Do you ever...

lilylow · October 2011

Do you ever find yourself validating your c-section to people?

Whenever anyone asks me about my labor/delivery and I tell them I had a scheduled c-section I always follow it up with, "it was medically necessary and the only option for my baby". Anyone else feel the same need?

Sept1799 · October 2011

I do that to. Normally people don't ask but I get that look.

Hey, its all about a healthy baby and mom, right?

magdalina.h · October 2011

Nope

J9melissa · October 2011

I've never been asked how I had him. So Nope.

disbride061103 · October 2011

Yes, I do it all the time. I explain that my older son was breech and that my second section was after a failed VBAC attempt. It's totally my issue. I've only ever had two people judge my c/s, one was my mom who doesn't believe that i gave birth and the other was a nestie/blogger who faulted me for being induced and trusting my doctors for my VBAC attempt.

momamatthews · October 2011

Sadly enough, I only felt the need to do this to my IL's. My SIL had a home birth and believes EVERYONE should have a home birth. When my daughter was born at 31wks due to severe preeclampsia I got the stink eye multiple times. Kind of sad IMO. I guess I wasn't even justifying it as much as I have to remind her/them that not everyone is lucky enough to have a perfect pregnancy.

MeggieLou2 · October 2011

BlinkMe182 - I love the name Josie! Big Smile

As for the question...I don't really feel the need to defend my reasons for having a c-section but in a few instances I've gotten, "the look," as well and have given them a shortened version of the details. I was induced on a Friday because baby wasn't growing inside me, was still in labor on Sunday so they took him c-section. End of story. People are so judgmental...I'm with PP...healthy baby and healthy mama, period.

mrsw23 · October 2011

I have in the past. I usually explain the whole story and their jaw drops and they forget all about the evil "c-section" word and say things like "Thank goodness she's alright!" because I was never in labor and DD's life was in danger.

But... I was talking about this to my MIL over the weekend and she said no one has the right to judge anyone else's birth choices/experiences. I don't pick at women who have had epidurals. Bottom line is, after talking to her I realized that it's what I want and what's safest for myself and baby that matters. Well, probably not in that order ; )

LadyXaverian · October 2011

Yes, I do this, too.

cottonlily84 · October 2011

Yeah I sure do. And I don't realize it until afterwards. I think it's because I was the biggest supporter of natural childbirthing there was and totally against the thousands of unnecessary c/s women are frightened into every year. (necessary c/s are one thing, when they're just for the benefit of the dr it irks me) So when I tell people I had a c/s I just have this subconscious need to follow it with "because I had a cercalge and my baby was a footling breech and my water broke 8 weeks early". I know my baby had to be born my c/s, I wasn't pressured to do it and both me and baby were healthy and safe because the c/s was available. But I still can't help but feel like a failure that the c/s was necessary to begin with so I have to give that explanation.

I have to add though that I've never gotten "the look". For one c/s are so common now no one really bats an eye that I had one. I just personally have the thing about explaining why. It's my issue. And when people do find out I had one they're always concerned, not judgmental. I guess I'm lucky for that at least.

ladybugpjb · October 2011

I used to, but it doesn't usually come up anymore. If I do, it's more to reassure myself. I try to remind myself that 100 years ago, DS and/or I very well could have died. C-section was the best option.

I've never gotten "the look" from anyone, including my friend who is a Bradley instructor and volunteered to be my doula (but we didn't take her up on that offer). I'm sure it will happen eventually, though.

laurasuzanne2006 · October 2011

momamatthews:
Sadly enough, I only felt the need to do this to my IL's. My SIL had a home birth and believes EVERYONE should have a home birth. When my daughter was born at 31wks due to severe preeclampsia I got the stink eye multiple times. Kind of sad IMO. I guess I wasn't even justifying it as much as I have to remind her/them that not everyone is lucky enough to have a perfect pregnancy.

Well you can tell your SIL you know a woman who planned a Home Birth but ended up with severe pre-eclampsia and ended up with a C-section. Smile

Despite having planned a homebirth I totally feel comfortable that my CS was totally necessary and have no regrets. I still say i had pre-eclampsia when i talk about my c-section. At the same time I don't think people have any understanding how bad pre-eclampsia can get.

reg224 · October 2011

laurasuzanne2006:
momamatthews:
Sadly enough, I only felt the need to do this to my IL's. My SIL had a home birth and believes EVERYONE should have a home birth. When my daughter was born at 31wks due to severe preeclampsia I got the stink eye multiple times. Kind of sad IMO. I guess I wasn't even justifying it as much as I have to remind her/them that not everyone is lucky enough to have a perfect pregnancy.

Well you can tell your SIL you know a woman who planned a Home Birth but ended up with severe pre-eclampsia and ended up with a C-section.

Despite having planned a homebirth I totally feel comfortable that my CS was totally necessary and have no regrets. I still say i had pre-eclampsia when i talk about my c-section. At the same time I don't think people have any understanding how bad pre-eclampsia can get.

And add to that the girl that I know that planned her home birth. She spent 3 days in active labor which kept stalling. Then she spent 14 hours pushing. Finally, her midwife said they had to go to the hospital. As soon as they got to the hospital, she was taken for an emergency c-section. The baby was very stuck Poor girl went through so much, but it just goes to show, things dont always go as planned.