and acting like I had something to prove. Needless to say this not bode well with me and it started an argument. He is 33 years old, I just don't see how missing out on one year of bar hopping on halloween is a big deal. We are going to a house party first anyway. I need to know if I am out of line here, or is he?

preggersINschool25 · October 2011

I guess it depends on how often he goes out and what kind of bars you are going to. My husband works 6 days a week and if he wants to go out and do something, I try to do it for him because he doesn't get much free time.

If he wanted to go to a bar where there are no seats and you have to stand, I just wouldn't go because it's too uncomfortable to be on my feet that long.

I don't think you are being unreasonable, but if you want to compromise you could offer to go with him until a certain time.

SY Smiles · October 2011

IMO, he should be a little more considerate of your feelings. It isn't like he is going to be missing out on a whole lot, especially if you're going to a house party first. I wouldn't want to go out bar hopping at this point at all! I don't think it has anything to do with being "prudish", it has to do with the fact that you are 6 months pregnant and there is no reason why you should be drug from drunk party to drunk party if you don't want to be.

ghdst1 · October 2011

It's probably going to be different for everyone. Would I want to go bar hopping at 24 weeks pregnant? Probably not but if we both dressed up and were going out I wouldn't mind doing that for a few hours and letting DH get some drinks along the way.

We are going to a friend's party tonight and it doesn't start till 9. I am going to be dead tired and the only person not drinking. I still am going because it will be fun to dress up and be with friends.

christinak22 · October 2011

Can't he go with friends? Does he just want you there as a DD (my husband has loved having a built-in DD while I'm pregnant...ha!)? I wouldn't want to go, either--bar hopping is absolutely no fun when you're pregnant.

Shawnee11507 · October 2011

I wouldn't want to go either. I don't have a job where I stand all day, so I'd be tired already after the friends' party.

Here, our "downtown" has a big party tonight for Halloween. I went last year and there was barely room to walk down the street. It is like being in a mosh pit- 1000s of people on one street. Heck no would I go- drunk people would be banging into my belly left and right. I would also consider whether bars allow smoking in your area- that would also make it a no for me.

If you gave him permission to go without you he should go or keep his mouth shut!

Hunterloren · October 2011

Oh, my DH and I had a three day argument about him taking me to a bar a few weekends ago. I was picking him up from a party and I thought we were going home. But instead we were going to meet everyone at a smokey nasty bar at 1230. I was exhausted, sick, and seriously pissed. That argument really hasn't ended.

MollySm · October 2011

I was going to say that I would probably suck it up and go for him, until you got to the part about him calling you prudish! After that I would probably be pissed off and not go

We are going to 2 Halloween parties this year, (one last night and one tonight), and I really have no desire to go. I'm the only pregnant one, the only tired one, the only non-drunk one, etc. It's just not fun. On top of that I don't feel great in a Halloween costume, while all the other girls look fabulous.

But my H has been a real trooper through the pregnancy. He almost never does any fun going out things anymore because I just want to go to sleep. On top of that I've been so hormonal this week (crying pretty much every day), and he's dealt with it all really well. So I am just trying to suck it up. That being said, I let him know that I wouldn't be able to stay up as late as everyone else, and he was just going to have to deal.

Last night went alright. I didn't have a great time, but he did. He did drink a bit, and so wasn't as receptive to leaving as I would have liked (once I said it, it took us like an hour to get out the door), but he left much earlier than he would have liked, so I felt like it was ok. We'll see how tonight goes.... Either way, it's just one weekend and then back to early bedtimes, not crazy drinking, life for us.

Sorry - I just totally took over your post! That was long! Guess I've been thinking about it a lot this week!!

sparks2987 · October 2011

DH was invited to go out last weekend too, he said he wouldnt go without me, and I live in a small town, and well people talk, so it is better for us not to go out while I am 6 months pregnant.

If i was you I would worry if him not going bar hopping is going to be a problem once LO arrives. I have made it clear to DH I will not be that mom that gets stuck at home taking care of baby while he goes out, if we dont have a sitter, neither one of us go out.

bethanyturon · October 2011

It seems to me like he is being selfish. What are you going to do that's entertaining while everyone else is drinking? He should be working on adapting to the new lifestyle you all will be having soon.

jewerner · October 2011

I dont think id really mind, as long as it werent a smoky bar. its not like youd be drinking and Id feel better knowing theres obviously a very capable driver (me!). But then again we dont go out very often so itd be like a special case Holiday thing. If this were a common occurance, Id be annoyed. Youre pregnant and sleepy. idk, depends on you guys, thought the prudish comment on a NORMAL day would start a huge fight, much less with hormones mixed in. I'm with you there!

jewerner · October 2011

Shawnee11507:
I wouldn't want to go either. I don't have a job where I stand all day, so I'd be tired already after the friends' party.
Here, our "downtown" has a big party tonight for Halloween. I went last year and there was barely room to walk down the street. It is like being in a mosh pit- 1000s of people on one street. Heck no would I go- drunk people would be banging into my belly left and right. I would also consider whether bars allow smoking in your area- that would also make it a no for me.
If you gave him permission to go without you he should go or keep his mouth shut!

Do you live near Tampa? Guavaween??

KellyC703 · October 2011

Thanks ladies! You all made me feel a bit better about not wanting to go get bumped about the bars all night. Turns out we didn't end up doing anything Saturday night. DH was a little hung over from being out til 2 on Friday night with his buddy, and after dinner on Saturday I started getting really bad stomach cramping. Bad to point that I pulled out my pregnancy books and looked up the symptoms for pre-term labor again. So we just stayed in and watched scary movies.

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