Did DH/SO stay w/ you in hosp after LO#2?

SeaSoul · October 2011

In Cal's big brother book it talks about how "the baby and Mommy come home after 2 days." When I first read it I thought, "What about Daddy??"

It had just never occurred to me that he wouldn't be with us, but we have another child to think about now! With Cal we were in the hospital for a week b/c he was on IV antibiotics (high C-Reactive Protein count), and DH was with us the whole time. Hopefully we'll be able to go home sooner this time. But, be it 2 days or 7...call me a big baby, I just can't imagine being there without DH! We do have my parents lined up to stay with Cal the 1st night but haven't thought past that. I suppose we should! I'm sure they'd take him for another night, but I'm not sure what's best for Cal...maybe DH should only stay with us 1 night?

So...what did you do with LO#1 when baby #2 arrived?

browneyedgrl4282 · October 2011

My husband stayed home over night with the twins.

OrangeSmoke · October 2011

Well, he didn't stay overnight with me for the twins, so I doubt he would stay for baby #3 (if that ever happens).

Dh actually worked the whole time I was in the hospital - I wanted it that way so he'd have more time off at home for when the boys came home.

ladychicago · October 2011

Thanks for asking....we are thinking about this now, too. Because our only family is an hour away in the suburbs with a small child of their own, and I can't imagine asking them to watch Anna for more than one night. So right now, my guess is that DH might stay with me one night (depending on how the birth goes and what time of day), but probably not the second night. He will get Anna and be with her at home. Truth be told, so long as everyone is healthy, I don't mind being in the hospital by myself if it means Anna is comfortable and well taken care of. Now, if things don't go smoothly or if there are problems, we will no doubt fly in some grandparents to stay with Anna so DH can spend more time in the hospital.

navyandviolet · October 2011

Dh stayed the first night while my mom stayed with DD at our house. The next night they traded. Dh stayed home with DD, and my mom stayed with me at the hospital. it was awsome, like a little slumber party. The nurses loved having her their and all of them wanted thier moms to stay with them when thier next babies are born. ( my mom didn't complain about the food/beds/lack of sleep like DH does) Who'd a thunk?

Mouseygail · October 2011

navy&violet:
Dh stayed the first night while my mom stayed with DD at our house. The next night they traded. Dh stayed home with DD, and my mom stayed with me at the hospital. it was awsome, like a little slumber party. The nurses loved having her their and all of them wanted thier moms to stay with them when thier next babies are born. ( my mom didn't complain about the food/beds/lack of sleep like DH does) Who'd a thunk?

what a great idea

firsttogo · October 2011

If you are a baby, I am too! My DH stayed overnight with all three. We are very fortunate to have my mom and dad and sisters and brother near to help with the sibling(s) With Gwen, DH did not stay on the (5) nights I was admitted prior to delivery, but did stay the 2.5 after she was born. I was pretty weak and sick, and had to go to the NICU every 2 hours or so and the only PP room was across the Unit so it was a bit of a walk. We liked having that time together just the three of us. He did go home more with each kid to be with the others, but from about dinnertime on, he was mine!

We pretty much put my parents in charge of the older ones, and I did not worry! They had fun, and were not traumatized by sleeping in a different house.

Mrs.Reem · October 2011

Both times I sent DH home shortly after delivery. He snores.

I'm not your typical wife though, and I felt better having daddy at home with Katen than anyone else. I got more rest knowing K was in good hands than I would have if he were with me. It also meant he was more ready to help out when we came home as he hadn't had as much bonding time.

naflmj · October 2011

I imagine I will send DH home to be with Graeme unless there are complications which I would need his support for.

howleyshell · October 2011

Our philosophy is different from most.

I won't get to sleep. I had to be monitored and was BF'ing so my sleep would be disturbed.

