In Cal's big brother book it talks about how "the baby and Mommy come home after 2 days." When I first read it I thought, "What about Daddy??"
It had just never occurred to me that he wouldn't be with us, but we have another child to think about now! With Cal we were in the hospital for a week b/c he was on IV antibiotics (high C-Reactive Protein count), and DH was with us the whole time. Hopefully we'll be able to go home sooner this time. But, be it 2 days or 7...call me a big baby, I just can't imagine being there without DH! We do have my parents lined up to stay with Cal the 1st night but haven't thought past that. I suppose we should! I'm sure they'd take him for another night, but I'm not sure what's best for Cal...maybe DH should only stay with us 1 night?
So...what did you do with LO#1 when baby #2 arrived?
Re: Did DH/SO stay w/ you in hosp after LO#2?
Well, he didn't stay overnight with me for the twins, so I doubt he would stay for baby #3 (if that ever happens).
Dh actually worked the whole time I was in the hospital - I wanted it that way so he'd have more time off at home for when the boys came home.
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Dh stayed the first night while my mom stayed with DD at our house. The next night they traded. Dh stayed home with DD, and my mom stayed with me at the hospital. it was awsome, like a little slumber party. The nurses loved having her their and all of them wanted thier moms to stay with them when thier next babies are born. ( my mom didn't complain about the food/beds/lack of sleep like DH does) Who'd a thunk?
If you are a baby, I am too! My DH stayed overnight with all three. We are very fortunate to have my mom and dad and sisters and brother near to help with the sibling(s) With Gwen, DH did not stay on the (5) nights I was admitted prior to delivery, but did stay the 2.5 after she was born. I was pretty weak and sick, and had to go to the NICU every 2 hours or so and the only PP room was across the Unit so it was a bit of a walk. We liked having that time together just the three of us. He did go home more with each kid to be with the others, but from about dinnertime on, he was mine!
We pretty much put my parents in charge of the older ones, and I did not worry! They had fun, and were not traumatized by sleeping in a different house.
Both times I sent DH home shortly after delivery. He snores.
I'm not your typical wife though, and I felt better having daddy at home with Katen than anyone else. I got more rest knowing K was in good hands than I would have if he were with me. It also meant he was more ready to help out when we came home as he hadn't had as much bonding time.
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Our philosophy is different from most.
I won't get to sleep. I had to be monitored and was BF'ing so my sleep would be disturbed.
DH however COULD get some sleep but not if he stayed in the room with me. He's a grouch when he runs on little sleep. I need him to be strong and supportive not tired and cranky. He stayed the first night with #1 and I sent him home after that so at least one of us could get some good sleep.
With #2 I wanted #1's schedule disrupted as little as possible. He was gonna have enough change to deal with without starting it off with both his parents being gone for 2-3 days. That meant that DH was with him at home. They came to visit and my Mom would take #1 home so DH could stay longer.
Frankly I was so grateful for the time. It was peaceful and a great chance to bond with #2 before I had to go home and tackle the craziness that comes with a toddler and a new born.
I had sections both times and did fine either by myself or with the help of the nurses.
With #1 I wanted support for me because it was all new and scary. With #2 my focus was much more heavily on having as much support as possible available for #1.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
DH stayed with me the entire time, less a few hours he left to pick Paige up from school, take her to the park, then back to my folks house. She stayed with them for the 4 nights we were in the hospital.
I could t imagine staying alone. I needed my hubby there and he was happy to do so.
With DD, DS came in to visit on the day we had her (although that day was kind of crazy because she had to be kept for monitoring and I was exhausted after delivery). DH stayed over and then went home for a few hours the next day to spend time with DS, shower, etc. - we didnt think he would do great being in the small hospital room for too long, one visit was enough. DH stayed over again the next night and then we came home the following day.
DS was with my parents the whole time but we were living with them at the time so it was easy.
-----Lisa-----
Kelly, Mom to Christopher Shannon 9.27.06, Catherine Quinn 2.24.09, Trey Barton lost on 12.28.09, Therese Barton lost on 6.10.10, Joseph Sullivan 7.23.11, and our latest, Victoria Maren 11.15.12
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This Cluttered Life
We haven't really discussed this yet. I can't decide what I want. We've got plenty of family to keep DS so that's not an issue. I had a terrible time sleeping in the hospital and DH didn't, and it really pissed me off, the baby was sleeping and I was laying there in the dark wide awake. I didn't really need the help overnight so it wasn't all that beneficial to me to have him there.
I'll probably have him stay the first night depending on what time I deliver and what day of the week. DH will be in school when the baby is born and won't really be able to miss class like he can work, and if he's going to class he's going to need some rest.
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SUCH a great idea, I love this.
"When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame
DH didn't even stay with me when I gave birth to Nicholas. For Ava, he would come for a few hours during the day and then he would leave to be home for Nicholas.
I'm the opposite of you and just wanted alone time in the hospital. I really didn't see any reason for DH to stay with me, especially since I sent Ava to the nursery every night as soon as everyone left (like around 8pm) and she stayed there til the next morning.
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DH stayed with me. My mom stayed over the night before our induction and stayed with Toodle when we left at 3 am for the hospital. Then mid-day my brother and SIL came to our house and stayed with Toodle the rest of the time until I came home. I was only gone middle of the night Tuesday/Wednesday morning to Friday early afternoon.
DH went home during the day Thursday to see Toodle and was going to bring him to the hospital but he was kind of a mess from us beign gone and with 1+hr traffic each way DH ended up not taking him back to see me.
Well, I had a c-section, and I had to have someone with me. My Mom came and stayed with Caroline for the three nights we were at the hospital.
I wouldn't have wanted my DH away from me...I needed his help a LOT, and Caroline had a blast with Grammy, so it was a win win.
ETA: My second c-section was WAY WAY WAY more painful than my first. After Caroline was born, I was up and about in less than 12 hours, with pretty minimal pain. This time was awful, I couldn't do nearly as much as i did the first time, and had way, way, way more pain.
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