Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: VBAC with a midwife?
I switched to a midwife at 28 weeks with my first VBAC b/c the research I did and the more questions I asked I didn't feel like they truly supported my natural birth vbac plan.
I am with the same midwife practice this time around I have nothing but positive things to say about midwives in general. I like the idea that they are experienced in natural labors, much less likely to push a bunch of unecessary medical interventions, and they have NO motivation for me to have a c-section (unlike lots of Ob's who'd rather just get you into surgery b/c it's more convenient for them then dealing with a laboring mom).
My midwives have a relationship with an OB practice so that should a TRUE emergency arrive there is always an OB to perform a section. There is also always an ob on call at every hospital in the case of a true emergency
good luck with your decision. For me it was the absolute RIGHT move
I used a midwife for my VBAC and loved it! She works in the hospital at the same practice as the OBs. She was much more naturally minded and trusting in my body then my previous OB. As far as restrictions.... she didn't have any. She could pretty much do everything the OB could do (except surgery). I feel like midwives are more inclined to offer natural solutions for things (for example: induction. She suggested a foley bulb and pumping whereas an OB might just say Pitocin).
She didn't require a certain amount of time between pregnancies, although I've heard some say 18 months.
HTH!
+1
Sarah - 12/23/2008
Alex - 9/30/2011
"I say embrace the total geek in yourself and just enjoy it. Life is too short to be cool." - Shirley Manson, Garbage
I had hospital-based MWs for both my pregnancies. The first ended in an unplanned c-section, but the MW who was on call when I was laboring went to the OR with me, and helped out. I'm not sure if that's standard at most hospitals, and I'm sure is dependent on whether they have other women to attend to.
I was at a different hospital for my VBAC pregnancy, but my new MW was nothing but supportive about my plans. She wasn't there when I gave birth, though, because she's part of a pretty huge practice (15+ MW), as was my first MW.
I never met with any OBs except for when it was determined I was going to have a c-section with my first. But I think the OB consultation requirement just differs by practice/state/region.
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
I'm seeing a group of three MWs who work in conjunction with a group of five OBs. I've seen the MWs for almost all of my appts, but I did have a VBAC consult with an OB at 34 weeks.
When it comes time for L&D, one of the three MWs will be attending the birth. But there will also be an OB at the hospital from the practice, in case I need a RCS. The OB isn't actively involved in my labor, though.
With my first, I saw a different group of three hospital-based MWs who had a separate practice, but had a relationship with a group of OBs based at the same hospital. My MW called the on-call OB at some point during my labor (unbeknownst to me) since she thought I would end up with a c-section. My MW was in the OR with me assisting the OB, and I believe that would happen again if necessary.
I VBACed with a MW in the hospital. I had to meet with an OB in the practice at 16 and 36 weeks. They recommended one to me who was very VBAC friendly. Towards the end, I scheduled a c/s with the OB that I met with for almost 42 weeks (a spot that her and I were both comfortable with). I went into labor before that, anyway.
There were OBs in the hospital for back up if I needed a c/s. They were also available because they gave me pitocin while I was pushing to help make the ctx more regular, and they had to consult the OBs first.
Honestly, I contribute my VBAC to two important factors (other than the fact that I was very determined)... midwives and my doula. I don't think I could have done it without them. I LOVED having a midwife.
I switched to a midwife hospital practice after moving from TX to CO around 16 weeks. LOVED them. Seriously cannot express my gratitude in words to their group of women, my nurses, my doula, and of course my DH!
They actually offered waterbirth as an option to me early on, they never acted even the slightest bit concerned about my chances to VBAC, and they were 100% supportive from the first consultation.
We've since moved back to TX, and I've thought several times about returning to CO for my last few weeks of pregnancy next time around in hopes of another amazing VBAC with them... GL to you!
~Sweet Girl *8/18/08* c-section ~ Sweet Boy *12/2/10* VBAC ~ Sweet Boy *8/14/12* VBAC~
VBAC Birth Story 2VBAC Birth Story