DH however COULD get some sleep but not if he stayed in the room with me. He's a grouch when he runs on little sleep. I need him to be strong and supportive not tired and cranky. He stayed the first night with #1 and I sent him home after that so at least one of us could get some good sleep.

With #2 I wanted #1's schedule disrupted as little as possible. He was gonna have enough change to deal with without starting it off with both his parents being gone for 2-3 days. That meant that DH was with him at home. They came to visit and my Mom would take #1 home so DH could stay longer.

Frankly I was so grateful for the time. It was peaceful and a great chance to bond with #2 before I had to go home and tackle the craziness that comes with a toddler and a new born.

I had sections both times and did fine either by myself or with the help of the nurses.

With #1 I wanted support for me because it was all new and scary. With #2 my focus was much more heavily on having as much support as possible available for #1.

Kiki11 · October 2011

When our little guy was born it was an emergency situation and we didn't even know if he was going to survive. So my husband never left the hospital. And I think even if it had been a full-term, healthy baby, he would have stayed overnight the whole time anyway. If we are ever lucky enough to have a second baby, I think I will want him to stay with me again. Our first experience was so traumatic, I want a somewhat more normal experience... the way things should have been the first time around. My little guy sees my parents frequently and he adores them. They live only 15 minutes from the hospital where I would deliver so I know they would love to keep him. Although I know that I will have to have a repeat C-section unfortunately, so that will mean 4 nights in the hospital. I'm not sure I would be comfortable with my husband and I both not being with C at night for that long. So maybe he'll stay with me for the first night or two and then go home. Love the idea of having Mom stay over after that

LVBlvd · October 2011

DH stayed with me the entire time, less a few hours he left to pick Paige up from school, take her to the park, then back to my folks house. She stayed with them for the 4 nights we were in the hospital.

I could t imagine staying alone. I needed my hubby there and he was happy to do so.

LisaMarisa · October 2011

With DD, DS came in to visit on the day we had her (although that day was kind of crazy because she had to be kept for monitoring and I was exhausted after delivery). DH stayed over and then went home for a few hours the next day to spend time with DS, shower, etc. - we didnt think he would do great being in the small hospital room for too long, one visit was enough. DH stayed over again the next night and then we came home the following day.

DS was with my parents the whole time but we were living with them at the time so it was easy.

itsmevkb · October 2011

My husband has stayed with me with all three of our children. But, we are lucky in that we have family close by who could watch our kids for multiple days and nights.

nicoleversion2 · October 2011

Ugh- I've been thinking about this too. Unfortunately, our family isn't super close (1 is an hour away and the other is about 1 1/2 hours away)- so we have 3 sets of close friends on call (whom Jake is super comfortable with and they've all watched him many times). Depending on time, etc. DH may stay the first night with me, but the plan is for him to be home with Jake at night. I hate the thought of it for me, but I feel like it's the best for Jake- to have stability/consistency and know that Daddy's home. Fortunately, he goes to bed early and the hospital is only 5 minutes from home so I'm sure putting Jake to bed and then having a friend "watch" him once he's asleep is an option too. That way DH can be with me in the evenings. Sucks

It's going to be so different this time.

KYRN · October 2011

We haven't really discussed this yet. I can't decide what I want. We've got plenty of family to keep DS so that's not an issue. I had a terrible time sleeping in the hospital and DH didn't, and it really pissed me off, the baby was sleeping and I was laying there in the dark wide awake. I didn't really need the help overnight so it wasn't all that beneficial to me to have him there.

I'll probably have him stay the first night depending on what time I deliver and what day of the week. DH will be in school when the baby is born and won't really be able to miss class like he can work, and if he's going to class he's going to need some rest.

LucyPevensie · October 2011

Mouseygail:
navy&violet:
Dh stayed the first night while my mom stayed with DD at our house. The next night they traded. Dh stayed home with DD, and my mom stayed with me at the hospital. it was awsome, like a little slumber party. The nurses loved having her their and all of them wanted thier moms to stay with them when thier next babies are born. ( my mom didn't complain about the food/beds/lack of sleep like DH does) Who'd a thunk?
what a great idea

SUCH a great idea, I love this.

LIAngel · October 2011

DH didn't even stay with me when I gave birth to Nicholas. For Ava, he would come for a few hours during the day and then he would leave to be home for Nicholas.

I'm the opposite of you and just wanted alone time in the hospital. I really didn't see any reason for DH to stay with me, especially since I sent Ava to the nursery every night as soon as everyone left (like around 8pm) and she stayed there til the next morning.

desabean · October 2011

Hmm,haven't thought about this yet but....geesh, I would have been *** out of luck without DH there after G was born. I didn't change a diaper until she was 5 days old. Garrison spends the night at my MIL's about 1-2 times a month so I don't think it would be a big deal for her to do 2-3 days after the birth but I guess we'll have to talk more about this in the upcoming months. But my hope would be for him to stay with me. I hope to be less exhausted, in pain, and just generally overwhelmed from my delivery this time around, but who knows.

hantzwedding · October 2011

I will make my DH stay with me. My parents live an hour away but we see them all the time and my DS likes hanging out with them more than he likes hanging out with us! My mom is really good about following my routine exactly. They will probably stay at our house since it is cose to the hospital and I know they will want to come visit every day, but even if they take him to their house he would be fine. DH and I went to Belize this summer for a week and DS stayed with my parents and had a blast! He is an extremely easy going kid though.

LisaBRM · October 2011

He didn't stay with me after #1, so, if we had another child, no, he wouldn't be staying with us.

schmoodle · October 2011

DH stayed with me. My mom stayed over the night before our induction and stayed with Toodle when we left at 3 am for the hospital. Then mid-day my brother and SIL came to our house and stayed with Toodle the rest of the time until I came home. I was only gone middle of the night Tuesday/Wednesday morning to Friday early afternoon.

DH went home during the day Thursday to see Toodle and was going to bring him to the hospital but he was kind of a mess from us beign gone and with 1+hr traffic each way DH ended up not taking him back to see me.

cjsbdl · October 2011

H stayed home with both grandmas and DH stayed at the hospital with us.

AlissaCell701 · October 2011

dH will be with me! I don't do hospitals and hate sleeping in them.. My dad will be here and take care of Jake so R can be with me and the baby..

dana316 · October 2011

Well, I had a c-section, and I had to have someone with me. My Mom came and stayed with Caroline for the three nights we were at the hospital.

I wouldn't have wanted my DH away from me...I needed his help a LOT, and Caroline had a blast with Grammy, so it was a win win.

ETA: My second c-section was WAY WAY WAY more painful than my first. After Caroline was born, I was up and about in less than 12 hours, with pretty minimal pain. This time was awful, I couldn't do nearly as much as i did the first time, and had way, way, way more pain.

laura1 · October 2011

DH stayed with us at the hospital. DS was with my parents for 2 nights. They picked him up at 11am, I had DD at 6pm, so he stayed that night, and the next. He had the best time with them, and I had some company at the hospital. I thought it worked out well!

JillRock96 · October 2011

DH stayed home with Ava. We didn't have any family around to stay with her overnight. Plus, I was there for 4 nights. It actually worked out wonderfully -- we would send the babies to the nursery at night, and DH would go home to Ava. We both got some really great sleep before I came home, which was so different from #1.

Cajun_gal · October 2011

My husband stayed in the hospital with us. My mom came and stayed with Dylan.

pamela-matt · October 2011

My DH stayed in the hospital with us, but he did come home every afternoon or morning to spend some time with Ry

nicolita14w · October 2011

We went to the hospital at 3am and a friend met us there and picked up James, so Matt was there for the birth, but he picked up James the next afternoon and was with him for the rest of the time till I came home (which ended up being 3 days because Ben had to stay an extra day for jaundice).

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